Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML
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By
gntfmlingnow
| 12
Remove the underwear. No more wedgie!
Solving problems one at a time.
Solving problems one at a time.
Reply
Alwayspullout
| 7
Good ole handy... A man can only dream...
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Feared
| 9
16- I think a mustache ride from elbow would tickle my fancy a little more ;)
*view his user picture*
*view his user picture*
Reply
Feared
| 9
Elmo*
Reply
StanSmith_fml
| 9
Is rape an option at this point?
Reply
Drigr
| 9
Guess its back to long nights with Jill
By
dhall30
| 8
Poor you.... Was it really necessary to write an fml about this?
Reply
CryMoreFMLs
| 14
2 - Was your comment about this FML mecessary? No.
Neither was mine.
Neither was mine.
Reply
domking1315
| 20
Guess its just you and me again today pal (lifts hand)
Reply
gntfmlingnow
| 12
This is a bit random, but has anyone noticed a depressing lack of Enonymous' comments?
By
Icejza_DaChilla
| 7
No reason to qq, just ask her to do it while she is down there! Get some imitative mang
Reply
BABYPUNCHINGGUY
| 0
Pulling out a wedgie. Much less sexy than a hand job
Reply
SoSickWithIt
| 14
Watching a girl pull out a wedgie can still be sexy.. Don't act like you wouldn't wish to transform yourself into a thong/G-string.
I would.
I would.
Reply
BABYPUNCHINGGUY
| 0
Ok 78 but Ill still take the hand job
By
CrisisH3ro
| 0
Wtf is a duvet?
Reply
Feared
| 9
Wtf is a google?
Reply
alpaquette91
| 9
It's a comforter I'm from the US and I call my blanket a duvet.
Reply
micahsmommy
| 13
It's the way the British spell "dove". In the UK doves are actually similar in size to large bears so they are hunted and turned into bedding.
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The_Troller
| 14
That's strange, I always thought they were a type of salad topping. The more you know...
Reply
Reid5
| 6
52 - Erm, what?
A duvet is a quilt, or bedclothes. Brits spell 'dove' exactly the same.
A duvet is a quilt, or bedclothes. Brits spell 'dove' exactly the same.
Reply
Bekll
| 30
59, that went over you head, huh?
Reply
Bekll
| 30
your*
Reply
doubleohseven
| 0
You, my friend, are a moron
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SultanRS
| 12
I love it when someone asks a question, and everybody gives the wrong answer.
By
mpsteve137
| 15
Tell her you'll pick hers if she picks yours
By
bglen21
| 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking..
Show it anyway
Reply
nfjskcbdkdjdjdn
| 2
You know, there's this magical thing called sleeping, and it's commonly done in a bed. But that doesn't matter, because if you're in bed with someone, it's all about sex, right?
Reply
Zoranius
| 6
Reading this while watching Harry Potter really makes it sound like something Harry Potter could say.
Reply
xXxIracebethxXx
| 14
I don't think #9 is older than thirteen or fourteen... Such an idiotic comment.
By
texas_redneck88
| 10
What the hell is a duvet or whatever it was you called it? Since you said that y'all were layin' in bed, I'm gonna assume it's sheets or somethin'. But next time, how 'bout usin' a word that everyone knows
Reply
taerts
| 9
Duvet is a pretty common word. If you don't understand something next time, just google it; don't complain here
Reply
staymintyfresh
| 13
I read the in an extremely southern accent, I'm thinking you must have written it that way as well. Most people know what a duvet is anyway.
Reply
emmaa3451
| 11
I hate Americans who think that just because they don't know what a word means, it's not English. People say "duvet" in Canada, Australia and the UK. So fucking google it already.
Reply
Niicky_fml
| 20
A duvet is what we call a comforter here in the US. Google is our friend! :)
Reply
thiscrazything
| 1
Um, so 18, you only hate Americans for showing ignorance? I didn't realize other countries were immune to it.
Reply
xXxIracebethxXx
| 14
65 - No, he was said he "hate[s] Americans who think that just because they don't know what a word means, it's not English." Yes, it's almost always an American who doesn't know what a "fancy" word is, such as duvet. So don't be getting butthurt over a fact. Also, the fact that #10 is a Texas redneck (username), adds to the proof that he is ignorant and/or completely stupid.
