By Nexpecto - 21/03/2015 22:29 - United States

Today, I was startled by my roommate marching a drunk man out of our apartment. Somehow he found his way in complete darkness into the bathroom without alerting me or my dog next to the only door. He mistook the clothes hamper for the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 828
You deserved it 2 874

Nexpecto tells us more.

Nexpecto 28

This is the most spot on reply haha! The scariest part of this whole ordeal is that I was awake but had my eyes closed and still didn't hear a drunk intruder come in. I'm a tetraplegic meaning that I have little use of my arms and none in my legs. I have my bed in the living room so that I still have things to do at night since I am bed bound. Because of my lack of independence, I have caregivers that come in daily to help with my needs. My roommate left the door unlocked around midnight so that he would not have to get up to let my caregiver in on Saturday morning. The last thing we were expecting was a drunk man urinating in the bathroom at 3:15 AM! My dog Bella makes the sweetest pit bull but worst guard because of how friendly she is. As frustrating as it it, we still love her. This was definitely the luckiest I've been in a long time and the last time the door is unlocked at night. If I had been completely alone that night there would have been absolutely no way for me to get his drunk ass out. Thankfully it was just a wasted man looking for a toilet instead of a crack head looking to get his next fix

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Comments

MrConcise 34

If he asked you what he was, you'd tell him "Uri-ninja."

29 1
Nexpecto 28

This is the most spot on reply haha! The scariest part of this whole ordeal is that I was awake but had my eyes closed and still didn't hear a drunk intruder come in. I'm a tetraplegic meaning that I have little use of my arms and none in my legs. I have my bed in the living room so that I still have things to do at night since I am bed bound. Because of my lack of independence, I have caregivers that come in daily to help with my needs. My roommate left the door unlocked around midnight so that he would not have to get up to let my caregiver in on Saturday morning. The last thing we were expecting was a drunk man urinating in the bathroom at 3:15 AM! My dog Bella makes the sweetest pit bull but worst guard because of how friendly she is. As frustrating as it it, we still love her. This was definitely the luckiest I've been in a long time and the last time the door is unlocked at night. If I had been completely alone that night there would have been absolutely no way for me to get his drunk ass out. Thankfully it was just a wasted man looking for a toilet instead of a crack head looking to get his next fix

20 0
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

At least he didn't mistake your bed for the toilet

23 11
VoldooPed 20

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
5 53
katydid91 31

Just because it's called the Land Of The Free doesn't mean you are free to do whatever you want. Breaking and Entering is still a crime in all 50 states.

38 6
Pinkgal123 24

He didn't break. They left it unlocked. Oh the irony.

1 2
snowflake_3325 7

Be thankful that's the worst that happened, maybe next time double check that the door is locked. Good thing your roommate doesn't sleep as deeply as you!

29 5
CandyPewPewPew 29

You and your dog must be just as drunk as that man.

7 12
ThatLobster 24

That's really ruff op. Why woof he do that? Is he barking mad or something? Sorrynotsorry

4 42
clairesucks 37

No he was very pleased that his clothes had been used as a toilet by a drunk man.

16 2
Mauskau 35

Something is missing, did he come in with your roommate or just somehow end up in your home? If it was the former, your roommate must be feeling pretty bad for letting that happen, if the latter, you should work on your home security.

16 5
rockwrench 18

Agreed #10. How the hell did he get in. Most people lock doors when sleeping. Something is fishy in this story.

0 0
MalcolmRodrigues 9

is there at least one comment here voted positive?

71 8
Fall3nAngel 22

Yeah, some of the people on here can be really nasty for no good reason.

13 4
WaltzingPhanthom 23

If a drunk guy can barge into your house, so can a serial killer. And so can I.

13 7
domolovesyoshi 33

Are you a serial killer? Because that would kill two birds with one stone.

9 1