By sheWontbeOnMyZombieApocteam - 12/07/2015 19:56 - United States - Killeen

Today, while walking home with my girlfriend we decided to take a shortcut in the woods. After hearing a huge noise, she pushed me and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks 26 091
You deserved it 2 873

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I recommend not taking shortcuts in the woods.

Rule #1 of a bear attack: You don't have to be the fastest, just not the slowest.


I recommend not taking shortcuts in the woods.

But that's how all the good stories start!

Why not? Life without adventures is boring.

U mean x girlfriend right ? I joke, I joke, calm your Tits

HighasaCloud 46

Why not choose the route that lets you exit the woods as fast as possible? From OP's wording, it sounds like he was already in the woods before he decided to take a shortcut.

Wandering through the woods? You're lucky you only got pushed over, last time I saw people wandering through the woods in a movie, they wound up joined at the digestive system!

bryce0110 23

She just left you in the dirt? FYL

She did you dirty

Rule #1 of a bear attack: You don't have to be the fastest, just not the slowest.

In that case being slow just might save from being mutilated.

97mailo 17

In this case she did have to be the fastest, because there were only 2 of them

Seems like you need to have a talk with your girlfriend.

So what? You're mad she beat you to it? Man should defend a woman. Unless you both know it's not gonna happen and both retreat. Of course there's some women that have to defend a man.

hannahgrac3 12

This is the most stupid, sexist thing I have ever heard. Please shut up.

YourOpinionSucks 22

#29 you're a dipshit, and I feel like explaining why would just go directly over head.

Really. Then you all are *******. A man should take care of his women if a person or animal comes at them. If you disagree you are a bitch and should run. Yes women are equal yada yada but it's true most men are more powerful and should defend their women. You all are like the rest of america and are afraid to hurt someone's feelings. Same problem with our country.

YourOpinionSucks 22

I'm all for protecting my woman, but when she goes out of her way to make sure I receive harm instead of her, then let's say she will get her equal rights, and equal lefts.

Me more powerful man, me defend woman from noise in woods. Me drag her back to cave. Oh please. There wasn't even a threat; loud noises happen in the woods, trees fall. Anyways, girl could clearly take care of herself. Chill, we get it, you're a tough manly man.

Your point which isn't what I was trying to make first of all. The point is that a man should protect their girlfriend, wife, female from harm. It's called chivalry. Apparently not many men have these days from what I see. And the women that trash talk are the first ones to slam a man if he didn't protect her. If the role was reversed in this fml then women would be bashing the man for running. Can't have it both ways.

Actually I'd be pissed off of me and my partner didn't fight the evil imaginary threat together. He would shoot it in the face with our homemade flame thrower whilst I'd run behind it and set a trip wipe so it'd fall over and then we could escape together as equals. Boom.

And now I know your just an idiot.

Oh and I think same sex marriage is a disgrace. It's wrong and shouldn't be allowed. Marriage is a bond between a man and woman. Now let the flood of comments begin 3,2,1.... Carpet munchers and pole puffers

Did you survive?!?! I'm joking, but Fyl anyway :/

Hey, look at the bright side! Next time it happens you know what to expect. Counter-attack that selfish human being (didn't wanna call her a bitch).

So very thoughtful haha. But really, people can react impulsively under terror or flight/fight situations.

True, I'm very flightly and would leave my friends in the dust if something scares me. I remember one time I was in a small cave tunnel with a friend and I was in front and she was crawling behind me. Heard a sound that sounded like claws scratching and I hightailed it out of there.

Well running away is fine imo, since (as you said) it's instinct. But pushing her bf into dangers way is cowardly, selfish and just plain douchy. F his life.