By babyblues - 20/11/2012 19:45 - United States - Woodhaven
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Unless OP and her bf are Christian.... As they consider condom are not natural so its against God's will.
I really don't see any reason 85 is getting thumbed down. I ALWAYS stack birth control methods as I do not want to make a baby and I definitely don't wan to kill one. I am too young to have kids (21), so I always wear a condom and pull out. Even if she claims to be on the pill.
28 and 39: Catholics ARE Christian. While the original and growing Church has come to have slight distinctions, any Christian is in the Christian Church. Anyway, yes, specifically the Catholic position is against contraceptives, but Christianity's doctrine in general doesn't support fornicating.
Don't marry someone you haven't had sex with, physical intimacy is a huuuge part of a relationship, not something you wanna gamble with. Telling you to wait until marraige is the church's way of controlling you by making you feel guilty about your natural urges :) To the OP- sorry he was so immature about the situation. The weight of a pregnancy scare should be shared by both partners, regardless whether you've taken a test or not. If you ARE pregnant, it doesn't sound like this guy is ready to stick with you through thick and thin, so best of luck...
165 churches, at least mine, say no to premarital sex because sex is not just a physical thing, it involves a lot more than just flesh. When you give it away and the relationship fails, it damages you. But your opinion is your opinion I just wanted to say not all Christians wana "control you" and "make you feel guilty"
Condoms are 98% effective in preventing pregnancy if used correctly, so yes, the beauty of condoms. (Not to say that 84, or anyone in her situation, did't know how to use one, I know accidents happen.) |: And for all of the religious rambling: "However, in late 2010 the Pope appeared to modify the Catholic Church's view on condom use. In an interview published in a new book, he seems to have said that it might be permissible to use a condom in order to prevent the transmission of infection. Various translations of this interview have appeared. The Vatican has recently tried to clarify Benedict XVI's comments, saying he meant that the use of a condom by a man or a woman to prevent HIV transfer 'could be an act of responsibility', if intended to protect life."
Ok, I have to say I'm a big believer in the 'try before you buy' scheme. So to all the people calling OP a sinner? Get off you're high horse and find yourselves a partner (not a priest). The church is always changing its position on certain things, taking on new meanings to scripture etc. that's why it's so popular and successful. I guarantee before we die, our generation will see the pope handing out free condoms.
My mom used a condom, and then I was born. I don't think they work 99% of the time. I think there's a 50% chance, due to the fact that you don't always see those small holes and it only takes one sperm cell to make a baby. Either don't have sex until you can financially care for a baby, or if you trust your boyfriend, use the pullout method. I've spoken to many girls who have gotten pregnant from using condoms and birth control. I've been using the pullout method for over 3 years (since I started having sex), and still no baby. Never talked to a girl who has gotten pregnant by using that method but I'm not saying it hasn't happened either.
205, you do realize that the "pull out method" is also called "pull and pray" because when ever the penis is stroked it releases pre cum. That's more sperm cells per every time it's stroke than what gets through a tiny hole in the condom. And if you are not using spermicide with this supposed fool proof method, he might as well be doing his business in you.
205- Your bio says you're 17, which would mean you've been having sex since you were 14? In your words "don't have sex until you can financially take care of a baby"... Why in the world were you having sex so young? I work with so many pregnant teenagers (I work for an online high school) that I honestly just get sad when I hear about people that age having sex. You are lucky to not be pregnant yet, considering you only use he "pull out method".
250- oh they do. Just most don't listen. You can easily get condoms and birth control from the health department or go to your mother and tell her that your period is heavy and painful and you need to try something like birth control to lessen it. That's how I got mine. But I actually needed it for that. The added protection will be nice when I decide to start having sex with my long term boyfriend.
Why would being a parent suck?? I am a mother of 3 and it's the best job in the world! People need to learn to not talk about what they don't know. And if OP's bf is freaking cause she MIGHT be pregnant chances are if she really is he won't be man enough to stick around.
I understand whole heartedly why a guy would be completely freaked out. But, why do you assume that a woman wouldn't be? Two people were placed within this situation and perhaps the girl was scared and wanted a little support since he played a part in it as well. There are obviously wrongs and rights here, but I really don't think every woman should stress in silence about the situation if she really can't cope with it.
105 -- I can relate. Sadly, I'm speaking from experience. The freakout-age is something that happens on both sides, and it seems that the woman is actually impacted more, because there could be something going on in her body that makes her think she's pregnant, thus causing the stress. Coincidentally, if while on her period, the woman is extremely stressed, it can cause prolonged period symptoms (except without the bleeding). Though I can understand that side of it, I completely disagree with her telling the dude that she's pregnant without some sort of confirmation. (FYI, I have no children.)
87- I am sure you were ready, both financially and emotionally, to start a family. In this situation, neither OP nor her boyfriend would have been prepared for the task of being parents, which everyone agrees is both time consuming and financially draining. Therefore, being a parent at that time would have sucked.
Because some girls freak out especially when they are too soon to test. I think they're just looking for support and comfort. I mean it takes two to tango. There's no reason ONLY the woman should go through the stress of worrying and waiting to find out.. The guy had just as much to (possibly) making the baby as she did.
It shouldn't be scary. When you become sexually active it is YOUR responsibility to know and accept that at any time you could impregnate someone. No birth control is a 100% effective accept a vasectomy or tubes tied. That's a part of having sex. If you're to irresponsible or childish to e prepared for that you shouldn't be having sex or should have a vasectomy/tubes tied.
Let's see... something completely unexpected happens, presumably despite measures being taken to prevent it, that will utterly and irreversibly change your life forever. You have less than a year to prepare for this one thing that will continue affecting you until you die. You know what? You're right, 247! Finding that scary is completely irrational. I'm glad we have you here to make us see sense.
110 - In 106's defence the dual meaning of 'ejaculation' that you were attempting to use would make a lot more sense when spoken. You kind of lose the context when written, particularly when viewed as a stand alone comment. Plus, OP's boyfriend didn't so much ejaculate as fizzle.
My mom gives the best advice (both my parents do) and helps keep me levelheaded. Why not go to someone who you would consider older and wiser? Especially if you have a great relationship with them. However, the boyfriend might have jumped the gun a little too soon. Some information should remain private between you two until you get all the facts straight.
His age shouldn't matter, an unexpected pregnancy can be scary no matter how old you are.
I understand stressing and hoping she isn't but crying and calling his mother is ridiculous. When you become sexually active it is YOUR responsibility to know that anything can happen. No type of birth control is %100 accurate except tubes tied or a vasectomy. It is your responsibility once you are having sex that there is always a possibility of a pregnancy and to know how to handle it and be prepared. If he is that freaked out about having a baby he should have a vasectomy or not have sex.
I was told I couldn't get pregnant, and was taking birth control for a medical condition. I now have a 2 year old. And when I found out, I freaked. When you expect that it can't happen, and it does, it's terrifying. You don't know if or what they were using for protection, so shut up.
YDI! Why would you tell someone that before taking a pregnancy test or seeing a doctor?! Babies aren't a joke!
I can sort of see why OP would do that. Sometimes you might think you're pregnant but not be sure because it's too early for a pregnancy test. No sense in her being the only one freaking out since he's just as responsible. Unless she's one of those people who thinks she's pregnant every month...
You totally deserved it. "I MIGHT be pregnant.." Who the fuck does that?
"Hey babe.. I know you are busy but i just thought i should tell you that my period is a day late and i might be pregnant but don't overreact. I haven't even taken a pregnancy test yet. I mean we all knew this would happen eventually. We have been dating a whole 2 months now..."