By Anonymous - 01/01/2014 05:38 - United States - Albany
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Are you fucking serious #1? Spank an 11 month old baby who hasn't got the cognitive development to understand right and wrong? It's common knowledge that babies bite their mothers out of frustration, not because they're evil. The baby will laugh because of the parents reaction to the biting which is usually a scream or yell. They don't know what they're doing hurts. How could they possibly understand that? They're a baby for gods sake. If you cannot handle a babies natural reactions to feelings of frustration, being overtired, upset etc. then please do not have a baby. Any 'parent' that would spank their 11 month old baby would deserve to have their child removed from the home and placed into care. Spanking a baby is abuse.
If parents must spank their children, they should do so when their child is at an age where their brains have developed enough for them to understand why they are being 'disciplined'. spanking a 5 year old who understands right and wrong is a lot different to spanking a baby who has been on this earth for only 11 months and cannot distinguish between right and wrong. Discipline for babies is best achieved by saying no firmly and then distracting the baby with a toy or activity.
You idiots that are saying spank, or bite back, or using Tabasco sauce must not be parents. The kid is 11 months, that is not appropriate discipline for that age. They do not have the cognitive development to know that's wrong. Most would consider the biting back or Tabasco abuse.
Must be that age. Our son went through that stage for a few weeks at about that age. While he was biting, my wife and I would pull at his ear. The minute he stopped biting, we'd let go. Not as 'punishment', but to show him that what he was doing hurt. For those saying that spanking a 10 month old is different than a five year old, i agree, but for opposite reasons. A 10 month old can not understand a lecture, and cannot understand 'time out', but they understand a stern voice and a swat on the butt. As they grow older, every kid is different. For some kids, a stern look is more than enough to keep them in line. For others, nothing short of a physical consequence will work. My parents divorced when I was young. dad spanked, and mom didn't. I love both of my parents immensely, but i can tell you that as we were growing up, dad got more respect out of my brother and I, while mom got ignored.
Ok 36, let's take it down a notch ok? Actually, toddlers bite because it is their way of communication as well as they love the attention they're getting from the person biting them. Also, if the little one is teething, they tend to bite more as well. A quick pat on the top of the hand or gentle pressing against the lips with a stern NO should do the trick. Spanking doesn't have to involve hardcore hitting; in fact, I doubt 1 meant to beat the holy hell out it the little one, but you have to show your child you mean business. Eleven months is old enough to start teaching him right from wrong, with in reasonable ways.
Tickling or give him toys is just going to make him think that he has done nothing wrong and encourage him to do it more. Every time someone hears spanking they think of people beating their kids. A small swift on the but, that I assume is diapered, wouldn't hurt him. Its the shock of the action that gets the attention more than the actual action itsself. When people say to bite him back they aren't saying to savagely bite him and break skin. A small nibble, enough to make him feel it, would suffice. If you don't want to do that put him in the corner or something, let him know he is doing wrong. Dont tickle him or give him toys. That's completely counter productive.
#36- seriously? my parents spanked me when I was little when I did something stupid. according to my mom I did this exact same thing to her when I was around the same age as the kid in this FML and my mom busted my ass for it and guess what, I stopped biting. there's a difference between discipline and abuse, but you don't let your kid do whatever they want.
#36, no, an 11-month-old cannot differentiate between right and wrong, but how is it going to learn? My parents never disciplined my little brother when he was young and look where that got him. He's a 7-year-old spoiled brat who throws full-fledged temper tantrums and can't even feed himself. I'm glad my father disciplined me when I was a child before my mother could butt in.
my son is 18 months and he went through this stage at 11months those saying they dont understand what they are doing are wrong my son new he was doing wrong and would run off after he had bitten me to hide I spanked him every time he bit someone (not hard) and within a week the biteing stopped so dont tell me they dont understand
There are other alternatives than spanking a child if you're not comfortable with that. My mom chose to not spank me, and I still have respect for my parents and other people. Some parents simply aren't comfortable with spanking their children because they consider it cruel when there are plenty of other alternatives to discipline a child. For example, when I was about a year old, I bit my moms neck while she was holding me. My mom simply told me no biting and when I did it again she put me down for a while, even though I was crying for her to pick me back up. I learned that biting was not a good behavior, and I stopped. So spanking is not the only option with little kids.
