By Now What - 08/09/2016 17:04 - United States - South Otselic

Today, my boyfriend told me he only loves me sometimes. He explained what days he chooses to love me and what days he doesn't want to. I told him that's not how it works. He disagreed. He's 27. He still doesn't understand why this is a problem. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 775
You deserved it 1 294

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This reminds me of that YouTube kid who says he only likes his mommy when she gives him cookies. I think your boyfriend may actually be a two-year-old.

He sounds like an excessively spoilt child. I doubt whether talking will help much, he seems to be stubborn too. If he wants to act like a child treat him like one. I don't mean for you to physically discipline him, but you need to show him that he can't always get what he wants.

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This reminds me of that YouTube kid who says he only likes his mommy when she gives him cookies. I think your boyfriend may actually be a two-year-old.

Exactly what I first thought of lol!

If he's serious it may be time to have a serious chat about where your relationship is going (or not). If he's just being a dick just put laxatives in his drink or something to get him back.

Because putting laxatives in someone's drink for being an immature jerk totally makes you look so much better by comparison.

Plus you know, illegal.

Woah, that's illegal? 0.o

You're drugging someone without their consent. Why wouldn't that be illegal?

pretty shitty attitude if you ask me.

You did read the FML about the terrifying girl who drugged her parent with sleeping pills right? Drugging someone, no matter how innocuous the pills seem to be is NEVER a good idea! The outcome is too unpredictable. E.g. if they are taking incompatible medicines, allergies. ..

Wtf ? OP please don't stay with someone who will treat you like that .. It's childish and ridiculous, not to mention super creepy. Who know what other kinds of pathological disorders he may have ? I think everyone here will advise you to get the f out while you still can

He sounds like an excessively spoilt child. I doubt whether talking will help much, he seems to be stubborn too. If he wants to act like a child treat him like one. I don't mean for you to physically discipline him, but you need to show him that he can't always get what he wants.

Where I'm from, we spell some of the transitive verbs with a 't' and not 'ed'. I've spelt it like that for years now.

You shouldn't have to parent your partner.

time for you to move on OP...

He may not have worded it very well, but I understand where he's coming from. in a relationship you are never in love with your partner 100% of the time. It takes dedication, to know that the moments when you don't feel incredibly in love with your patner are passing, and to hold on to the reasons why you really are with them. How they make you feel when things are at their best. Nobody is at their best all the time. Nobody is in love all the time. I think that's just natural.

You don't have to always agree with your partner, or like the way they're acting or the things they're saying, but you should always love them. Love is unconditional by nature and can't be switched on and off.

iamscott 16

I am so confused by your logic here... I have a dog, I love her all the time. I don't pick and choose when I do and don't love her. This is so strange. O.o

I think I understand what you mean #6, if you mean being crazy/infatuated about someone, vs sometimes just feeling kind of neutral about them. In that sense I agree with you that it's not always "moonshine and roses" in a relationship, and you can't expect to be "high" every day. But I also agree with the other replies to your comment, namely that love in itself is something deeper that cannot be turned on or off. It stays there in the background, even if you're livid with someone after having a fight. You still "love" them, even if you can't stand them in that moment/day. From the way OP wrote it I think her boyfriend must be an idiot, because even the infatuation/craziness about someone you can't turn on and off willingly, or schedule for Monday, Wednesday and the weekend while Tuesday, Thursday and Friday you decide not to love/like/be crazy about someone. It's not a choice that can be scheduled, it's the natural highs and lows of a relationship if anything. And it's definitely not love.

#8. loving a dog/pet isn't like loving another human.

What strange logic... even if I was really annoyed at something by boyfriend had done, that wouldn't mean I didn't love him in that moment. Love doesn't flick on and off depending on your mood. And #15, yes it is. Obviously you aren't IN love with your pet (I hope) but it can be similar to the way you love a human friend or sibling.

This comment thread makes me think of Pink's song "True Love." "You're an asshole, but I love you."

To #6, if you aren't in love with your partner 100% of the time, if you can pick and choose when to love someone...you aren't really in love. Getting pissed or being annoyed with them is different than not loving them at that moment... If you feel that way, you aren't all in for your partner and you shouldn't be leading them to believe you are.

Moonlight not moonshine.

what about a pet human?

#18 I meant in that the way you love a pet verses humans is different so you don't love them the same way. It's easier to love a pet. Dogs and cats aren't as complicated to deal with so it's easier and unlike human friends/family/lovers you don't have the fighting miscommunication causes.

Thanks #29, I was quickly translating from a similar saying we have in Afrikaans, which is "maanskyn en rose" and somehow jumped to moonshine instead of moonlight (which as you say is correct). But now I'm thinking, wouldn't being in love be more "moonshine and roses" due to the crazy drunkenness you go through? Haha, just rambling on here...

break up with him.....

#SpoilerAlert (kind of) OP's boyfriend might be the magician from The Prestige (awesome movie - go watch it)

I totally thought of that when I read this post!

I'm so glad I wasn't the only one who thought of this! Man, now I wanna watch the movie.

This reminds me of the film "The Prestige". Maybe the twin that replaces him some days is not in love but he is...

When you're in love he/she may do unspeakably horrible things that hurt you and despite being hurt, angry and upset you still love them with all your heart. OAP's boyfriend probably 'loves' her on days they have sex. I suggest, unless you've only recently met, dump him and find someone who will care more for you. If you don't you will never be truly loved.