Today, I went to Subway with my girlfriend. Just as the time came for her to pay, she went to the car to grab her purse. She didn't come back. I found a note on the windshield saying, "It's over." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Hello, goodbye
Today, my wife of three years asked me to meet her for lunch at Subway. When I arrived, she was standing in the parking lot. She handed me a footlong sub, said "I got you a turkey sandwich" and followed it up with "And I'm leaving you." FML
Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML
One last thing…
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She came over to see me one last time. We hugged for minutes and cried; it was a touching moment. Just after she left, I realized my wallet that I had on the table beside us was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
Today, I went for a drive to clear my head of relationship issues. That night, I got pulled over. Lost the car and my license. I texted my girlfriend, saying I was sorry; she left. Lost her too. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I loved her. She left and never came back. FML
Carrier pigeon
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a Post-it note on my locker that said, "Consider yourself dumped." FML
Eternity
Today, I took my girlfriend to eat out at a restaurant. We chatted for an hour, and it all seemed to be going well, until she told me that she wanted to break up. Waiting for the bill and driving her home was the most painful time of my life. FML
Top comments
DreaminOfMusic 0
dude it's subway just pay for it and get over it. $5 footlongs duh!
urdirtyolduncle 15
Maybe it was because you couldn't give her a footlong?
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Comments (402)
TheScriptKidd 0
noob
Olovio 5
boob
liquidfireKAN 0
maybe it's cause you tried to make her pay? idk
urdirtyolduncle 15
Maybe it was because you couldn't give her a footlong?
vistamar 3
win^^
mmmskittles 3
she asked for a cucumber and you gave her a soggy pickle
mandipandi30 0
35- u made my day:)
PurpleRae420 0
What a bitch): Just sayin!
Imabigbeast 5
footlongs must cost more than $5 at his subway
sterlingarcher 1
35 that is amazing...lol...
sheagstaz 0
maybe it has something to do with taking her out on a date to Subway
jinglez 4
ya he should have paid
kcluna 6
YDI for trying to make her pay for Subway!!!!!!
imacreeper 3
maybe because you couldn't make your floppy disk turn into a hard drive.
uncbballwins 0
Why go to Subway for a $5 footlong when you can have mine for free?
arianylas 3
I have a feeling this relationship was going bad before this. First off, you said time for HER to pay the bill, not WE, and secondly, you said she had to go to the car for her purse. This tells me she wasn't expecting to foot the bill, but you were fully expecting her to. I'm willing to bet you relied on her too much to pay for things and she got fed up. YDI
spencespencespen 0
She was mad. Someone else was making his sandwiches.
corbincorbin 0
or someone else was eating the sandwiches he makes oh hoh!
chimpsndip 0
1- Aw yeah. Disturbed t-shirt ftw
LunaNstars 0
who would have thought subway makes you lose both weight and relationships? what the heck is noob?
TookaWooka666 0
Guess he wasn't givin her a $5 foot schlong.
vrivas 1
ha
DreaminOfMusic 0
dude it's subway just pay for it and get over it. $5 footlongs duh!
iSitt 0
at least op got the subclub points
urdirtyolduncle 15
That's just what they say to lure you in like a foolish prey. After tax and adding the stuff that is absolutely necessary to make a samwich, it comes up to about $6.50!
SteelCladAngel 0
most of the subways where I am don't even do te subclub points anymore people who worked at subway were stealing rolls of the tickets and giving them to friends an family, and using the tickets themselves
SteelCladAngel 0
it could be closer to 5.40 with tax and all the veggies are free, so unless you get extra meat or cheese it's going to be under $5
yaer 4
hmmm interesting... So it wasn't 5$ but 5.40$...
iSitt 0
the subways here use creditcard like cards and I can track the points online
TylerX 0
haha you guys have to pay tax.
plataapusss 0
that's a little expensive if ya know what im shayen
KiddNYC1O 20
It was the meter cop that left that note. Your 25 cents are up.
fmlwmty 0
yeah that's what you get for making her pay the bill douche ... it's over so get over it
uncbballwins 0
138- your pic makes me lol every time I see it
vyben 3
nope, don't know what your saying!
countryboyj17 0
$5.41 in Texas, stupid $.0825 tax
ProhibitionRose 14
haha...stfu. you're like 17, living with mommy and daddy...you don't pay for shit. when your allowance runs out and you start providing for yourself 100% then you can lol
ilOlAtYourfMlnUk 0
with tax? didn't know food at tax...
uncbballwins 0
244- I'm 17, have a job, pay taxes, and buy my own shit. STFU bitch
cooldukenukem 2
anyone else wondering what kind of subway makes you pay after the meal? the way op worded it sounds like they ate and then she ditched
kellanlvr 1
245- fast food has tax because they make it for you..only food you get at grocery stores like vegetables and fruits aren't taxed
nomnomsarah 3
244- judging by your profiles, your only a year older than #2.
