By True Story - 29/08/2011 12:46 - Canada

Today, it's been a year since I've been with my girlfriend, and I think that I hate more things about her than I like. For instance, how she likes to throw furniture at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 081
You deserved it 10 256

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Get something bigger and slap her with it!


rein 8

that's what you get when you date the hulk's girlfriend.

Your soon to be Super Ex-Girlfriend?

That would be worse for the girlfriend, not OP.

hook_em 0

I bet she yelled hulk smash while throwing the furniture

If this is happening after a year imagine what's going to happen in ten!

She's a keeper.

Maybe you guys will have a kid and then she'll throw that at you

A pillow I wouldn't mind, but uh, does she throw sofas and tables? Then yikes.

xDefendPopPunkx 14

Go ahead and break up with her. But do it in football pads or something as a precaution. If she throws furniture when you're dating, what will she throw when you break up? Knives? Be safe friend.

You need to use the 5 d's of a relationship. Dodge, dip, dive, duck, and dodge! If you can dodge her for a year you should be able to dodge a sofa!

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

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SteelCladAngel 0

What are you a ******* pussy? It's not that hard to pick up a little end table or a kitchen chair...which are both considered "furniture" Small computer desks also fall under this category, as do plastic lawn chairs. Yes I'm a female, yes I sometimes need help with heavy lifting, but no, I won't pretend I can't lift small furniture because my husband might think it 'cute' that I'm 'so weak' And guess what? I'm not a half man or 'beast' I'm 5'2" and a /tight/ 130 pounds when I'm not pregnant.

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Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

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RainbowHeadache 2

You sound like you're bragging about your fancy furniture. Lol I'm 5'2 and 8 months pregnant but I move things heavier than 50 pounds with ease. (which is safe if you lifted this much regularly before pregnancy. My doctor even told me so.) not sure what being pregnant has to do with what you guys are talking about. Being a woman is no excuse. The pickle jar thing is kind of pathetic though but I see where you're coming from with the furniture. Lifting is one thing, throwing is another.

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

107- I am not sure where pregnant came into it, she mentioned her weight while not pregnant? Which is obviously nit going to be the same during pregnancy lol. When pregnant I was not allowed to even lift something overran pounds but I was high risk. No, I am not braying about fancy furniture, I am sorry if it sounded that way, my mistake. I tried to word it in a way that was not so long and I should have explained why I was saying it, my apologizes. What I was trying to say is that the furniture I do have is made of heavy meterial.(couches, chairs, dinning table, side tables, bookcases, beds, dressers, etc.) I chose not to have a lot of furniture because I don't find it nessisary and what I do have I want to last for a long time. If you find something made of particle wood it would be lighter but it wouldn't last as long as solid wood does. Since I don't find the need for a lot of decorative furniture I am able to invest in solid wood. I am unsure of the difference that it makes when considering we are not only talkig about lifting it but throwing since I do not purchase particle wood furniture. I know it makes a bit of a difference but when lifting but idk about throwing. Personally I don't find particle wood and less "fancy" then solid wood, the only difference I see is in durability. You can by some unappealing furniture in both solid and particle wood so I don't think the material matters in that comparison, from my perspective of course. The only comparison I was trying to point out is that stronger material is generally heavier(not always of course). It could also be the type of wood I like(oak). I like stinger material so my furniture would be a lot heavier then someone's of a lighter wood. And for the patio furniture, metal is going to be heavier then plastic chairs. When I originally commented I did not think to put in what type of furniture I am talking about lifting, then someone said end tables, plasic furniture, etc. I don't own that so I did not come to mind as I don't see it everyday as I do my heavy-to-lift furniture. Maybe she does have smaller(not nessisarally less fancy or of different quality, just smaller) pieces of furniture, or of a lighter wood(not nessisarly less fancy or smaller), or maybe she has both. What I was tryig to point out is that I could not do that with my furniture which is of a heavy wood and large in size all around. I don't have any furniture that would be easy for any woman to lift and throw at someone unless that woman regularly benchpressed or worked her upper body muscles in order to lift heavier things. I only tone, I do not need to lift and I choose not to if I do not have to. That is my choice and I am happy with it no matter if it is perceived as cute or "pussy"-like. Not to say I dot have floor lamps, potted plants, etc. That could be thrown at someone but that is not furniture that is decorations and lighting.

32- well I guess there are to many Bruces around, so I changed my picture. 110- no need to write a book about your wood.

12, Care to explain how?

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

112- that was awesome!! Good play on words. I wouldn't have thought that there would have been a need but I guess my comment was perceived as bragging so I clarified the context in which it was originally meant.

37 - She'll probably being throwing houses at him by then.

Your relationship is dangerous, and will NOT improve. Get out of it NOW. NEVER, NEVER put up with physical abuse of yourself, or your children. Deal breaker. Call the cops, and then a lawyer. PLEASE NOTE: Most guys who are married 20+ years realized a long time ago that there is a lot of shit we hate about our wives. But there is a lot of stuff we love too. That's life. When your spouse knows virtually every fault, secret, and flaw you have.... and still accepts you, that is love. And you stay with that one.

idontcare8l 3

110 - um hello wut types of metal , i just got my bowl of popcorn ready for your coment

As charlie sheen says never give a girl something that you wouldnt want thrown at your head. teddy bear=good steak knives=bad

Get something bigger and slap her with it!

Does your girlfriend happen to be steve wilkos?

Like his dick!!! No, wait. That wouldn't work...

Actually It's going to work and it will hurt if you do the helicopter

ppatty 0

epic 28

Chaos187 6

Get the ***** cannon from jackass 3D and shoot it at her furniture throwing ass.

How about Kanye West's ego?

Spade606 6

I see now why it has been a year since you last saw her

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4 did read it right....or else I read it wrong also...?

chickenwalrus 14

38, i know the "school system is pitiful" but learn to take a joke dude haha

Thats a easy problem to fix...

Yes, that would be a good reason to hate her.

Break up...the longer u wait the worse it gets!

BoredomCentral 8

I think it's time to get the f**k out of there and dump that crazy woman.

I agree women only get worse after you show them weakness

jessesgirl14 16

Leave the bitch or kick her a$$ out! Trust me-- it only gets worse!!!

Your picture fits this FML. SO, DON'T CHANGE IT!

pippacrawford 4

Lol, I love your picture. Perfect fit for this FML. And my ex, too, come to think of it haha =P

Time to throw out this relationship.