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he kept the fare running for the fifteen minutes I was standing there bent over in pain from having my ribs near broken, it cost me more than it would have to go home, I then had to pay for the hospital bill, all because he ran a red light.

By anonymous - 10/06/2009 22:50 - United States

Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML

agreeclassic 45 757

vote type 1 4 679

By lolmyfduplife - 24/12/2015 06:10

Today, I put my 5 month-old daughter in her swinging chair and walked into the kitchen to make her a bottle. When I came back, she was giggling because the dog was licking her face. It would have been cute, picture worthy even, if I actually had a dog. FML

agreeclassic 24 707

vote type 1 2 100

By HT BaaFly - 07/09/2011 15:08 - United Kingdom

Today, after months of unemployment, my only social interaction was with my postman. FML

agreeclassic 23 249

vote type 1 5 418

By Anonymous - 14/06/2014 10:11 - United States - San Jose

Today, my mom found out that I've been having counselling behind her back for the past 4 years. I broke down in tears explaining everything. Her response was, "So you go and bitch about me behind my back?!" And she wonders why I'm depressed. FML

agreeclassic 53 758

vote type 1 5 635

By dumped - 23/08/2015 10:22 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I told my friend about a fight I had earlier with my girlfriend. He thought it'd be funny to use my phone while I was in the bathroom and text her "ure such a cunt". She wouldn't believe the truth, even when my friend confessed to her. She thought I paid him to take the fall. FML

agreeclassic 24 512

vote type 1 2 484

By typical - 13/04/2013 23:49 - United States - Cheshire

Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML

agreeclassic 48 262

vote type 1 4 159

Too good to be true

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Lafayette

Today, I was walking when I saw a quarter. I bent down to pick it up. Barely a foot ahead there was another, so I crawled over to get it. This continued for about six feet when I realized a kid was laying them out in a trail. I'd collected 7 fake quarters and the kid had it on video. FML

agreeclassic 46 074

vote type 1 22 155

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

agreeclassic 32 137

vote type 1 9 474

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

agreeclassic 50 712

vote type 1 5 225

Today, my phone randomly stopped working and I have three phone interviews. FML

agreeclassic 501

vote type 1 67

Today, it's been a few days since I had surgery, which means I can’t wash my hair myself for a couple of weeks. Today I paid to have it washed professionally… then proceeded to spill liquid glucose all over the ends of my hair. FML

agreeclassic 303

vote type 1 124

Today, I woke up and remembered that I'm in law school. Now, I'm about to go to sleep, and I'm still in law school. FML

agreeclassic 320

vote type 1 1 020

Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML

agreeclassic 74 830

vote type 1 3 669