Spanking only shows that you have no clue about how to be a parent. There are ALWAYS other ways to discipline your child. And you are just feeding his lust for attention by your reaction, so of course he will keep doing it. The fact that it's going so far is because you reacted wrong when it first happened.
#83 spanking is not the only option. While yes some children need more discipline than others, but spanking doesn't have to be it. There are tons of other ways to discipline a child. Personally I don't agree with spanking, so I wouldn't do it. I'd find another way to discipline my child, and with a baby, it's generally saying no until they understand and like I said, not holding them or giving them what they want until they demonstrate appropriate behavior. Discipline doesn't have to be physical. And on a side note, for everyone who's saying an 11 month old doesn't understand the difference between right and wrong, they do. They not fully understand what actions are right and wrong yet, but they do understand the concept that some things are right and other things are wrong.
Okay, covering yourself in Tabasco sauce or biting your child is low. That's not discipline; that's revenge, and he's not even 1. He ought to be spanked, though. He's old enough to put together that every time he bites mom, he'll get spanked, and the behavior will stop. True, babies don't know anything when they're born. That's why they NEED to be spanked. Parents are suppose to teach.
Those saying that spamming our biting back is cruel or abusive are the ones that don't have kids. my fourteen month old started biting me at about one year. at first I tried the no method (after wiping the tears from my eyes because he bit so hard), which of course did me no good. he would just look at me and laugh. swatting his butt did no good either. I finally went to my mother for advice, and she told me that when I got into that phase, she did the same thing her mother did to her: bite back. not hard, but enough to tell them they're hurting. I had to do it exactly one time and have not been bitten a single time since. so, to those saying biting back our spanking is cruel? good luck with your unruly kids.
In Sweden you're not allowed to spank/hit your child and I'd say kids here have a great amount of respect and discipline. I think it's better to show your child what is right rather than showing them what is wrong (in this case hurting people) by doing the same thing to them...
I have a 14 month old actually. He occasionally bites. I tell him no in a very firm voice and look him straight in the eyes. I do not punish him with physical force no matter what. I'd hate for my child to think hitting is an acceptable way to treat another that is doing something they do not like. My son NEVER bites other children. He is extremely well behaved around other adults and babies and has learnt to pat others and animals very gently. If you did some research you'd figure out very quickly that spanking only teaches your children to fear you. Using your words to explain to them what they have done wrong and giving time outs is a more effective form of discipline. Of course because a baby doesn't understand language fully, they aren't going to understand what you're telling them but they should have an understanding of the word 'no'. I really feel very sorry for your children and for all of you who were spanked by parents with no patience to teach you the difference between right and wrong without their hand or a belt. You can break the cycle though. Learn. Read up on the best forms of disciplining a child without having to resort to physical punishment. It doesn't mean your child will grow up to be a 'brat'.
Babies may not understand "right and wrong," but they understand something called cause and effect. When I was little I had a game where I pressed a button, and a bear did something (like brush his hair, pick up clothes, etc.). Although not old enough to even remotely remember the game, I understood cause and effect. The kid bites, you punish him. A spank isn't smacking the kid until he's red. It's a swat in the bum to get the effect through his head.
Spanking an 11 month old is not going to work. I have an almost 1 year old. He used to bite me when I tried to nurse and as mean as it is. Yelling ow loudly scared him into stopping. I will not spank my child because anytime the thought pops into my head it is anger. I have realized it does nothing but make him hit back. So I will use other methods. To each their own, try telling him loudly, without screaming at the top if your lungs of course, at him that it hurts, or ow. It will scare him and he will stop.
#137 Purebliss- what gives you the right to say whether or not #83 has experience or not. How ignorant are you. I personally believe in spanking, as I was spanked and turned out fine. However I also believe in time out, warning them and counting to three. It depends on the child as to how you react to them. I bit my brother when he was little because he bit into my arm drawing blood badly. He never bit me back, everyone has their own way of discipline, however you don't need to attack everyone about it.
