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jfyi, $17 of it went into my tank. i know it was stupid to leave it unattended, i made the post so other morons, like myself, could maybe not do something so stupid. I am fully aware you are not supposed to leave a pump unattended, something i have known for the past 10 years, regardless of the fact that the gas station i was at did not have a single sign stating the obvious(i went back and checked) i was in the gas station maybe 3 minutes at most and i was prepared and willing to pay any clean up fees needed, however the 'specialized' materials this particular attendant used was kitty litter, which she took off of the shelf and opened before going outside. the only reason i feel this would remotely qualify as a FML vs YDI is that i was stupid enough to think a drink was worth leaving my car alone at the time, so really more of a FML for being an idiot type of thing.

By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 10:19 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my girlfriends house. After having sex, we went downstairs to where the rest of the family was. At this point I did not realise that I had a used condom stuck to my foot. The family did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 902

You deserved it 40 517

By Roostermann25 - 31/05/2016 01:34 - United States - Lebanon

Today, while meeting some of the big boss guys at my new job, one of the men sneezed on his hand and then grabbed mine for a handshake. I felt every gooey bit of his snot between our hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 901

You deserved it 989

By synyster505 - 19/12/2010 05:41 - United States

Today, I put my old kitchen table at the end of my driveway with a free sign on it. Later, I saw my neighbor drag it to his yard with a $50 for sale sign on it. It's now gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 900

You deserved it 36 620

By Anonymous - 16/08/2016 08:26 - United States - Wasilla

Today, I was woken up by my dad screaming that the ship was sinking. I started freaking out before I realized that I was sleeping on my couch at home and was not in fact on a ship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 899

You deserved it 1 816

By pissedoff - 28/06/2016 11:53 - United States - Benton

Today, my morning started off by stepping in my dog's piss by the door. Then, stepping in my husband's piss by the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 894

You deserved it 1 353

By Anonymous - 04/03/2011 00:45 - United States

Today, I learned that if I don't clean out the litter box everyday, my cat will resort to shitting in the laundry basket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 893

You deserved it 34 999

By Anonymous - 09/07/2016 04:09

Today, I walked in on my son flopping around on the floor with a blanket wrapped around his legs. Apparently at age 22, he'd rather pretend to be a mermaid than go out and get a damn job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 888

You deserved it 2 470

By codyolimason - 08/06/2016 20:36 - United States - Macedon

Today, I went to pick my dog up from my old house where my ex-boyfriend still lives. I rang the doorbell and saw him look out of the side window holding the dog. When I told him I was there for my dog, he claimed that the dog was his now. He broke up with me because he hates dogs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 887

You deserved it 935

codyolimason tells us more.

codyolimason 12

Thursday 9 June 2016 23:35

Hey guys it's OP I'm honestly surprised this was published considering its my first FML, but that's besides the point and for those of you if you're curious my dog is a King Charles Cavalier Spaniel named Bella. I was with the guy for about a year and 8 months and he had always been the sweetest. To all the people who are saying he broke up with me because of other reasons, he broke up with me about a week after he asked me to move into his apartment and he realized I had a dog(even though he has met her on multiple occasions) I guess I should mention I had just arrived with a moving truck to move my stuff in. So I don't know what other reason it could have been. So I should clarify that it was technically my new place. I left the dog at the apartment while I went back to my previous apartment to see if it was possible to get it back, and I had no where else to put her because all of my family lives about 800 miles away and this happened when most people were at work so I couldn't ask my friends. I also wasn't going to leave my dog in the car with all this heat. I asked my ex if she could stay while I went back to my previous apartment and he said it was okay as long as I got her before he had to leave for work(which is understandable). And to those who offered comments about how I could get her back, THANK YOU for the input. I did rescue her and have had her about 2 years, so I do have documents from the vet, stating she is mine. She is also a registered therapy dog so I have all the registration paperwork for that.