The Top

Wow, forgot there are so many 100% perfect people out there who have never made a stupid mistake in their lives! This was a momentary lapse of judgement that resulted in a pretty minor accident, that being the first and only I’ve had in 20+ years of driving. I was not driving drunk, speeding or doing anything overly reckless. I was eating. Silly mistake, yes. Don’t know if it really warrants the nasty comments.

I hate hiking now

By Anonymous - 04/04/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I was trying to take a cute selfie on a hiking trip. As I leaned against a boulder to get the perfect shot, a squirrel jumped out of nowhere and attacked me, probably thinking I was after its food. I dropped my phone into a creek, and my friends took a picture of me freaking out instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 437

Damaged ego

By Anonymous - 30/07/2024 16:00 - India - Ernakulam

Today, I was selected for a big quiz and was teamed with a girl who I have a huge crush on. When we reached the venue, I tried to hop onto the stairs and I faceplanted onto the stairs and nearby event organisers had to come pick me up. After that, I couldn't look her in the eye, nor answer the quiz questions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 509

Ambition

By Anonymous - 14/02/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I saw my ex, who had dumped me for not being “ambitious” enough. I'd said she was just a gold digger and would die alone. She looked amazing at the fanciest, most expensive restaurant in town, and was celebrating being made partner at her law firm. I was bussing tables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 877

Spurt

By Anonymous - 24/01/2026 00:00

Today, while I was trying to put my high fluoride toothpaste on my toothbrush, I miscalculated the pressure and ended up squirting a massive glob all over the bathroom cabinet and a rug that was on the floor. My stepmom says if we can't get the bleach stain out of the brown rug, I'm going to have to replace it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 314

Better safe than soggy

By Anonymous - 11/04/2026 09:00 - United States - Canton

Today, after thinking I was done with my diarrhea because my last fart was a dry one, I let loose with what was gonna be a good fart. It wasn’t. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 367

Stranger danger!

By Anonymous - 26/09/2024 16:00 - United States - Flagstaff

Today, I hugged a man I thought was my dad at the airport. It wasn't my dad. The man’s actual family stood nearby, watching me cling to their father for a solid 5 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 399

The end

By Anonymous - 07/06/2026 20:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, while trying to document another unfair incident, as well as suspected fraud in my toxic work environment, I accidentally replaced months of text in my document with a single period. Cloud backup saved over the actual note I needed. Months of diligence gone and I'll probably continue to be stepped on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 308

This needs clarification

By wrongdecisions - 05/07/2022 16:00

Today, some guy I’ve been talking to showed up at my house while I was on video call with my boyfriend. I had to confess to a stupid situation I had no business being in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 1 793

Bonus

By Anonymous - 18/12/2025 22:00

Today, I finally got a bonus virtual gift card in my email that was thrown in for buying a new mattress. Except I've never used a virtual gift card before, I only have the vaguest idea as to how to use it. I actually googled how to use it because I was so clueless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 252

Miscommunication

By Leighton on C - 03/03/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was texting my crush and I wanted to send him a cute emoji to show I was thinking of him. Instead of sending the "heart eyes" emoji, I hit the "poop" emoji. The worst part? He responded with, "Yeah, I'm a piece of shit, thanks for reminding me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 393

Fun fun fun

By But I love sex - 21/08/2025 03:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, I asked my boyfriend why we never have sex anymore. He said, "Honestly, you lie there with your arms balled up against your chest, you don't moan or give any indication that you're enjoying things. It makes me really uncomfortable." FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 1 095

I'm gonna head out

By Shirlz - 22/12/2025 15:00

Today, I answered a question in a meeting that wasn’t directed at me. I spoke for way too long before realizing everyone was silent because the question had actually been rhetorical. My boss nodded slowly and moved on. No one mentioned it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 349

Policy of truth

By WalkofShame101 - 04/06/2023 22:00

Today, my parents took the car I was supposed to get for my graduation back. Note to self: Don’t fall asleep at your friend Diane’s house past curfew. PS: Don’t lie about being at Diane’s, because they called her mom, who said I wasn’t there. I was actually at my boyfriend’s apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 1 905

What's going on here?

