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OP here. This happened a few years ago. She's like 28 and has loose wires in her brain. I ended up quitting that job. Not because of her. I haven't seen her since.

By Anonymous - 08/10/2009 16:32 - United States

Today, at work, my husband came in and brought me flowers and a card for our anniversary. I opened the card to find a condom. I ran over and closed the door and we immediately got at it in the middle of my office. Halfway through, I realized I have been laying on the intercom button. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 248

You deserved it 37 177

By Daivv - 28/01/2010 15:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that shouting 'arsehole' at a speeding car is not a good idea. Two chavs MIGHT just turn around, drive onto the pavement and push you into a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 247

You deserved it 29 407

Die-hard supporter

By Seule - 29/06/2016 04:07 - Switzerland - Pully

Today, on a movie date with my boyfriend, it took me a while to understand why he was leaning on his elbow during the entire thing. He had an earpiece cupped in his hand and was listening to a soccer match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 246

You deserved it 1 711

Yummy

By munckncruncj15 - 22/10/2009 04:19 - United States

Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 246

You deserved it 36 965

Funny haha

By Anonymous - 11/07/2016 21:02 - United States - Pasadena

Today, my mom called me for dinner by saying, "We're going to eat Steph! I mean we're going to eat COMMA Steph! We're not going to eat you! Ha ha!" She thinks this joke is hilarious and has been doing it to both my dad and me every night since early June. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 246

You deserved it 1 015

Freakout

By itssdianaa - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was home alone, and I thought I heard someone breaking in through the side gate at my house. I was terrified, so I called the police. It turned out it was the gas company checking the meter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 242

You deserved it 28 319

By Speechless - 17/06/2016 08:12

Today, it's been a few days since I saw an ad advertising my job after being told about it by a telemarketer. When I asked my boss about it, she claimed things were fine, it was an old ad, not to worry. Now, I was actually fired for no valid reason. A telemarketer gave me more warning than they did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 241

You deserved it 885

By Anonymous - 25/10/2016 11:35

Today, I explained to my boss what clickbait is and why it's bad practice to use it when writing online. After my explanation, she ordered me to go ahead with it, saying it's "exactly what we need". This person is the marketing communications director for a major multinational company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 241

You deserved it 1 209

Just in case

By DesperateMother - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - France - Wasselonne

Today, my 16-year-old daughter handed me the picture she wants TV reports to use if ever she happens to get kidnapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 239

You deserved it 1 171

By ashleighsheba - 27/09/2016 16:43 - United States - La Vergne

Today, I got pulled over, not because I was speeding but because apparently, I looked like a kid driving. The officer said I was too short to drive and needed a booster seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 235

You deserved it 1 164

By anonymous - 24/05/2016 03:41 - United States - Manchester

Today, I got put in a speech impediment class because apparently I have a lisp. No, my tongue is just swollen, and I can't talk very well because of it. I've talked normally for the past 17 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 235

You deserved it 765

By RIP job - 28/09/2016 04:26 - Australia

Today, I had a job interview for an amazing opportunity. Too bad my nerves made me forget what the role was and where it was, mid-interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 234

You deserved it 1 557

Duped

By rippedoff - 04/03/2010 14:09 - Australia

Today, I found out that the man who sold me my car 6 months ago lied about it being "recently serviced" and "in excellent condition". It actually hasn't been serviced in years, and fixing all its problems is going to cost me $900 more than what I paid for the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 233

You deserved it 29 894

Fuzzy memory

By Kreen - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff

Today, I realized that mixing alcohol with my medication causes me to lose my memory. I went to see my favorite band in concert last night and I can't remember a single song they played. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 232

You deserved it 45 005

By hatemylifelol - 08/01/2016 20:33 - United States - Roseville

Today, I noticed I parked behind a boy I like. Trying to impress him with my driving skills, I ended up forgetting to put the car in reverse and rear-ended him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 231

You deserved it 20 906

By your mother - 13/10/2010 09:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I went out for ice cream. We somehow started talking about which of our relatives had died. Right when she was talking about how her grandfather had died, I started laughing. She had gotten ice cream all over her face. She broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 228

You deserved it 40 503

By HauntedTwilight - 12/08/2016 02:55 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my bitchy manager got back from vacation. To be nice, I asked her how it was. She said "not long enough". I mumbled "I agree". She definitely heard. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 12 228

You deserved it 5 327

HauntedTwilight tells us more.

HauntedTwilight 20

Monday 5 September 2016 1:12

Haha op here! This was a few months ago. Said manager WAS walking away - but you can only but so much into one fml story. All she said was "I agree on that!" So I'm assuming she took it as me literally saying she didn't get a long enough vacation (thinks she sits on a throne). She knows she's a bitch. 4 people quit the past two weeks because of her. (Numerous employees did the whole hr thing / labour board - didn't work) She's very vindictive over small things, calls people out in front of other employees and customers, gossips about all the employees, tries to pin her mistakes on you and worst blackmails and manipulates peolple, etc. The list goes on. She's a monster. THANKFULLY she's due for another vacation soon. If there wasn't so lack of jobs where I live, I'd be walking out of there with the other 4.