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Today, I started some laundry late at night. Once my clothes were in the washer for about a half hour, I got bored and I decided I would listen to my iPod. After looking for it for another 15 minutes, I remembered where I'd left it; in my jacket... which is now nice and clean. FML

#13469252
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12665) - you deserved it (25945)

On 10/16/2010 at 5:57am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was having a romantic conversation with my boyfriend under the stars. He said, "You know how there are people who are beautiful on the inside and people who are beautiful on the outside? Yeah, well you're one of those 'inside' people." FML

#13468876
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34756) - you deserved it (4448)

On 10/16/2010 at 4:20am - love - by Annie - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I was on an airplane that was experiencing some turbulence. Feeling anxious, I reached over and grabbed my husband's hand for comfort. He then said, "Why are you scared of dying? You're not even pretty." FML

#13468251
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42944) - you deserved it (4054)

On 10/16/2010 at 2:44am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 4 year old son told his preschool teacher that his daddy could pick up 10,000 cows but couldn't pick up his mommy because she was too heavy. I'm the mommy. FML

#13467728
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30100) - you deserved it (5933)

On 10/16/2010 at 1:50am - kids - by princessj - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned that making an illegal U-turn right after you see a cop doing one will not stop said cop from ticketing you. FML

Today, while working at the bakery, I slipped on a pen. I dropped the pie rack I was holding full of pies right on my face. I now have a burn mark on my cheek that looks like a swastika. FML

#13466865
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30507) - you deserved it (3120)

On 10/16/2010 at 12:41am - work - by hannahj88 - Australia

Today, my perfectly sane and healthy 90 year old grandmother had a heart to heart with me. She told me she'd pay for a boob job. When I asked why, she said, "Sweetie, you'll never attract someone with those tiny suckers." FML

#13466592
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31960) - you deserved it (3852)

On 10/16/2010 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML

#13466468
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44004) - you deserved it (3675)

On 10/16/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Shooter71 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got grounded because I didn't go to my dog's birthday party. FML

#13465366
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34228) - you deserved it (7296)

On 10/15/2010 at 11:06pm - misc - by jacky tu - United States (California)

Today, it's my birthday. My dad was supposed to take me to get a tattoo, but instead he went to the bar, got drunk, and told me how I was the biggest mistake he and my mom have ever made. FML

#13464373
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33677) - you deserved it (3665)

On 10/15/2010 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was told I look like Susan Boyle. FML

#13462690
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38005) - you deserved it (5705)

On 10/15/2010 at 7:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to class with my bag packed for a weekend trip when it began to vibrate violently. Stopping mid-lecture, the professor approached me and asked politely if I could turn off my cell phone as I was disturbing the other 150 pupils in the class. It was my personal vibrator. FML

#13462188
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11666) - you deserved it (45062)

On 10/15/2010 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my mother gave me an early Christmas present; a Bissell mop so I can "do a better job" when I "clean her floors". FML

#13462104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24919) - you deserved it (3775)

On 10/15/2010 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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