They start biting you when they start teething. Their little gums are hurting! Try giving them a teething toy, so they know chewing on you isn't an option. That's what you try before spanking IMHO. I had little bite marks on my knees a couple of months ago. It DOES stop after their toofers pop out
now a days we have gotten so soft this person is saying spank not beat. just like now some parents put their kids in sports that don't keep score "I don't want my child to think of himself as a loser" in life there is always a winner & a loser. gotta teach em young. js
Purebliss, my parents spanked me when I was a kid, and I never feared them. I loved them unconditionally then, now, and always will because I turned out to be a pretty damn good kid because they weren't afraid to discipline me regardless of where we were or who we were with.
For one thing, I've been spanked and disciplined like that most of my life. I was a nice toddler, so that was ok, but I got bad around the age of 3-10. Both of my parents were in the service so they were more intense on the punishments and spanking. Something's were even just miscommunications, in which I had nothing to do with what I was getting spanked for. I don't feel upset or complain about it, because I've turned into a respectable young teenager and a matured academically enhanced leader, a good friend, sibling, and child. The discipline is what has made me what I am today, and I'm happy about it.
#77 My parents did not spank me either and I'm grateful that they didn't. I agree that there are other better ways to discipline your child that are not so "old-fashioned" as spanking. Think about it: everyone's grandparents probably used it on THEIR children since it was the easiest option. I still to this day (even at 19) have the utmost respect for my parents, but it is born out of love, and not out of fear.
Did, At any time during my comment, did I say my parents bit me. A lot of people exaggerate this bull crap way too much. People automatically think of biting as taking out pieces of the child's flesh. And imagine spanking as giving welts and black eyes to kids. BREAKING NEWS, ITS NOT. Next people are going to say sticking a child in the corner is 15 years of solitary confinement. ITS JUST ENOUGH TO TELL THE KID THEY'RE WRONG.
When I was biting my mum she just screamed and it shocked me enough that I never did it again. I have a huge amount of respect to both of my parents thats not to say you should never spank your child if other methods don't work as long as you are not really hurting them it is fine.
Been there... Takes a while, but then it's over... Good luck for you.
Time to introduce him to the bottle or a sippy cup. If not, then I feel sorry for your nipples.
5? Why does it have to be such an extreme age? There is a normal middle ground. My daughter weaned herself from nursing at 11 months. (She also ate solids) I had hope to breast feed her until she was a bit older but she was too much of a busy body to sit still by that age. So I pumped and stored/froze enough milk to last until she was 14 months plus. She also went through a biting phase where she thought it funny to bite to get a rise out of me. The OP needs to be firm with her discipline and make it clear that biting will not be tolerated!
I still nurse my son who is turning 1 Jan 4th. He bites when he's not hungry, because he can't say not hungry yet. It hurts a lot but I take him off and let him play. He has 6 teeth and when he was 8 months and teething and using his gums to bite and pull I got the biting to stop quick by yelling ow and putting him down on the floor. He doesn't bite out of fun anymore like he used to because he learned you bite you don't get milk. He will not accept much solid foods from me which is why I will continue to nurse and feed solids when he accepts even after his birthday.
Yeah, I am serious. I have a 3yr old who went through a short biting phase around 6 months. I NEVER bit him back or inflicted pain upon him, and he still learned better. Violence against children is NOT the answer. Letting a child get burned after being warned, if he doesnt listen and chooses to touch the stove is letting him experience a natural consequence. That is not the same as a parent intentionally inflicting pain on their child. By your logic, parents should burn their children slightly to teach them that hot things hurt.
I agree with 8, bite him back. Not too hard, just enough to show him that it hurts. I had to do the same with my younger sister growing up and it worked pretty well.
My cousin was a biter when we were young (about 2 1/2). During a visit, I had teeth marks up and down my arms because of her. All the adults told me to bite her back; problem was, I just wasn't a biter. So, when she bit me once too often, I cold cocked her and knocked her across the room (remember, we were both the same age). She didn't come near me for the rest of the visit, and never bit anyone again. While I don't condone violence in disciplining children, it sure did feel good at the time.