By FuglyBetty - 24/02/2016 22:48 - Norway - Arendal
The Top
How could you?
By Harry641 - 23/02/2016 22:53 - United Kingdom - Hounslow
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By NO NO NO - 05/08/2013 21:42 - Netherlands - Den Haag
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Burn unit
By Anonymous - 28/01/2019 18:00 - United States - Arcade
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Tipsy
By Anon - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Fayetteville
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Let em in
By Sleepy - 19/03/2019 20:00
Karma karma karma karma chameleon, you come and go.
By Karma - 15/03/2017 02:00
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Nice try, Sharon
By Anonymous - 23/06/2013 10:38 - United States - Fountain Valley
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By MrsMusselLady - 24/04/2017 18:26 - United Kingdom - Huntingdon
MrsMusselLady tells us more.
Lol no, it was my first weekend off after working 8 days in a row! I had gotten off work at 0700 and went straight home to that whole situation.
Stalking
By Idiot32 - 25/05/2019 02:00
By sciencetime - 10/12/2016 11:33
The more you know
By Jeff - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff
Keywords
Hey everyone! OP here hoping to give you all some clarity! First off, I wasn't high but I was tired and I wasn't wearing my glasses. I live on a farm in the middle of bumble-**** nowhere and we have a small tree, about 5'6" tall, a little ways off our back porch. It was about 2:00 a.m. and my young daughter had gotten sick on her sheets so I was running to put them in the washing machine (which is in the barn) so that they wouldn't stain. I heard a rustling sound and I thought I saw a person moving out of the corner of my eye. Without my glasses and the fact that it was really dark mixed with my overall anxiety because my husband wasn't home caused me to drop the sheets and run back into the house to protect my kids. I know it's stupid and really horrible that I wasted precious resources on something so trivial but I was terrified. My husband is the head of a very small drug task force and even though we live in a pretty sleepy town, he still gets threats now and again. Furthermore we recently moved from Sacramento because I was almost kidnapped about 2 years ago while I was walking home from the park with my kids and I didn't want to take ANY chances. I was treated with respect by the great officers who came out and my husband was immediately notified. He wasn't able to come home right away but one of his off duty officers came by and stayed on the couch the rest of the night. Thank you all for the well wishes and I appreciate all the great puns!! :)