By Anonymous - 15/10/2012 04:07 - United States - Aurora

Today, I told my daughter that she won't be going to her homecoming dance as punishment for her terrible grades. She's been crying and singing "If I Die Young" in her room for hours. At this point, I don't know if I need to call a therapist or a vocal coach. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 496
You deserved it 10 134

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What about a tutor instead of both?

She may be giving you a hard time now, but I honestly believe that if you stick it out and teach her that her actions have consequences, she will appreciate it so much more when she is an adult and be better of for it.

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I wasn't allowed to get my lisence for an entire summer after my junior year because my grades weren't very good. No D's or anything, but my father wasn't happy. So this isn't that bad, in my opinion.

That is a suitable punishment 1.

At my school you weren't allowed at homecoming if you had really terrible grades.

I'm a teenager and can really only speak for myself, but I don't think homecoming is a "major event"... Maybe prom because it only happens once (assuming you don't have junior proms), but homecoming? I think OP's daughter is being overdramatic. The punishment sounds fair.

I don't even have homecoming at my school... Technical schools, yay!

I agree 100%

1, that's the point of a punishment. They aren't supposed to fit around your schedule. I don't think you really understand that there are bigger things in life than homecoming. OP, good choice. It's something that'll stick with her and I'm pretty sure she'll think twice about her grades next time.

My friend thought prom was more important than my graduation.... That would've been fine if she wasn't a junior, but yeah homecoming is not an important event since it happens every year in highschool.

Let me tell you something. At my high school, if you have bad grades, you're not allowed to go to homecoming. First off, I think this is a fair punishment. If you make bad grades, why would someone allow their child to party when they could be studying. Its clearly fair.

I was grounded from my homecoming one year. Sure it sucks, but it's not a major event. They have one every year.

@1- graduation is also a major event on a teenagers calendar, if her grades don't come up she will miss out on that too. The punishment fits the crime.

I completely agree, 1. Despite the fact that punishments are not meant to be good for the child's schedule, you shouldn't take away something as important as homecoming. Sure, her grades need improvement, but taking away a huge social event on a teen's calendar is kind of extreme.

268 - Except for the fact that a homecoming dance really isn't as important as grades are. It's an annual thing. It's not like prom or graduation, that you only get one or two chances to go to. Trust me, from a high school girl's point of view, homecoming really isn't that important or great. OP's daughter is completely overreacting.

As a former School Board President I know she's making sure the bad grades will drop out with her daughter . Too bad there aren't degrees on parenting. Oh excuse me. The girls mom would have failed the course.

280- how would you know what school she goes to. Also homecoming happens once EVERY SINGLE YEAR OF FRIGGIN HIGHSCHOOL. It's one dance and its not like is prom

I totally agree with this, you ruined a teenagers memory and I hope you understand that I hate you:)

biiiiiitch. you. not the child.

@268- That's not extreme punishment. There are other years that this girl can go to homecoming. And being a girl in high school, I'd rather be grounded during home coming than grounded during prom.

That is a good punishment. It doesnt matter what the event is. If your kid has bad grades, you punish them.

Why does this have -152? It should have at least +152.

What about a tutor instead of both?

How about a singing tutor who also is a motivational speaker? :D

how about getting a therapist that tutor education and singing?

How about a tutor that talks to you about your problems while singing math problems?

Get a math tutor who is a Siamese twin. One does math the other one is a vocal coach.

"It's okaaaay to be different giiiiirl, and five times five equals TWEEENTY FIIIIIVE!!!!"

Have her date an ex vocal coach who decided the money wasn't very good so he went back to school to become a licensed therapist, but is also someone who will whisper sexy math problems in her ear that she has to solve if she wants him to keep going. *puff puff* *Rereads comment* Ooooh, now I understand why my English teacher called me the queen of run-on sentences....

I believe Chris Farley as Matt Foley would satisfy all of her needs.

Or maybe you could get her a tutor to help her with her grades?! Either way you could sing something right back to her, may I suggest "let it burn?"

