Love, Relatable, Dating and First Dates: Must've been a good joke

Must've been a good joke

By HAIL SITHIS - 24/07/2015 18:54 - United States

Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said, "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 177

You deserved it 3 263

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/01/2011 23:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date for the first time in months. Over dessert, my date told a joke, and I tittered vigorously, causing me to choke and throw up all over my date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 112

You deserved it 6 345

Facts, feelings…

By Jimbob - 28/09/2020 17:01 - United States - Austin

Today, I went on a first date. It started out OK, but halfway through he began "debating" me, talking just like Ben Shapiro. I thought he was joking, or at least satirising the worst way you could talk during a date. I was wrong; he was serious. I'm still not sure what set him off, but I couldn't get a word in edgeways in after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 193

You deserved it 260

Bitch move

By Ineedtoshutup - 19/08/2021 16:01

Today, I went to the movies with this guy I'd started dating. During the movie, I thought it would be cool and funny to make sarcastic comments. When he dropped me off home, he told me that it was the worst date ever and to not talk to him again for being "annoying and obnoxious." FML

I agree, your life sucks 242

You deserved it 2 245

First Dates

By Anonymous - 06/06/2014 22:44 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for ages. Midway through the meal, he sighed and said, "I'll be honest, this is a horrible date. You got zero personality and I'm too lazy to do a window escape, so..." He then got up and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 415

You deserved it 10 168

Let down

By heartbreakkid21 - 14/05/2009 15:22 - United States

Today, I was on a date with this girl I actually like. The date was going really well and it seemed like it would be a good night. While in the movie theater, I went to hold her hand and instead she gave me a hand shake and said, "You're so funny, I'm so glad we're friends". FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 178

You deserved it 5 613

By Isitreallythatbad, - 22/12/2013 05:37 - United States

Today, I went to a local bar for a speed dating event. The first person I hooked up with took one look at my face, burst into laughter, and walked out of the bar practically doubling over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 527

You deserved it 3 646

Tonight, on First Dates…

By James C - 18/04/2012 08:48 - United Kingdom - Stoke-on-trent

Today, I was on a first date. She asked what I do, so I replied, "I create adverts." She then yelled, "F**k you" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 294

You deserved it 4 605

By perfectlybrokenx - 24/08/2010 04:21 - Canada

Today, while I was on a date, I noticed my ex-boyfriend in the restaurant, and he looked sad. So I walked over to see him and jokingly said, "You look like your mom died or something!" She had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 792

You deserved it 52 179

Nice dude

By ThroatSlasher - 17/08/2015 19:20 - United Kingdom - Grimsby

Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He's smart, attractive, and has a steady job. Imagine my surprise when he accepted. Then imagine my surprise when he followed up with, "Hah, just kidding. You're fucking BORING!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 986

You deserved it 2 456

Boo! Get better material!

By Anonymous - 22/03/2022 18:00 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I recently met. He was quite funny throughout our meal, so I came home and told my flatmate all about him and the stories he'd told me. My flatmate said, "Hang on…", pulled out his laptop, and showed me some videos. All my date's jokes were stolen from Ricky Gervais. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 002

You deserved it 144

Hildy93 21

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:43

Can you do a follow up and tell us the joke??

aliezzo 19

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:36

What an asshole. Screw him he doesn't deserve you op.

Comments

aliezzo 19

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:36

What an asshole. Screw him he doesn't deserve you op.

Nessco 36

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:44

Seriously, what was the joke?

EvilTurtle 35

Saturday 25 July 2015 9:20

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

Hunter_the_Ninja 22

Saturday 25 July 2015 10:17

Well, maybe he has known OP and always thought that she was a moron and that joke pushed him over the edge.

blakeyboy22 12

Saturday 25 July 2015 14:12

That's a rather large assumption from this FML

Zebediabolical 39

Saturday 25 July 2015 22:47

It depends on the joke. What if someone's best joke is a holocaust joke to a jewish person? What if it's a rape joke to someone who's been raped? Would that make a difference or is he still an asshole?

EvilTurtle 35

Sunday 26 July 2015 1:37

If your best joke is about the holocaust or about rape, then you're an asshole.

a1_z9 10

Sunday 26 July 2015 16:12

If someone told you a joke you found offensive, would your first thought be to do a massive arsehole show of finding it hilarious or would you just quickly take your leave?

RustlingSoul 26

Saturday 1 August 2015 0:29

Sreew him?

HurleyX21 17

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:36

He's the idiot for doing that, screw that guy.

DragonDude 24

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:36

Safe to say you dodged a bullet.

rieebee 23

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:36

Saved you finding out he's a jerk later on, at least he could have been polite about it. What a dick.

A_Net_70 7

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:37

Awwww what a jerk good thing you found out his true colors right away! Don't worry you will find your one :)

Ley135 20

Saturday 25 July 2015 8:37

I seriously can't believe half the things I read on this app. People are so cruel to one another. Screw him, Op. You'll find someone who loves your jokes and you even more.