Nice try, chief

By Anonymous - 04/04/2011 01:46 - United States

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
I agree, your life sucks 52 963
You deserved it 15 166

Same thing different taste

Top comments

That's when you whip out a sex toy and tell him "You first"!~

Joeyc524 0


Joeyc524 0
JacksonCampbell 9
kingtz 6

The boyfriend is awesome. Anal is definitely the best contraceptive!

He is awesome, I will strive to shape my future son to be like your boyfriend.

Pownzeez 0

I know. He's just assking to be called a moron.

you_freak 7

Could the boyfriend possibly be Charlie Sheen?

What a great Analogy, isn't? Is analogy a word? Darn my low english knowledge!

analogy is a word. Bird is also a word. it also happens to be "the" word. what were we talking about again?? oh yeah, cake.

Can you guess what song this quote is from? "Big dicks in your ass is bad for your health."

KiddNYC1O 20

Your song from personal experience?^

rebekahah 7

well, OP, it is an efficient form of brith control.

lsufootball 0

well OP should be careful on her period, I to can **** through mud you can **** through blood

nateb1tch 1

It's still possible to get knocked up though.

CommonSenseKarma 17

Wait, I thought some women shat their babies, how does anal help? You naïve interweb-ers and your illogical arguments.

women shit babies?! never heard that one before

John Lajoie a.k.a MC ****** can make you pregnant in your bum

cookies61889 15

that's cause his sperm is very super famous

oddball90210 0

I know several persons, who act and look like been born through this orifice...

I raises my rod in Egypt and split the red sea by that I mean I ha sex with a girl on her period thats right I don't mind ketchup on my hotdog as long as the bun is tight - Jon lajoie

hobojo11 0

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I don't get why guys want to put there dick in a girls ass. it's the home of shit and is suppose to be a one way exit.. eh bum virgin for life

No reason to have butt sex unless you're gay is what I say.

MissFukMyLuck 0

thank you all the men in the world who understand a dick in the ass is not pleasant!!! don't give it unless you want to receive it.

I don't remember it ever been uncomfortable...but then again...if my man can treat the vag right...I knew he could treat the bum right.

123 you're acting like 122 flew in from outer space because of the context of her comment... why? I mean, you just told everyone how great your man handles vaginas and assholes. shouldnt it be us directing a sarcastic comment toward you? oh wait...

Maybe she did fly in from outer space!!! Eh...Shouldn't knock something until its tried....properly...anyways. -.-

ktdad07 0

113 - You're ashamed of your own gender because a portion of men enjoy anal sex? That seems reasonable. There is so much stereotyping that takes place when people talk about anal. Not all dudes are into in. Not all chicks are against it. It's a personal preference, not something dictated by gender.

it takes a man to realize that anal is a form of birth control. he is indeed my hero

221 and your boyfriend are both my Heros now. Next to Leonard Nimoy of course.

xSgtTh0masx 0
cookies61889 15
Kriissttaa 0
ShadyFTW1 0

Next person to make a number comment is a ******* chode.

heehee, i was gunna till i saw ur comment ^ xD im no chaude

deadpool91 0

That's when you whip out a sex toy and tell him "You first"!~

s10biker 1

heck you might find his special spot...

DiamondFinish 0

Oh that's nastyyy. (In a Cleveland voice)

It's sort of a cruel joke that the make G-spot is in the butt.

YES agree with this 100% a man shouldn't ask to do his lady in the butt unless he's willing to take it too

creedaddict 9
RunnerDudeTyler 0

Well alright let's go lol be gentle

I said what what in the butt! I said what what in the butt! you wanna do it in my butt in my butt? let's do it in the butt ok...

do u no how much a ***** wud hurt up there it wud not b fun just let him bone her up the butt and do it that way!!!

Picking_Kuppies 0

Ginge, you're not very bright, are you?

hisgirlherboy 5
RunnerDudeTyler 0
siickman 7

nah beacause think about .. take up one hole might as well take it in the other and the guy shuld not have to unless tey are gay/ bi.

steffielynn 0

what makes you think the chick should have to?

DontBeACreeper 0
brighteyes81 0

So only women should have things they don't want shoved up their butt?! No one should do things they don't want to. You men saying the woman should but definitly not the man are obviously asshats.