BWill9014 4
apparently Ohio has no food tax or something because every time a person buys a 5 dollar footlong at the subway I work at... it comes to 5 dollars even unless they get extras or eat in... I know for sure we have an eat in tax
ilOlAtYourfMlnUk 0
268- don't tell me how to live your life!!!! haha:D
SteffeRae 4
not true. some states, like Ohio, take out is not taxed. but in others, food not bought in a grocery store is taxed because it's considered a luxury item, you don't need it to live. :)
tayza249 20
wow, $5 footlongs :o the cheapest ones on the menu here are $7. The better subs are about $10. $5 will only get you a cheap six-inch..
usmc370 0
same here
j_cat187 19
LA county its 10% sales tax
bodmonontheblock 0
who makes a girl pay anyways?
NoOneLovesYou 13
Who makes a guy pay? I'm a chick, but even I am tired of girls screaming "EQUALITY" unless they benefit from it. It's not equal if you make him foot the bill. Chivalry is dead, after all, and even if it weren't you shouldn't have to be chivalrous so she can be a cheap bitch.
heyyyjune 11
Jesus Christ! In Australia a six inch is 5.95 and a footling is 9.95.... Is there still a need to complain?
herrobear 0
That does suck, but why weren't you going to pay?
volley4eva1698 0
yeah, the man should always pay:) haha jk but if you're taking her to subway for a date, at least have the decency to pay for a sub..it's like 5 bucks
SteelCladAngel 0
maybe he paid for a movie and she paid for dinner? maybe they take turns paying for their dates
hypnotiq_trini 0
I understand taking turns with bills or going half in but if you're always making her pay I can understand why she would break up with you. Something as simple as that can turn ANYBODY off.
swimchica22 0
exactly
landonlasater 3
yet it's completely okay to let the man pay all the time?
zbean 0
maybe she was treating him to subway??
hypnotiq_trini 0
103 didn't you read my comment?
corbincorbin 0
I really don't think he did
rldostie 19
Why should he have to? Perhaps he paid for the last diner? Or he paid for the movie? Why is it assumed a man should always pay by virtue of owning a penis? Last I checked women had careers too, and make enough money to contribute to dates. If we can get over the fact that not all women want to be house wives, we must also accept the fact that not all men want to be walking ATMs.
KJLD5 0
180, what makes you think he was replying to you?
dashe95 3
238 you have earned like 1000 cool points from all the dudes in the world.
sxcsatan999 2
well said... women are all for equal rights but still believe the man takes care of everything... if u want the change be willing to change...
osellr 0
Chivalry is dead and women like you killed it.
herrobear 0
I don't mind paying for my girlfriend on a date at all. I can't think of a better reason to spend my money than a fun night with the person I love.
bunny25 0
Whenever I am out on a date, I usually try & pay my fair share instead of the guy paying for everything. It's just not something I'm used to anyway. Since I've had a job I've payed for my own stuff.
hypnotiq_trini 0
243, I was just stating that him saying that after what I responded was pointless. He's entitled to his opinion but clearly not all women feel that way (such as myself) my boyfriend and I split things fairly because I don't want him to feel used in any way.
gallaeo 21
I like the way you think #238. I have a very old fashioned way of looking at some things & often enjoy paying for dinners etc, but it is nice to be treated to dinner by my woman sometimes too.
cacheson 41
269- chivalry isn't dead it's just spread around more now! I'm a woman and I hold the door for people and pay for dinner and give my coat if someone is cold (etc, etc) frequently!
The_Cardinal 0
Maybe you should have offered to pay, cheapskate.
RaineLee 5
My thought exactly.
EatnBeef 7
she is one of those things we call a grade A bitch.
Leftieswillrule 3
maybe he paid all the other times and she was paying just once and she decided to break it off. never assume that the person who isn't paying is a cheapskate, especially when if this was a girl whose boyfriend broke up with her this way, your comment would be flamed to ashes
sheagstaz 0
^ thank you for stating the obvious
carbonbasedcynic 17
it obviously wasn't obvious since he had to explain it
Nandito2 0
Wow. and since web do u pay the check AFTER at subway?
BoCo_fml 9
Maybe she wasn't happy because he only has a 2 dollar 4 inch!
torio123 27
but no one said they had already finished the sub
Nandito2 0
But at subway u pay for the sub Wen u get the sub. U don't sit at a table get a menu eat then get a bill
iAmScrubs 19
28- That joke was so bad that I actually laughed at it.
painlessmind 11
lmfao
Nandito2 0
Dude don't be a hater, oh I made a mistake FML -_- it's 1 frigid letter!!!!
lucas755 1
"one frigid letter"? I think we're looking at more than a one-time mistake.
tr0llz0r 0
Damn, that's just cold.