By Alybb33 - 05/04/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I went through my boyfriend’s phone and saw texts between him and his female friend. I confronted him about it and smashed his phone to pieces. He seems genuinely more upset that he can’t talk to her anymore rather than me being mad at him or his expensive smartphone being broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 1 303

High school drama

By Anonymous - 01/10/2021 20:00

Today, I went to the mall with friends. I'd ditched other friends in order to go out with these friends. At the table next to me was an ex, and on the top floor were the other friends I'd ditched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 1 731

Fried

By Anonymous - 28/12/2024 22:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I decided to bleach my hair but then my mom got mad and put my hair in a bun after helping bleach it. Mind you, it is currently blonde orange and black and I don't think it worked, and my hair is fried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 430

Always ready

By Anonymous - 13/04/2025 12:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I'm working remotely. Every morning at 8:30, all staff announces, "Morning, I'm online" in a chat app. I woke up two minutes before work began and accidentally typed, "Morning, I'm awake." The app showed two other staff members (including the boss) typing their messages then suddenly they stopped. They'd seen my message. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 352

Banished

By Anonymous - 25/11/2023 20:00

Today, I was on an early flight home after a night of drinking. I was sat in my seat when I started feeling sweaty and nauseous. I grabbed the puke bag and started gagging, then puking, and a really loud fart came out. Everyone heard it. The attendant switched me seat to sit alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 841

Third wheel

By sammy - 11/01/2026 20:00

Today, and since 2026 started, my two friends began liking each other and I'm very happy for them. The problem? They get so close (literally and figuratively) that they do things that make me feel left out (both subjectively and objectively). Everyone says it's normal, but when I was in love I never did that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 282

Teamwork

By Cheifs - 23/06/2025 22:00 - Australia - Darwin

Today, I joined a Zoom meeting and spent 10 minutes talking about my car issues to a group of strangers who were definitely not my usual team. I then realized I was in a webinar for bird enthusiasts who were too polite to interrupt me talking about transmissions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 447

The blame game

By Anonymous - 19/02/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I got bad food poisoning. Again. The first time I thought it was the stomach bug that’s going around, so once I felt better, I proceeded to eat leftover food that actually got me sick the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 696

Sacked

By Anonymous - 22/03/2024 22:00 - United States - Decatur

Today, my younger sister saw one of my friends "sack tap" me, and randomly did it to me herself as I walked past her. She doesn't get why it's "funny" when my friend does it but not as funny when she does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 546

Walked into her trap

By yikes - 18/03/2023 10:00

Today, I learned the VERY hard way that if you’re gonna go onto your neighbor’s property, yell at them for parking on your side of the street, and threaten to call the city on them, then you should probably make sure she doesn’t have pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 1 771

Prepare for trouble

By Anonymous - 27/11/2025 03:00

Today, I was walking in the street, and ahead of me was a girl with a flowing dress. It was windy and the dress lifted up, showing for a split second Pokemon underwear. Before I could stop myself, I said: "Pikachu, I see you." She turned around and slapped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 672

Martial artist

By Weakling - 02/02/2025 03:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, we did board breaking at a karate demonstration. I was nervous about failing in front of everyone, but I kept my cool. Good news, I broke the board. Bad news, I started crying like a baby because it hurt my hand. I'm 26. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 377

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The Top

Today, a co-worker passed me a note with information about one of our cute, new co-workers I was interested in. Her report? Simple: "Lesbian. Try again. They're EVERYWHERE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 175

You deserved it 3 686

Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard. When I asked him why he said, "Our cat was named Spicy and I can't stand to look at them." Our recently deceased cat's name was Dicey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 719

You deserved it 3 351

Today, I was at work when someone came in asking me to brush their pet Shih Tzu. After an hour of vigorously grooming through the multiple knots, I called the owner to collect their dog. When she got here she said, "Oh, did I say brush? I meant shave." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 302

You deserved it 2 981

Today, at a rehearsal, a friend poked me: "My mother is in the orchestra, guess who she is!" I jokingly answer: "Erm…The fat singer?". It was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 207

You deserved it 27 318

Today, I went to the beach with friends. While splashing around in the ocean and waving to my friends who were sitting on the sand, I got caught in a strong current and had to be rescued by a lifeguard. They gave me a wristband that said, "Needs Adult Supervision". FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 332

Today, my dad gave a speech at my wedding. It started with, “Forty years ago, there was a tree…” and continued in the same vein about his work as a biologist. I might have been mentioned in passing. My new wife was not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 86