Work: Today, while working at a restaurant, I told an old couple that...

By Anonymous - 24/04/2018 03:44

Today, while working at a restaurant, I told an old couple that their “vibrator will go off when a table is available.” I meant to say pager. They walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 909

You deserved it 997

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/03/2019 12:00 - United States - Salem

Today, I asked a table at a restaurant if there's anything I could get out of their way and they replied, "Yeah, you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 240

You deserved it 241

By oops - 18/05/2009 04:17 - United States

Today, while I was waitressing, I bent down to pick up a menu and accidentally farted, really loud, at my table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 501

You deserved it 10 829

Near the knuckle

By Anonymous - 20/10/2020 05:01

Today, as a waitress I served someone who was hoping their food would come back faster than expected. I replied, “Fingers crossed!” just for the person to show me they had no hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 127

By WaitedOut - 03/10/2012 08:07 - United States - Saukville

Today, at work, I got to wait on one of those tables where everyone had very complex orders, and some of them sent their food back. When the time finally came for me to bring them their check and receive my well-earned tip, I returned only to discover that they'd dined and dashed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 362

You deserved it 2 138

Mortified

By Anonymous - 19/05/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, at work, my vibrator rolled out of my bag so far down the table that I couldn’t catch it, and had to run round the table to grab it by leaning between two of my male coworkers. That vibrator lives under my bed, so the only way it could've got in my work bag would be my boyfriend pranking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 181

By Ashton Sprunger - 30/12/2011 05:38 - United States

Today, I was taking people's orders at the drive-thru. I was confused as to why people were screaming their orders at me, until one of my managers handed me a paper that he'd found taped to the menu, saying "speak loudly speaker isn't working properly." Punkd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 740

You deserved it 3 311

Tipped off

By Anonymous - 30/09/2014 23:42 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was taking a table's order. After I finished, the guy told me, "Just FYI, I'm not a tipper." Trying to lighten up the situation, I replied, "It's amazing how many people forget I handle their food." He complained to the manager that I'd threatened him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 753

You deserved it 10 173

I just work here

By stupidapperently - 01/02/2013 04:06 - United States

Today, while checking out a couple at work, I handed them their receipt and wished them a good day. The woman promptly pulled her husband to the side, and whispered to him about how much of a "fucking idiot" I was for making the prices so high. I work at McDonald's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 726

You deserved it 2 411

Karen strikes again

By Anonymous - 17/02/2021 08:01

Today, at work as a manager at pizza place, I got yelled by a customer because they got one fewer paper plates than they asked for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 767

You deserved it 116

By Bob - 14/04/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, I was working at a local restaurant when another server's table called me over to ask if I've "ever killed anybody". They informed me I looked like a serial killer. I informed them, of course, that I have never killed anybody. Another customer claimed I scared her child. I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 013

You deserved it 4 678

interesting33 36

Sunday 8 April 2018 3:29

I feel like their reaction was quite an overreaction... it is very natural to say vibrator for that.

Donut_Wizard 23

Tuesday 24 April 2018 1:44

When they walked out, did they take the pager with them?

Comments

interesting33 36

Sunday 8 April 2018 3:29

I feel like their reaction was quite an overreaction... it is very natural to say vibrator for that.

Donut_Wizard 23

Tuesday 24 April 2018 1:44

When they walked out, did they take the pager with them?

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 24 April 2018 17:51

They did, but nobody wanted to retrieve it...if you know what I mean.

Zekfen 17

Tuesday 24 April 2018 1:45

“I’m not ready to be seated, can you make it go off again?”

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 24 April 2018 2:36

Of course, she wanted the vibrator to go off NOW!

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 24 April 2018 4:08

I’d say your career in food service is on... wait on it... shaky ground.

tonyfan00 38

Tuesday 24 April 2018 4:59

Did they walk out with the pager? Because if so, it might be used in substitute of a vibrator...

dexter420 21

Tuesday 24 April 2018 5:44

Prudes!

bigdaddyeric 35

Tuesday 24 April 2018 6:06

What a couple of prudes, good riddance to them!

Alastair Chin 3

Tuesday 24 April 2018 9:03

Iolz

Davros 12

Tuesday 24 April 2018 10:02

I bet the wife was hesitant to leave.

Keywords

Friends Love Awkward Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Parenting Kids Family Cats DIY Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management Poopoo peepee Coworkers Frustration Capitalism ADHD Dogs Animals Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 004

You deserved it 42 709

Today, it's day one of my suspension and probably being fired from my job. Why? I accidentally took a beer out my bag instead of a soda, then got distracted working to make sure everything got done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 522

The Top

shit shit shit shit shit

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 84

Today, I once again had to clean up a shower and bathroom covered in feces, because of client with incontinence. It smelt so bad that I couldn’t hide my reaction; the client saw my face and I could see the embarrassment on theirs. I spent the rest of the day feeling like an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 560

You deserved it 241

Today, I got a 25-cent raise at work. That would be wonderful, had they not cut 6 hours off my schedule as well. I'm now making $200 less a month than I was pre-raise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 905

You deserved it 104

Nice going, buddy.

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 136

Today, my boyfriend came in to kiss me. Being sweaty and nasty, I said "Not now, I'm hot and sweaty." He looked at me blankly and said "So am I, just smell my ball sweat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 212

You deserved it 7 501

Today, I found out that my girlfriend’s friends secretly make fun of me. They call me “grandpa” and a “massive creep.” They’re in their 20s. My girlfriend is 22 and I’m 48. Apparently, dating a consenting legal adult is considered “creepy.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 185

You deserved it 1 904

Same thing different taste

Near the knuckle

Mortified

Tipped off

I just work here

Karen strikes again

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