She may be giving you a hard time now, but I honestly believe that if you stick it out and teach her that her actions have consequences, she will appreciate it so much more when she is an adult and be better of for it.

That could happen, or she can rebel even harder trying to get back at the mom but ends up getting in more trouble. Just a possibility :3

Mom wears the pants, remember? Daughter isn't getting her way just because she rebels and pisses mom off more. That's not how the parent/child relationship works, no matter how much a kid thinks they can get away with something if they just cry a little harder.

41- groundings actually work. If my mom didn't ground me from things for my grades I would probably be into drugs or dropped out of high school.

Or keep up the hard-ass parenting crap and your kids will hate you. Fuck you mom

Your folks must be veeeeery proud of you, then, 205.

Lol i think my comment was worded incorrectly because im saying not to rebel against you parents because either way you are fucked haha. At least didnt get buried so maybe some people understood.

Personally I think taking away a dance is not necessary. High school dances are a lot of fun and she's going to want to remember them when she's older. I think taking away cell phone/ I-pod would be more effective in the long run.

Oh yes. They're lots of fun. A couple hours of grinding. How can you go wrong?

251 - it kind of depends, really. If she's immature enough to cry over not being able to go to a homecoming dance, she's probably still got a couple more years of high school left. There will be another homecoming dance next year. Grades are more important than dressing up and dancing.

Once upon a time... Quite a fairy tale. Of course parents aren't trained to raise kids. Read a book. Homecoming is special. Better to get a promise to try harder than set the kid up for dropping out THINK ABOUT IT ( former school board president)

Yes. What is the consequence when her daughter drops out?????

279 - homecoming really isn't that special. It comes every year. It's a privilege that has every right to be taken away from the daughter by OP (or school, as some people have added). And I highly doubt the daughter will drop out. The poor grades are mostly likely from being lazy and from unwillingness to do the work she's assigned, not because she doesn't "get it". Do you realize how many kids use that as an excuse for their laziness? I did during my freshman year, and, looking back in my junior year now, I've realized how ridiculous I was being. OP's daughter will (hopefully) wise up soon enough, and realize how stupid she's acting.

^^ Never got asked. Sensitive subject

I was asked freshman year, sophmore year, and this year. I ended up going during my sophmore year. Spent $20 to go to my school, and listen to shitty music while watching a bunch of hormone-driven kids basically dry hump each other. Boring. Not exactly my idea of fun.

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Not going to homecoming is NOT going to ruin her whole year. She shouldn't get what she wants just because it's "an important event." I'm sure now she's realized what she needs to do if she wants to go other places.

Consequences teach people to change for the better. They're for the best. Grow up.

I agree with 5 !!

I never went to any dances in high school, and my years were never any worse for it.

Exactly! I skipped my homecoming this year and my year isn't "ruined" because of it.

The mom should give this girl some perspective on her situation and make her watch documentaries about people in truly horrible situations :P maybe that would shut her up

Homecoming sucks anyway, just a bunch of grinding and loud ghetto music in a dark, crowded, un-air-conditioned cafeteria. (at least where I am, a middle class area)

-53 I hate to be one of "those people", but you comment has nearly *perfect* correlation with your profile picture. (Also, I didn't go either, it's not that big of a deal.)

Cresspel- you created an account just to be thumbed down to oblivion on your first comment. I find this utterly hilarious. I'm guessing you're OP's daughters age for you to think that.

Where the hell did you come from, that homecoming is more important than Winter Ball AND Prom? For my school having shitty grades meant you weren't going to the dances anyway.

For all we know she may understand her classes just fine, she just doesn't do the work required. I had horrible grades in school. I understood everything, aced my tests but hated doing the homework. Homework was half, if not more, of the grade. If this is the case then yes, the punishment was more than suitable.

However on the flip side of that if it is that she just doesn't understand and she is doing the work then Mom should be hiring a tutor and not punishing her daughter for a failure of understanding. We are all kind of just trying to assume that the mom is in the right on this one but for all we know this could be a case of "OMG you got a B? Who the hell gets a B? You're grounded." Which is a bit extreme. As many people have pointed out the average school bars you from dances, so if the OP's daughter wasn't told by the school she can't go, she's more than likely not in any actual danger of failing.

