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I just want to give more of an insight of the events surrounding the bailiff intrusion. A couple of weeks prior to finding them in my kitchen, I received a letter from an electricity company, which was intended for another customer. I contacted the electricity company to inform them I had received a letter for someone else, and they assured me that they would rectify their mistake. Fast forward a fortnight - I found bailiffs in my kitchen. They had picked the lock to gain entry, and had a search warrant, which they claimed gave them the right to enter my home. However, once I told showed them my I.D. and informed them their search warrant was invalid since I wasn't who they were looking for, they soon left. It baffles me how they could say it was so easy to open my front door, when they'd opened it with locksmith tools. I'm definitely going to have to improve my home security to avoid another incident like this.

By oncehipjr - 03/10/2014 19:04 - United States - Dallas

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 433

You deserved it 4 550

You OK, dude?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, during a review session for a botany class, I began to space out. Then, I started to go, "Beep, beep, beep, beep." I stopped when I noticed the entire class staring at me as if I were insane. This was not the first time this had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 490

You deserved it 37 328

They weren't wrong...

By aginglikemilk - 14/03/2017 18:00

Today, I had a customer tell me that I don't look a day over 39. I'm 35. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 070

You deserved it 459

By Pool-less - 04/09/2011 06:09 - United States

Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 082

You deserved it 2 394

By verycre8tive - 21/05/2009 07:31 - Romania

Today, after a few drinks my dad decided to tell me the story of how I was born. He wanted a baby girl after my brother, and mum didn't want any more children. So he tricked her by giving her the wrong pill. That should explain a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 653

You deserved it 2 733

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 329

You deserved it 3 868

Be more specific

By readytoamputatemyfeet - 30/06/2013 23:00 - United States - Winter Springs

Today, my shoe fell apart a few minutes after I got to work. I called my boyfriend and asked him to bring me the "pretty black pair" in my closet. What did he bring? Black stilettos. I'm a waitress with an eight-hour shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 565

You deserved it 32 211

Epic prank bro

By Rachel - 20/07/2012 05:13 - United States

Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 971

You deserved it 3 591

By ryanlogan - 31/08/2011 06:31 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend will only speak to me using Lady Gaga lyrics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 669

You deserved it 5 710

By upset mom - 24/04/2019 04:00

Today, during a meeting, the president of the honor society apologized for being out for a couple of days due to the flu, and wanted to get everything back on track. I mumbled that she hadn't shown good leadership by being out. I guess she heard me, because she said, “Neither does being a teen mom.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 618

You deserved it 6 349

Relatable

By ayeayeboy19 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was watching "My Strange Addiction". The woman featured ate rocks. While judging her weird habit, I realised I was chewing on a coat-hanger the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 134

You deserved it 14 488

By o_O - 23/06/2013 17:26 - United States - Bowling Green

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 325

You deserved it 4 152

By LuxTheSarcastic - 06/11/2015 23:05 - United States - Apex

Today, my mother dragged me to the mall to get me out of the house and to get me to stop using my phone. She then spent the whole trip talking on her phone instead of actually interacting with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 971

You deserved it 2 370

By Anonymous - 11/05/2019 02:00

Today, I noticed a spot on my leg that I wanted a closer look at. I went to put my phone screen towards it for more lighting while my sister was in front of me, looking. I'm pretty sure she saw my nude that I forgot was on the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 2 398

By thisbethed - 02/11/2015 22:26 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boss made up a rumor that I was quitting my job so I wouldn't get the promotion that was coming up. There goes that raise I've been wanting for six months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 989

You deserved it 1 558

No help wanted

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Portland

Today, I saw a customer wandering around, looking confused. I went over and kindly asked if I could help him find anything. He said no, but that he'd help me find the teeth he'd knock out of my mouth if I didn't get lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 829

You deserved it 3 397

By Username - 21/08/2011 09:59 - United States

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 979

You deserved it 7 936

By ch4nny - 29/08/2014 01:47 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 273

You deserved it 5 694

Curb your expectations

By Academia - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I got accepted into University, onto a course I don't want to do, but my parents said they would disown me if I didn't go. I believe them, since they haven't spoken to my shop assistant sister in about three years now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 370

You deserved it 3 097

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 014

You deserved it 2 964

Today, I was driving with my parents while explaining that young people like myself are better drivers because we have better reflexes. My explanation was suddenly interrupted with the sound of me crashing the car against a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 195

You deserved it 50 742

Today, I was Whatsapping my boyfriend, as I am away for work. Before talking to him, I texted my work group I wasn’t feeling well after they invited me out. As I was chatting with what I thought was my boyfriend, I said, “I want your penis inside me.” And then realized I'd texted my work group. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 317

You deserved it 3 783

Today, I went clubbing. A girl I was dancing with leaned in with a disgusted expression and said, "God, it stinks! Someone keeps farting… I swear they've got IBS." It was me. I have IBS. I was farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 501

Today, I discovered that I'm allergic to band-aids. I now have a band-aid shaped rash around a tiny cut on my leg. Oh the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 199

You deserved it 4 079

Today, my anus has given up the ghost. Now if I vomit, have a violent coughing fit, or orgasm too intensely, I will shit myself. Even if I have absolutely no gas or need to go. I'm scared to leave the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 139