Nandito2 0
^^^^^LOLOLOL u Win!!! and sorry, friggin gets auto-incorrected into frigid
painlessmind 11
26 people with $2 four inch subs
CSRozell 4
it said when it came time to pay now after we ate
mclovin1988 2
Always? Maybe it's just the city I live in, but I've never even heard of a Subway where you pay first...
BluPenguin 3
She didn't like your 5 dollar foot long.
chino627 0
probably a six inch sub that's why she left
Nandito2 0
when*
Lennsik 4
Hey, Chino, not to be a buzz kill. But the average penis length is 6 inches. >.>
griffindragon97 3
that's true
Kolden 11
win
scottishandrew1 0
you order, then pay every time at subway.
instnt1nfction 17
a fiddadly doo could be 6 inches, but it could be wierdly misshapen
j_cat187 19
#65 yea but mine is relley 3 feet. i beat off women with it
mclovin1988 2
Always? Maybe it's just the city I live in, but I've never even heard of a Subway where you pay first...
YacL 15
Wow, uh, that was pretty indecent of her. But I must admit, pretty clever. She got a free sub. But, still, it wasn't right of her. I'm sorry, OP. FYL.
Ratdaddy94 0
Anybody else notice that the man(OP) was expecting the women to pay for the food? That is not right in my mind, thus, YDI.
TheIrishJaneDoe 8
So, you just... don't read any other comments before posting your own, do you?
XxAndyasphixiate 1
Are you talking to me
sheagstaz 0
185 you sound like you get annoying really quick
sheagstaz 0
haters
brknankls 5
lmao
Scalabrine44 0
AWESOME GIRLFRIEND!!
TabzTheLoserKidd 4
EX girlfriend
sparkieforever 0
that sucks, but you should have been a gentleman and payed for hers anyways
rattusrattus 18
Why? I mean, they could have agreed to pay their own way beforehand. Or they could have an arrangement where they take it in turns to pay. Or she asked to pay for her own (unlikely as she pulled that little stunt). The only reason men were expected to pay for women was because women were considered property in the past and property can't own other property, obviously. However, I wouldn't take a date to Subway. The staff are really creepy if they speak English [or other main language]. I've been hit on and I've had one guy inform me about his plan to take over the world by becoming Pope. He was a Dan Brown fan.
sheethapins 13
Well you also gotta think, if they had discussed it prior why did she bail? Maybe op always made her foot the bill and she had enough. Note that her purse was in the car, it may have been a test to see if he'd actually pay that time. If they decided to go Dutch before hand she probably would have had the purse on her. Sounds to me like op is cheap, look at the clues. She probably got fed up with it.
schaflava 0
maybe they told her it wasn't organic and she freaked!
Iknoweverything 29
I agree and I disagree. Guys should offer to pay the first date, and offer to pay for the first few dates. But usually a paying idea is put out in advance. So if she had decided she was treating, it would be mildly rude for him to insist on it. (And bitchy of her to break up like that) However, if OP had wanted the date, and his girlfriend was always treating, he kind of deserved it... then again, every relationship dynamic is different.
Ratdaddy94 0
Rattus, I am ashamed to have a name similar to yours. Men are expected to pat for things because most men are the primary income provider in a relationship. L2notbeabitchwhothinksallmenseewomenasproperty.
iwishicould 7
woww, all the people I've met at subway were really cool...
awardZu 0
#179, did your space bar break?
zrzr1988 0
it's the 21 century! Women are capable to pay for their own meals, they don't need men to pay for them.
rattusrattus 18
Ratdaddy, I am ashamed to share a name with someone who fails basic reading comprehension. I said 'in the past'. I wasn't suggesting 'women are property' is a widely-held modern attitude in western society. Additionaly, many households are dual income. So the 'men should always pay' line of thinking is a little outdated.
FajitaFreak 3
Why should a guy have to pay the first date? I never understood this antiquated social ritual. We are expected to take the risk in asking the girl out. Fine. We are expected to decide where to go on the date. Fine. We're expected to be interesting, manly, look and smell good (just like the girl) and sexual performance stress is all on the guy. If a girl is hot she can just lay there and the guy will get off easily. No, for a guy, there's so much technique and skill involved it's ******* ridiculous. If you fail, she dumps you and grab onto another one of the hundred of branches out there. Even an average looking girl gets hit on at least once a week. So, on top of ALL of this, we're expected to pay for everything to. What. The. ****? Yes, if you did not notice, I'm extremely bitter.
Iknoweverything 29
322, it's called chivalry. Which apparently, YOU don't have. Your women just lie there because you wanted sex without "wooing" her, so they don't feel obligated to make it interesting. (I really hate bitter guys... obviously they don't feel like making women feel appreciated.) P.S. Most women still bring enough money to pay for a first date. But they still expect you to at least offer.