Painting

Alexa, play "Paintwork" by The Fall

By Nicky - 11/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, we had painters in the house. My 4 year-old grandson kept telling me, "Grandpa ate the painter's sandwich." While the painters were running an errand, my husband ate their sandwich, then left to go to work. I was left to explain/apologize to the painters that my husband ate their PB&J. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 108

Dali, eat your heart out

By anonymous - 19/11/2023 15:00 - United States - Rochester

Today, it's been over a week since I started painting a mural on my bedroom wall. Turns out, I'm not as artistic as I thought, because my attempt at a serene landscape now looks more like a psychedelic nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215

You deserved it 434

Steady on

By Anonymous - 20/10/2023 07:00 - Canada

Today, I found out the hard way that you shouldn't try to open a can of paint with a screwdriver. The lid flew off, and my kitchen floor now looks like an abstract art painting, which I could probably call, "Various blue splodges on wood canvas." FML

I agree, your life sucks 187

You deserved it 575

All shook up

By Anonymous - 23/04/2023 22:30 - Australia - Adelaide CBD

Today, in an effort to save some money, I attempted to paint my own house. Instead, I fell off the ladder and broke my dominant arm. Now I can’t work, brush my teeth, or even wipe my ass. My house is half-painted with stuff everywhere and I have 6 weeks to recover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 265

Technique

By onlyintx - 19/07/2021 11:01

Today, after 3 days of vigorously scrubbing primer on the walls with a painting roller, I finally realized that simply re-wetting the roller after each stroke is the correct and easier way. Dang, can I be slow to catch on sometimes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 993

Taint

By PaintedBum - 11/03/2019 18:00

Today, I was painting the bathroom door post. A drop of paint fell on the toilet roll. Guess how I found out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 023

You deserved it 401

By anonymous - 03/07/2011 04:47 - Canada

Today, it took me 5 hours to paint my deck, only to have it ruined by the neighbor's cat running all over the undry paint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 783

You deserved it 3 438

Remodeling

By Spelit - 13/08/2010 19:45 - United States

Today, I finished painting my living room. I had to leave the house in a rush. When I got home, I found smears of paint all around and the carpet crusted with paint that had dried. My cat had rubbed up against the walls and tracked it around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 013

You deserved it 13 617

Dry

By moresexperience - 11/09/2009 12:26 - United States

Today, I had dinner with my girlfriend of five months along with my mom and dad. It all was going fine until my mom asked aloud, "Everything going smooth for you in the bedroom?" to which my girlfriend replied, "No." I'd actually been painting the master bedroom at my parent's house for some extra cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 465

You deserved it 4 304

Keywords

Awkward Love Break-ups Proposal Thief Engagement ring Embarrassing Farts Work AITA Animals Cats Weird Am I overreacting? Friends Miscellaneous Social Media Facebook Accident Ironic Technology Clumsy Medication Parents Kids Relatable Neighbours Singing Health Dentist

The Top

USA, USA, USA; well, almost. Today we're not welcoming a French artist, not even an American artist, but an artist from... oh, you'll see! Are you in a hurry or something? Why can't we just sit down, have a nice cup of tea and talk about the future? ...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 3

Today, while trying to spice up our marriage, we decided to get a hotel room and roleplay as strangers who meet in a bar and have a one night stand. By the time I got there, he was engrossed in the football and on the beer. He didn't notice me arrive and when he did, he was too drunk to get the roleplay right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 505

You deserved it 295

The Top

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 324

You deserved it 14 191

Today, even though I’m very careful, my modeling agency said that I’d put on weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 276

You deserved it 54

Today, I went to the salon to get some acrylics done. They increased the prices recently and it was more expensive than expected. I didn’t have enough money in my account to cover the service, so I planned on running out when I had the chance. I ended up running out only to faceplant in the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59

You deserved it 1 471

Today, I was throwing a surprise birthday party for my friend. As we all hid in the dark waiting for him to arrive, I unexpectedly sneezed so loudly that I scared everyone, and they jumped out before he had even finished unlocking the front door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 131

Today, my son paid the price for emulating his idols, aka the sub-human scum on Jersey Shore. He called me from jail and actually had the balls to try to guilt me into bailing him out, after he'd been arrested for punching his girlfriend at a liquor store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 577

You deserved it 4 703

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me, "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 766

You deserved it 62 867