Miscellaneous: Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began...

By jennyygrace - 11/07/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 610

You deserved it 41 652

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By sufia - 29/09/2016 11:14 - Pakistan

Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 353

You deserved it 1 170

By Anonymous - 17/07/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 663

You deserved it 47 213

By GothicbunnyxC - 28/01/2012 23:31 - Canada

Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 666

You deserved it 35 464

TSA

By androgynous - 30/03/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 568

You deserved it 4 756

Checked out

By Anonymous - 21/09/2019 16:01

Today, at work, an old lady was staring at my crotch a lot. I looked down, thinking maybe I had an open fly. I didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 408

You deserved it 178

By thebickster - 06/03/2009 17:58 - United States

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 573

You deserved it 49 770

By roo - 27/01/2011 16:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting a flight home. I'd worn a belt because my skirt was too big. When I walked through security, they asked me to remove my belt. My skirt fell down in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 937

You deserved it 13 425

By muffintop - 11/07/2011 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 186

You deserved it 13 575

Never joke with TSA

By missy - 16/06/2011 02:42 - United States

Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 025

You deserved it 10 115

By Anonymous - 02/04/2011 21:05 - United States

Today, while shopping, I was grabbed and dragged off to a security room with no warning. Apparently, the way I was dressed and walking was suspicious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 531

You deserved it 5 067

doomking10 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:02

Here's a tip: Stop being stupid.

chocolaterabbit 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 9:55

how else was he meant to show you that your fly was down? you should've tried to understand what he was doing before you call him lewd.

Comments

chocolaterabbit 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 9:55

how else was he meant to show you that your fly was down? you should've tried to understand what he was doing before you call him lewd.

pigscantswim 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 6:00

by saying so discreetly?

doomking10 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:02

Here's a tip: Stop being stupid.

fml__love 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:14

Haha YDI, think things through first.

Lonely_Lez 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:16

From the username I think OP is female.

yourmysunshine 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:17

it does say jennygrace... i'm sure it's a girl,

kyle_kbo20 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:38

so what girls have flys on there pants too.

kaysi_28 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 22:15

girls wear jeans ya know.. and shorts.. and tons of other pants that require zippers

Phallus_fml 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:41

Give him a head, stupid.

soulfhood24 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:43

this is retarded

IDoNotHaveAIDS 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 10:57

YDI it for being an ignorant asshole. Seriously, what does everybody expect that everything is some sort of sick gesture? I mean, why would an airport security guard do that without having good intentions?

Finnboghi 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 20:42

Indeed. Don't be so full of yourself and you may notice that the world doesn't really care about you. Not everything anyone does symbolizes that they want to do something sexual with you.

ddlovatolover 23

Friday 22 August 2014 13:15

Two girls working in airport security once had a male celebrity walk through the machine that sees you nude, printed the picture and asked him to autograph it. You never know. (They were charged since the incident, btw.)