Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML
by Jackassed / 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
spazticechidna's comment : Good for him for being able to stay in better relationships then you.
Today, I was riding my long board. A few feet from me an attractive girl was riding one too, in the same direction. We made eye contact right as I slammed into a light pole. She then fell because she was laughing so hard. FML
by TheNerd / 05/11/2011 at 10:01pm / United States (California) / Love
PSQ91's comment : You just fell for her.
Today, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus. More specifically, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus from being hit in the face by a pigeon that was deflected from the windscreen of a van moving at about 35mph. FML
by pigeons_suck / 05/11/2011 at 5:17pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by jamalinho / 05/11/2011 at 1:51pm / Bangladesh (Dhaka) / Work
by Anonymous / 05/11/2011 at 1:34pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Animals
by Anonymous / 05/11/2011 at 1:32pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
kamikrazy's comment : Who doesn't love tic-tacs?
Today, I was auditioning for a talent show. I asked my girlfriend if I could sing to her before I went. She said sure. Thirty seconds in, she got up and mumbled, "You're only going to embarrass yourself." FML
by NotChadKrouger / 05/11/2011 at 11:19am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/11/2011 at 10:33am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- Today I got a question from a guest at work. I work as a scenic tour pilot and our airplanes have a… Today, I was trying to avoid one of our dogs while driving down the drive. Instead I crashed into a… Today, I was talking to a boy I'm interested in and tried to make conversation while taking a sip…