30- you're wearing a hat sideways. Of course you do.

My school didn't ban you from school functions for bad grades so I suppose it depends on where you live and the school itself.

145 - Screw that, I'm YOUGER (No, not little babby younger) than OP's bitchy daughter by what it sounds like, and know how stupid the daughter is acting.

At the top of her voice

281 Wtf is wrong with you.

What makes you assume she doesn't understand what's going on in school? For all we know, she could be a slacker. Don't be so quick to assume

Even if she is a slacker, she still wouldn't understand what's going on in school. Thats what slacking does, so he didn't assume anything. Also taking homecoming away isn't going to solve anything.

you're fuckin stupid

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After reading your comment I'm beginning to wonder if you even went to school in the first place.

Please pay attention in school. A dance is the least of your worry.

"There is always next year" is exactly what I would tell the daughter. Along with a get better grades stipulation.

Your comment contradicts itself. OP deserves it because homecoming is so important, but there's always next year? Doesn't sound so important to me.

6 I just didn't like your comment. There is always next year. And don't schools usually have more than one big dance? At my school there was homecoming, and Echoes, which was just like homecoming or a mini prom. That girl will be fine. If not being able to go to homecoming is such an issue for her, then she has an easy life.

-47 I gotta say, I really admire your comment; that last sentence was very well put.

It seems evident from your grammar, that you didn't do much schooling yourself.

exactly -_- there's always next year so the kid needs to get over it!

OP's daughter isn't the only one that needs a tutor. Not to be a grammar nazi but that sentence was just baaaad #6.

Your daughter played it all wrong. She should have sung some JB or 1D until you couldn't stand it anymore and just let her go to her dance. Unless you're that kind of mom who would duct tape her mouth up and tie her up.

They BOTH SUCK.

Some of us don't have to wait 10 years, Alan. How about comparing 1Direction, Justin Beiber, and Skrillex? What kind o shit would Skrillex fall under?

"if you're a 1d hater go DIE" sounds like you know a lot about suicide and respect young lady.

No honey, it's you who needs to learn respect. You don't see anyone else getting angry and cursing do you? Nope, it's just you who is throwing a childish temper tantrum. If you truly want respect from others you need to grow up and treat them with respect as well.

Alan is a beautiful British gentleman? He can sing better than all of those prepubescent teens...even though that's not much of a compliment, sorry Alan :3

Saved you from suicide? LAWL! I can picture it now: You're sad, thinking you're ugly, wanting to kill yourself. Theeeeennn all of the sudden "what makes you beautiful" comes on, you put the gun down, and shout at the top of your lungs "Yea! I AM beautiful!" Cool story, bro. I crie liek evrytiem.

Alan is a British gentleman. Whether or not he is beautiful is up to interpretation. *hides from Baustigt*

128-Uhh learn to take a fucking joke? He did it intentionally. And please save the bullshit. "Nobody in the world can sing better than them." Are you fucking serious? Let me give you a few names: Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, Christina Aguilera, Jackie E. (a ten year old opera singer), to name a few. Get out of your prepubescent blindfold stage.

No one I'm the world, huh? Have you ever heard jimi hendrix sing castles made of sand? What about guns and roses and sweet child of mine? Our how about the beatles, fool on the hill? All more meaningful songs; all better singers than 1d (and the ones I named were not even digitally enhanced)... believe me, I can name many, many more.

I apologize, that comment was meant for 126

I'm glad that their music was able to comfort you through some rough times, I truly am. But it still does not give you the right to degrade and curse at anyone who disagrees with you. Everyone has a right to their own opinion wether we agree with it or not, and I would hope that you would at least be mature enough to respect their opinion and be tactful with your argument just like everyone else has been thus far. No one has become angry or cursed to make their point except for you. Which shows a definite lack of the very thing you demand, respect. Everyone, including me, has been very calm and respectful with their comments. You know, I'm beginning to think you don't even know what that word means.