RunnerDudeTyler 0

^ your right nobody should have to do what they don't want... If you want to give anal find a girl who likes it done push it on someone, or if she's the type to want to be even try something new and get her a strapon. haha

duravian 1

men getting anal is gay. men insert and women receive, one hole or another. guys do not receive. that's it. the end

hey_jeanette_fml 0

uh oh feminazi alert. some girls are into that and some aren't. get over it, bro

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whipmie87 0

I've heard of (known some) who have done this. it's not fool proof though. you can get pregnant just by it getting to the whoo-haa. watch some scrubs (and this time it is true, lol )

s10biker 1

no I'm sorry your wrong. you can not get pregnant in the butt. it's not medically possible

I'm not satisfied with that statement until rigorous and thorough testing is done.

This is the most stupid thing I think I've ever read on this site. Please tell me your kidding.

You do know it can drip or slide into her ****** and can cause pregnancy right? No you don't obviously.

That's why the chick wears a vaginal diaper to absorb any leakage there might be. Uh-doy!

how in the world is going anal gonna get a girl pregnant?

monnanon 13

Are you kidding me? thats like saying you will get pregnent if you use fingers that have come into contact with sperm. It is HIGHLU unlikely if it is at all possible. Its hard enough to get pregnant when sperm is where it should be what the hell makes you think sperm will survive the journey from the ass to the ******. You should not even be having sex without a condom so really all talk of dripping and other such nonsense is a moot point.

It is possible..and women CAN get pregnant from fingers with sperm on them into the vag. If its quick are such a f***ing idiot if you think not. If the semen is still wet..there is still LIVE sperm and it CAN survive outside of the body for up to 30 minutes outside of the body as long as it remains wet and isn't on something that is very 'cold' like a towel. You have GOT to be an idiot if you don't know shit, about how bodily fluids act. Vaginal fluids aren't only in the ******..but also all around it...and on the OH GUESS WHAT, the perineum or taint. Whichever term to prefer...or even know about...but guessing by your stupid response, I'm betting you'll probably have to google it. Sperm/Semen mixes with the Vaginal fluid even if there was NO vaginal intercourse and it CAN result in pregnancy. Yes the chances are EXTREMELY limited, but it can happen.

you_freak 7

Not to mention, sperm can travel up lube as well

@131 due to its acidity vaginal fluids are actually toxic/deadly to sperm cells. hence the reason the penis secretes lubricant or preseminal fluid to protect it would sperm be present after ejaculations without semen? I meant the sperm is still alive if the semen is wet. Thus.... even if you have cum on your hands..and wait a sec before sticking them in your vag...there is still a chance of pregnancy. Both the SEMEN and the SPERM are still present.

so THIS is why my girlfriend's getting fat. crud.

browncity23 0

leakage, dude. Besides, where do you think lawyers come from?

monnanon 13

@131 If you had actually read my full comment instead of flipping out because I didn't agree with you, you would have seen that I said its highly unlikely if it happens at all. What I mean by that is that yes in theory it can happen but that does not mean it will. Sperm have a hard enough time in the ****** without have the extra journey. Yes I do know all about vaginal fluids and shit like that I have been pregnant and i do know my body. As i also mentioned in my comment a condom should be used anyway so any dripping would not happen. People on this site seem to treat pregnancy as the enevitable outcome of any type of sexual contact unless it is stopped, in reality pregnancy can take forever when you are trying. @167 murpheys law is a good point, thats probably why there is so many couples trying for years with no baby and so many one night stand babies. No this comment isn't sarcastic I am agreeing with you.

you can NOT get preggers with anal. that's STUPID. it's like saying you can get pregnant through oral. wow, how young are you guys?????

293 - I'm 20, and well educated. I agree that it is POSSIBLE to get pregnant via anal sex if the circumstances are correct. I didn't say it was common or likely; it's simply possible.

well as people have already told you, it's not medically possible. secondly you must be one of those people who think you can get pregnant from a toilet seat. and third your "hoo haa" isn't meant to welcome 1 little drop of sperm, it would be killed immediately even if a little managed to make it's way in there. we all have a chance of being impaled through the head by a meteor at any time, but when does that ever happen?

angeleyes8675309 7

Wow… that's sounds so stupid but it's true wtf?

AlunKey 0

it's called bartering OP. if you'd kept at it you could have had him down to pulling out and a morning after pill.