Busted
By faulty number - 28/01/2013 23:25 - United States - Port Saint Lucie
By faulty number - 28/01/2013 23:25 - United States - Port Saint Lucie
By asdfghjkl - 10/02/2010 19:20 - United States
By baldiesmom - 29/09/2016 19:07 - United States - Union
By fatty - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Calgary
By xharmonyx - 24/04/2012 08:29 - United States
By dave - 27/10/2009 15:36 - United States
By Anonymous - 02/10/2009 21:07 - United States
By ByeByeBirdie - 29/06/2016 22:41 - United States - Montgomery
By Hellish - 21/10/2016 04:11 - United States - Gurnee
By Zooep - 24/10/2016 13:54
By Forgetfull - 02/02/2010 17:07 - United States
By lexii - 05/05/2012 05:01 - United States
By wetandhungry - 06/10/2016 13:11 - United States - Houston
By Jason - 12/08/2010 20:33 - United States
By Anonymous - 08/10/2012 22:27 - Canada - Truro
By Kay - 20/10/2016 10:37
By Anonymous - 23/11/2009 09:54 - United States
By rtrim29 - 26/12/2009 16:18 - United States
By Anonymous - 30/03/2012 14:35 - United Kingdom
By titou - 05/01/2009 03:33 - France
By leapple - 14/03/2010 01:17 - United States
By smalls727 - 22/11/2016 17:46
By mpetitto - 15/08/2016 00:44 - United States - Fairmont
By zappy - 11/10/2009 04:40 - United States
By neverunderstood - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Italy - San Pietro In Casale
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
By breedles - 10/12/2016 22:20
Hey guys, OP here. I love the comments xD This happened a couple of months ago, and actually, before this incident he did confide in me that he was bisexual, and as I am open minded and bisexual as well, we did do some experimenting with a strap on to see if I could satisfy him on that level. His comment was meant to suggest that because I didn't have a REAL penis, it wasn't enough for him, which was painful to hear, because obviously, there was nothing I could do about it and I was very invested in our relationship. He changed his stance on the matter when he was sober, but we did move out of a boyfriend girlfriend relationship and into more of a FWB relationship, and we're both happier now. :)
By graphite01 - 01/11/2016 04:08 - United States - Eugene
By ChildhoodTerror - 26/12/2016 06:40
By errints234234 - 13/05/2010 23:31 - United States
Keywords
OP here. The instability of the umbrella was due to my husband cutting apart the stabilizing framework under the table that would normally keep this kind of thing from happening because he bought me a "much more awesome" umbrella that was too big for the table. He had good intentions, but I had a feeling the cutting of the framework would be a problem later. And no, there will most definitely not be a next time. As for vacuuming it up, maybe so, if I had a shop vac. As it was, he had loaned our shovel to a friend, I had no gloves, and the grass was long. I improvised and ended up using a hoe and two dust pans. It worked.