Reply
datboiryan
| 6
I'm also from Texas and have never heard of a duvet...
Reply
Almandine
| 7
People use it in the US too... We just have a lot of morons who aren't willing to look up word that are new to them.
Reply
kkillaj
| 5
Man I'm Canadian and I never heard of a duvet lol people call them blankets or quilts
Reply
ssnowywinter
| 0
I must be the only one thinking 10 is some type of troll, because every redneck I've met would never type like that.
Reply
The_Hitdude
| 12
Christ Almighty this guy's username suits him aptly. Please, for the sake of all humanity, don't reproduce.
Reply
MissHayleyJames
| 7
Oh my God people. Seriously. I'm from Texas and I've heard of a duvet. Don't use Texas as an excuse.
Reply
norr14
| 4
Or how about you learn all the words we all obviously know or u can just shut up and commenting
Reply
twisted_cherub
| 14
14- I hope you're saying you read it in a southern accent because he's from Texas, not just because he's ignorant. Thinking everyone from the South is stupid is just as bad as not knowing words of other English dialects. It's all ignorance.
Reply
doubleohseven
| 0
Other countries aren't immune, they're just not ignorant enough to speak before opening their mouth. I am an American high school student and I see this every day.
That said, 18, calm down you probably don't know of any real life Americans. I've been to Canada and it rocked so much harder than the US but there's no need to brag. And we've got enough morons with guns and enough money in the nuclear weapons programs here to tell you not to go calling names to Americans.
That said, 18, calm down you probably don't know of any real life Americans. I've been to Canada and it rocked so much harder than the US but there's no need to brag. And we've got enough morons with guns and enough money in the nuclear weapons programs here to tell you not to go calling names to Americans.
Reply
emmaa3451
| 11
114- actually I use to live in Los Angeles for 3 years, where I went to school, and I've been to pretty much every major USA city, where we've got tons of friends. Just saying :)
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GUNZnRAIGN
| 6
next time, how 'bout puttin' in the effort to finish ya'll words, bud.
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Lillith_fml
| 5
may I only point out that it was us that gave you people the language so how about not slagging off your motherhood, eh?
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ashadele1511
| 3
Lol I'm from the US and I never have heard or seen this word but I got excited because it's used in the UK. Love the UK.
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ironthor13
| 0
Lmao very true!
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bellatrix0805
| 2
Everyone who is literate knows what a duvet is...
By
jrupp54
| 0
I think the real "FML" was that he was actually excited for a handjob!
Reply
attorco
| 4
I was thinking the same thing!
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nofearjenshere
| 12
Whats wrong with handjobs?
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DjeePee
| 24
Hey, it's not because you never got a pleasurable handjob that you need to project your disatisfaction on others.
Reply
l0v3p4in
| 7
Nothing, especially if a blowjob follows.
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cajekraze
| 7
I just think OP is a douche with an awesome girlfriend
Reply
downtime
| 12
45 I think it meant that its odd that seeing a hand go under the covers he automatically assumed shes about to instigate that. My junk must get really disappointed a lot, I often put my hand under the covers and not touch it.
By
sincerelyjay
| 13
*wife slips hand under duvet*
Op: Yes! Finally-
Wife: Stupid underwear.. Hey do you think I need a bigger size?
Op: Yes! Finally-
Wife: Stupid underwear.. Hey do you think I need a bigger size?
Reply
emmaa3451
| 11
OP doesn't have a wife (I hope). Said person is his girlfriend ;)
Reply
coffee_man900
| 16
Maybe OP's Girlfriend is sincerelyjay's Wife. Bet you never thought of that, eh? :)
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norotors
| 16
Duvet? That a British thing?
Reply
sincerelyjay
| 13
Oh whoopsie! *girlfriend
By
br0ccoli
| 14
I'm sure if you started, she would help you finish :)
Just tell her to wash her nasty fecal-infested, wedgie-picking hand.
Just tell her to wash her nasty fecal-infested, wedgie-picking hand.
Reply
br0ccoli
| 14
Yes, yes we do. Gotta keep it clean :D
Solving problems one at a time.