You know who you remind me of? That girl on YouTube that lost her shit when Kristen Stewart cheated on Robert Patterson. You tell us you have a life, and then you say shit like "they are my god, my religion"? You need to GET a life. You'll be really embarrassed with yourself when you look back at this. You sound pathetic. Guess what, sweetheart? They dont give two shits about you. They don't even know you exist.

You respect people that you've never met and have no clue you even exist over your parents? Wow.

You're welcome honey, but I am saddened to see that you are still missing my and everyone else's point here. You can like One Direction all you want, more power to you, but you don't need to throw a fit if someone else doesn't like them. And unless your parents are some sort of abusive perverts and all around horrible people, you really should respect them more. I seriously hope that one day, soon preferably, you finally understand my point.

God help you when they get older and the band breaks up. I'm not saying you can't respect them, but there is respect and then there is blind infatuation. You sound like a 12 year old 'beleiber'. You 'worship' a group of guys that are just as human as you and I. Honestly, it's sad. I sympathize with the fact that they helped you out of a dark time in your life, but there is a line, and you have vaulted over it. Nothing else to say.

146 - I might be misinterpreting your comments to some extent, but it seems like you're playing the role of the victim here, constantly reminding us how you've been through a lot of shit and attempted suicide. I don't question that you have, but please realize that others go through crap as well. It doesn't mean they have to have the same music taste as you or be affected so strongly by an artist. I'm glad you found refuge in one direction. However, I have to admit it reminds me a little of the time when I was 12, crying to Avril Lavigne music about how my crush didn't like me back. The lyrics in her and one directions songs are very simple - they don't require any analysis really and anyone could relate to them (which is part of the reason for their popularity) Now that my emotional understanding has grown I am listening to far more poetic songs, with far more complex meanings and emotions described than an unrequited crush or insecurity problems. But I guess I am in no place to evaluate your situation - I'm just hypothesizing here. I do like the message in one direction songs, it's just that they're extremely simple. Yeah, sorry for the rant. I got a bit off topic.

Ok, so you view them as deity, I have beliefs both religious and political, and those beliefs are very important to me. However, I have never cursed or thrown a tantrum when someone disagrees with me. Do you know what I do in that situation? I simply smile and say, "It's ok for you not to agree with me, that's your right and I respect that." And I just leave it at that. No need to go any farther or start yelling and arguing with them because I know that their beliefs are probably just as unshakable as mine are and there's no way I could ever convince them to think otherwise. Even if I could convince them to believe the same way as I do, I wouldn't try to do by yelling and cursing at them. That would just push them away and ruin any chances of changing their beliefs and growing a friendship.

People thought the Beatles, Backstreet Boys, NSync, Destiny's Child, and Jonas Brothers would never break up either. It happens. They're a fad. The only thing that brought them together in the first place was Simon Cowell on X Factor. I doubt it'll take much.

What was the FML again?

Priya, I swore I'd never get into a convo like this on here, but I have to. As someone who suffers from bipolar and was not able to get treatment until my mid 20's, I had many suicide plans and a few attempts growing up. When final fantasy 7 came out, I had everything planned. I was in the middle of a depression where I couldn't even function. I should have been hospitalized. I made a deal with myself that I'd finish the game first, hoping I could find help for the hopelessness that plagued me. I must have put over 300 hours into the game, doing all of the side stuff. I purposely wouldn't end it. I got help. I got better. I finished the game. So in a way, ff7 saved my life. I know how silly that sounds now, which is why I don't talk about it much. But even so, I don't get mad if someone calls the game a pos. everyone has their own opinions on things. I don't idolize the people who made the game. I look at it as what it was. Something to bury myself in until I got help. Even treated I have bad episodes. And I usually dump myself into games while working with my docs. But if you have tried suicide twice, I hope you are under a doctor's care. If not, get some professional help. Look up online support groups and maybe some local ones. It's ok to throw yourself into something to get through a rough time, just make sure you aren't expecting what you are throwing yourself into to make it all better because it won't.

