The Top

Holy crow after 7 years I finally get posted! Even though it was on an email I never use.. But I thought I would share a little somethin somethin with you guys. I have tried ear plugs but they cause blockage in my ears. Also to the people who say I shouldn't let the dog sleep with us. Have you tried keeping a 1 year old pit with seperation anxiety in a kennel or simply out of the room? You can pick up the tattered remains of my living room. It's just one of those things you gotta deal with when you have a SO and a dog that snorts loud even when awake. PS I snore loud as **** too my boyfriend is just a heavier sleeper! :D

Time for Family Counseling?

By "asperix" - 18/07/2017 15:50

Today, my drunk brother told me he has an incest fetish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 277

You deserved it 724

asperix tells us more.

asperix 20

Tuesday 18 July 2017 0:52

alright, so i posted this about 5 minutes after he told me at a party. the day after he explained that hes kinda in love with my sister-in-law and thats what drunken him means by incest fetish. i know that she also have feelings for him... not sure wether i should help them or run away.

By in love with an idiot - 20/11/2016 11:47 - Angola - Luanda

Today, my soon-to-be husband showed up with an animal print suit at our engagement ceremony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 274

You deserved it 1 660

By bob7654 - 11/11/2016 02:44 - United States - Arlington

Today, my parents asked me if my girlfriend of two years and I wanted to go see a musical with them. I haven't told them that she broke up with me the day after she met them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 274

You deserved it 2 122

Close encounter

By magicalDEATH - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I flew a toy helicopter into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 273

You deserved it 35 739

By wishihadpockets - 28/01/2010 10:24 - United States

Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 270

You deserved it 43 279

By oldtexas - 13/08/2009 07:27 - United States

Today, I bought a freezer mug that looks like it's full of water. I've been playing tricks on my friends by throwing the empty cup at them. After doing this a few dozen times, my 83 year-old mother came to visit. I played the same trick on her. The joke's on me. My Dad filled the cup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 269

You deserved it 67 519

By GTA_VI - 01/12/2016 01:02

Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of an unresolved issue, the dealership mistakenly reported the rental vehicle I'm using in the meantime as stolen. The police surrounded my work as I was meeting with a potential client. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 269

You deserved it 569

GTA_VI tells us more.

GTA_VI 0

Monday 5 December 2016 0:37

OP here. I had to stay where I was while the police talked to the dealership to get it sorted out. Once they realized I had the keys and the paperwork, they let me go. The dealership said this has never happened before and they're going to make it right by fixing my car for free as well as detailing and oil change.