All the FMLs

I'm already on a ton of medication anyways. I'm trying to find a balance between too much and too little salt, it's just tricky. My doctor is usually pretty helpful, more so that others I've seen. My health issues are just kind of complex so it's a handful trying to keep it all under control.

to clarify, she never heard the song. I practiced maybe a half hour a day for about a week, usually at night after she'd gone home.

OP here - wow, it's weird and awesome this made it on the site! Here is some follow-up info: my doctor suggested I take the pics to see if the hemorrhoids were getting worse. I'm a new mom, so I guess sleep deprivation explains why I forgot about the Dropbox account. :)

OP here. Firstly for those who automatically assumed my coworker was a male, you've made an ass out of you and supposedly me too. Secondly for those saying that they shouldn't have done the Heimlich maneuver and should have hit me on the back.. You've again made assumptions based on a lack of information. Unfortunately you are limited to the amount of characters your FML can be composed of so I had to leave out details. My coworker she first asked me if I could breathe, when I shook my head no, she gave a few thrusts with her palm to my back between the shoulder blades and when that failed to dislodge the candy she told me she was going to perform the Heimlich maneuver and I nodded and when she did she got it out in the first try thankfully and my ribs I think are still a bit tender from, I'd guess, bruising. And to those that said thankfully I'm alive.. Thanks, I am glad I am too even though cleaning up wasn't something I was glad about!

OP here, all of the suggestions saying go to a higher up are great, but the only reason I can't do that is because it's a family owned restaurant. I am the assistant manager and I've been working there for almost a year; I've only called out twice. My bosses are the owners son and nephew. There's not much I can do about the situation other than leave the job as this isn't the first time they've left early while I closed the restaurant. Thank you all for the concern about my grandmother. She is doing alright now and she's stable.

OP here - I'd like to say it's funny how the first ever fml I posted got here, but anyway. As a point of clarification, the grocery store I work in is kind of like a Walmart, but more centered around food with a bit of clothes and shit like that. Basically the store is ******* huge. It's not unlikely to be able to walk the store and not see another employee on the floor who would be able to help. And what she needed was on the opposite side of the store to the bathroom. Yeah....luckily I only told my manager and she let me go home and clocked me out so I could just ditch. I haven't gotten any looks from coworkers so I may be in the clear