Priya, hate to say this but if music could save you from suicide, you weren't that serious in the first place.

Teen Drama... Makes me smile!

ID is Homosexual, and totally Hates teenage Girls... In his latest interview he said, " do not, not kill yourself because of me...

Let me guess... Mommy wouldn't let you go to Homecoming? Whaaaaaa!!!

I remember when they came to my city for a concert. The little 13 year olds were running around dressed like little whores trying to get their attention. one of the band members tried to ask out our radio host who's in her thirties.... it was talked about for weeks.

You win the internet for this comment.

I had no clue who they even were so I just looked them up. So let me make sure I understand this, your Gods are some little boys that look like lesbians and sing and dance around? What are you going to do when they break up? And they WILL break up, it's inevitable, it happens to even GOOD bands, which 1D is FAR FROM!

Fucksakes everyone has their own taste in music if someone likes to listen to 1D its their choice if someone wants to listen to pink floyd or Beatles then they can, i hate when people fight over music taste if u like something listen to it, and if u don't simple as that just don't go bash other peoples music taste

This isn't about bashing anyone's taste in music. This is about a girl who's priorities are all fucked up. To respect a band more then her parents and to worship them like Gods and jump anyone's shit who disagrees with her is a bit different then not liking the band! They do suck and are just a fad, but that's besides the point here!

I'm asking for more thumbs down that priya is wishing for a orgy with those directionless band members with this comment, but after reading her comments I almost wish the radio stopped working before they could save her from that second attempt!

O yes, and Priya, they are going to break up! Probally soon too....well, hopefully soon!

There's a complete difference in liking a artist(s) and being horribly infatuated with them.

She wouldn't spend for the duct tape. Just keep the door locked until after the dance. Then her daughter will just drop out of school

This is the 2nd comment that you have said OP's daughter will drop out of school if she doesn't go to homecoming. I really don't think that's going to happen. She'll be mad & upset maybe. But drop out? No.

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You shouldn't have to be warned.

You really think getting good grades have to be spelled out for her? The kid is at least 14 or 15. I really doubt this should come as a big surprise.

No, I look beyond that and try to figure out why they have bad grades to being with. I don't expect the teachers to do the job that many parent should, which is take it one step farther and help a struggling child.

It sounds to me like she wouldn't be one to struggle, but instead one who just doesn't try.

First off, it's High School and the memories will soon fade and sadly so do most of the friends. Secondly, High School is no where near the best time of your life. That time is meant to teach you and prepare you for the next step in life(usually college). Lastly, people who usually think High School is the best time of their life, usually stay there and never get out.

Homecoming and all the other events in highschool were the most pointless shits people cared about. She'll live.

She's going to hold a grudge for the rest of this year. Be prepared.

The rest if her life

My mom almost did the same thing to me, but I convinced her that this was a milestone I couldn't miss. You should think of a different punishment, because she will never forget the year she didn't go to homecoming.

It's really not that big of a deal. I have only been twice - sophomore year and this year, my senior year. I don't think she will miss it much later on.

#23, I totally agree. I didn't go freshman year and almost didn't go this year (I'm a junior), and it didn't ruin my year. There are plenty of other things to look forward to in high school, especially graduation. :)

Yes that's true for some people, but I know I will never forget my homecoming. It was a wonderful day, and I'm so glad that my mom let me go, because its a great memory that ill always have.

I slipped most of my important high school events. In most cases I opted to work instead. I only went to prom because with my sister dropping out and getting her GED I knew my mom wanted to see one of her daughters go. She made a big deal out of picking out the dress together, doing my hair and make up. I did it more as a bonding time with her. The ones I skipped, I don't look back low, 20 years later, feeling like I missed a milestone.

I never went to any of my homecoming dances, and my school experience was just fine. There's always winter formal and prom, which are bigger anyways. OP's daughter will live, and I think the punishment is just.