By StaceZN - 22/12/2016 08:52
The Top
By Firequeen - 21/11/2016 21:44
By pantless - 23/10/2016 09:31 - Australia - Sydney
By Anonymous - 06/09/2016 18:54 - United States
By xoothc08 - 25/02/2009 22:06 - United States
By steph - 31/05/2016 20:12 - United States - Helotes
Potholer
By wtfbabe - 22/06/2018 05:00
Thanks, I hate it
By kkkk - 31/01/2011 15:44
By Ciabatta - 20/11/2008 11:10 - France
By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 01:33 - United States - Chicago
Cover up
By this_is_fucked - 24/10/2009 21:23 - Zimbabwe
By Anonymous - 25/09/2016 04:27 - United States - Cabot
By Noname - 25/02/2009 22:06 - Canada
By parent - 08/03/2018 01:30
By Coeurdencre - 06/06/2016 03:33
Nice to know
By Anonymous - 04/06/2016 14:52 - United States - Bethlehem
Assumptions
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Astoria
By gavthewarealpaca - 16/05/2016 09:36 - United States - Holly
gavthewarealpaca tells us more.
Heftychonk
By just-a-fat-cat - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - West Bend
By Nexpecto - 21/03/2015 22:29 - United States
Nexpecto tells us more.
This is the most spot on reply haha! The scariest part of this whole ordeal is that I was awake but had my eyes closed and still didn't hear a drunk intruder come in. I'm a tetraplegic meaning that I have little use of my arms and none in my legs. I have my bed in the living room so that I still have things to do at night since I am bed bound. Because of my lack of independence, I have caregivers that come in daily to help with my needs. My roommate left the door unlocked around midnight so that he would not have to get up to let my caregiver in on Saturday morning. The last thing we were expecting was a drunk man urinating in the bathroom at 3:15 AM! My dog Bella makes the sweetest pit bull but worst guard because of how friendly she is. As frustrating as it it, we still love her. This was definitely the luckiest I've been in a long time and the last time the door is unlocked at night. If I had been completely alone that night there would have been absolutely no way for me to get his drunk ass out. Thankfully it was just a wasted man looking for a toilet instead of a crack head looking to get his next fix
By Slaanesh - 12/12/2008 12:08 - France
By rob - 23/11/2008 10:59 - France
By THAT'S THE LAST STRAW!!! - 20/11/2018 14:00 - Philippines - Pasay City
By jdmarine83 - 07/10/2011 19:32 - United States
By TheJuggla17 - 22/12/2009 05:45 - United States
By Shalamar - 15/12/2009 01:30 - Canada
By DamnMyOvaries - 03/05/2017 00:00 - United States - Groves
Higher education
By mermaidkeels - 08/09/2016 04:54 - United States - Miami
Choose wisely
By limegreenpoopie - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Valrico
Not a good sign
By DeepFriedZombie - 09/08/2016 00:18
Keywords
Hey everybody, OP here, I love all the puns you have made and the concern. The spring that hit my leg went pretty far in, it chipped a small piece off my femur and the one in my abdomen was only skin deep. I'm currently in the hospital recovering from the surgery to get the little chip of bone out of my leg. I'm doing well and will be out within a few days! Thank you for the publish!!