Today, my boyfriend gave me serious shit because I couldn't name 10 Pokémon. He said he even considered dumping me. Glad to know he has his priorities straight. FML
KatzVKatz tells us more.
KatzVKatz 22
Hey, I didn't think this would get published, but here it is! Now for some explanations: 1. I did watch Pokemon when I was younger and I liked it. When he dared me to name 10 first gen Pokemon I was sure I could do it ... Guess my memory is not that good, but I already know that :D 2. He did admit eventually that he was sorta kinda joking. I knew he couldn't be serious about dumping me, but he did take the joke a bit too far, like yelling at me and sulking for half an hour. 3. I do take interest in his interests, we talk a lot about the games he plays and the series he watches, and do a lot of stuff together. We do have a lot in common. It's just that where he likes Pokemon to the point of fangirling about it, I'm the same with Harry Potter and Dr. Who. 4. I asked him to name ten spells from Harry Potter and he couldn't do it, so I guess we're even! Ha! :D
Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said, "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend to go to the airport with me, to see me off for my three-month stay abroad. He said no because the two-hour drive is "too boring". FML
Today, an attractive man hit on me for the first time since I ended my 3-year relationship with my cheating ex. Then the man told me he'd just gotten out of prison last week. FML
Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML
Today, after hours of waiting in line, I finally met my favorite band. After posing for a picture, I looked at my phone to find that instead of taking a picture with me and the band, my friend took selfies. FML
simply_meeeee tells us more.
I'm surprised mine got published! And yeah, I was furious with her. Consider her unfriended!
Today, I had lunch with an old friend I've had a crush on for years. We're both single, so I figured it to be kind of like a date. Until he started talking about how he told his brother last night that we would never be a thing. FML
Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting out, "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML
Today, I sent my long-distance boyfriend a heartfelt message about how much I missed him. He sent me back a picture of a Minion. FML
Today, my boyfriend didn't break up with me, but his mom did. FML
veryunluckygirl tells us more.
OP here. Let me explain a bit. I knew it take more than 300 letters to explain everything. He's 17. It was not his idea at all. We've figured out how to make this work out. But this is how it went, she told him that we could only be friends (and still hang out though) but if we continued dating she was going to call my mom and tell her that she knows that we've been having sex. My mom would have believed her so we decided to just tell his family that we are "just friends" we're still dating right now. But once he turns 18 it's not her decision to not let him leave anymore. In the past 9 months she said that she doesn't hate me. That it was just the "environment I live in" which I find extremely idiotic. I mean I live in a good home and with good people. But it's whatever. Once he's 18 he probably won't have anything to do with his parents though.
Today, my boyfriend told me I looked nice in my profile picture. I began to reply, "Aww, thank you!" until he sent another message saying, "Mostly because your face isn't in it." FML
Today, an old friend and I reconnected. Everything was going fine until he threatened to visit me at work. I didn't know he knew my place of employment, so I replied, "Do you know where I live too?" He answered, "Would you hate me if I did?" FML
Today, a woman left our first date just because I didn't like the same character as her on a TV show. FML
Today, the guy I've been dating for 3 weeks showed up at my house at 7 AM. I was about to give him a kiss when he said, "Good morning, is Sarah here?" I was confused until I realized he didn't recognize me because I had no make up on. FML
sarahxHx tells us more.
Hey it's OP. We stood there for a good 5 seconds until he realized it was actually me. He sincerely apologized and he said he hope it didn't offend me. He's a really nice guy and I'm happy to be dating him! :) We went hiking that morning. And for those saying I wear too much makeup on, I don't. I simply have super light eyebrows and eyelashes, and girls here would understand that doing your eyebrows and putting on black mascara makes a HUGE difference. For my face, I only wear a light coverage tinted moisturizer. You're all so quick to judge. SMH.
Today, I woke up and texted my girlfriend, "Good morning" like I do everyday. She responded with, "I'm dating somebody else". FML
Steve97 tells us more.
Hey this is OP. I didn't know this got posted until looking at the new fml's. This happened this weekend a few days after my birthday no less. Part of it is my fault I've been working hard doing two jobs to save up enough money to hopefully move in with her someday. But this left me with barely little time to spend with her and she took it as me losing interest in her so she started dating someone else without me knowing and I didn't find out until she admitted it hours after I texted her. I still talk to her and she does feel terrible but whatever. Thanks to everyone for the support and I'm just taking it one day at a time now.
Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML
Today, while walking home with my girlfriend we decided to take a shortcut in the woods. After hearing a huge noise, she pushed me and ran. FML
Today, my girlfriend heard a great quote about not letting anyone drag her down. She took it to mean, "break up with your boyfriend." FML
GoldCyclone tells us more.
GoldCyclone 21
To clear things up, I have been in love with her for 3 years, and we've been dating for 2 and a half. She's always seemed happy, and said that she wouldn't date someone she didn't have feelings for, which is why this came as such a shock to me.
Today, I received a break-up text while in a cramped car with my whole family. I had to choke back tears as we got stuck in traffic with the radio playing one love song after another. FML
Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years a few months ago, my boys convinced me to go out with the cute girl I had been talking to on Tinder. However, she wasn't cute, or a girl. He robbed me. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he thinks I'm cheating on him, with my brother. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend cheated on me with his boss so he could get a promotion and "provide" for us. This from the guy who made me quit my job because he said he made enough money to support us both. FML
Today, instead of canceling for the third consecutive time due to work-related reasons, my boyfriend sent his twin brother on our date. They both thought I wouldn't notice. FML
Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend how my mom died when I was 11 after crashing her car into a tree at night. He muttered "Women drivers." FML
Johnvris tells us more.
Johnvris 18
Yeah it sucks but he apologized for his insensitivity and we're still together.
Today, my boyfriend freaked out at me because he found a couple of orange hairs in my bed and he knows my ex is a redhead. He also knows I have two orange cats. FML
Today, I was finally going to break down my social barrier by going out on a date with a nice guy I recently met on a dating site. Just at the start of the date, he asked me how old I was, and out of pure nervousness, I blurted out, "12!" I'm 24. FML
Today, I once again asked my girlfriend about getting married, as she had previously said she would only get married once gay marriage was legal. She still said no. FML
Fgjvshnb tells us more.
Fgjvshnb 22
Consider her dumped!
Today, my boyfriend of 6 months was showing me his new phone. He accidentally opened his gallery, which contains 3 photos: one of his motorcycle, one of his new game console, and a naked photo of his ex. FML
Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I like, who also happens to be my coworker. She told my boss, and they're laughing about it as I type this. FML
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