By happybirthday - 12/08/2012 05:49 - United States - Wrentham

Today, I found the perfect opportunity to throw my husband a surprise party since he thought I was away on a business trip. He came home with a hooker. Surprise! FML
I agree, your life sucks 52 529
You deserved it 3 466

Same thing different taste

Top comments

What a douche. He was more than lucky to have someone as compassionate as you. Oh well, his loss.

I think you have another surprise for him right? Like some papers..


What a douche. He was more than lucky to have someone as compassionate as you. Oh well, his loss.

AbstraktThoughts 13

Come back with divorce papers. Surprise! :)

UrCapsLockOn 12

so he got a surprise party and a hooker .. WIN

pavlovaaLOVE 7

8- I'm pretty sure it will come as no surprise ... The prick deserves it. Fyl op :(

Probably not his first time. You may wanna go to the doctor and make sure you don't get another surprise down the road.

perdix 29

#1, I don't know about compassionate. I feel that surprise parties are creepy. If your friends and family can pull off a vast conspiracy to ambush you for your entertainment, imagine what they could do behind your back for other purposes!

90 You can't dump a husband, you can divorce him though.

stephhrunsaway 21

At least all the guests witnessed his horrible attempt at adultery. He won't get any supporters there.

iHeartRKO 5

That awkward moment when 1's picture scared the shit out of me.

Dragunov95 1

102- Yes, she can actually dump her husband. For instance she can dump his body into a river, a dumpster, the ocean, etc. The list goes on but by no means is that man not dumpable. (Yes I did just make dumpable a word)

Cheating is wrong and so is havin a relationship with someone you don't even love or this incident wouldn't happen.

Perdix im pretty sure your the best FML commenter ever on FML. thumbs up if you agree?

#112 I don't think you have much room to talk about someone having a "scary picture"...

hwkfan1 10

Maybe you could get her to jump out of a cake?

This may be the definition of awkward..

It could've been worse, like if the hooker was actually a man...or was she?

18- Cheating is cheating. Whether it be with a man or woman, it doesn't make it right either way.

KommanderKush420 5

Imagine what the hooker was thinking...

74: Yes, cheating is cheating, but I'm fairly sure a male hooker would be more awkward. (Though I suppose he could say they're for her, but that would still be more awkward in my opinion.)

I think you have another surprise for him right? Like some papers..

xMiss_Maggot 7

i wonder if he does this when youre away from your business trips..

Yourheadache 19

Maybe MissMaggot tried to say: 'I wonder if this is the first time he brought a hooker home when you're away'. Anyway, OP should certainly have herself checked on STD's.

JessieLoren 5

you should give him another surprise.. a divorce!

Not the duck face! Nooooooooooo!!!!!!

Why the duck face?!!?? Why?! WHY?! WHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????

Nymphetamatrix 19

*Clicks rifle and aims* This is gonna be one might good duck stew.

jarockstar27 10

That wouldnt be much of a surprise at this point....

Sorry about this but "opportunity" is spelled wrong. On another note, I'm sorry for you :[

I noticed that too, but I felt if I pointed it out it would be rude. Thanks for doing that for me (:

11- It wouldn't of been rude if you had put it nicely....

alshygirl 14

It actually is spelled correctly. Check it out before you comment.

38- Actually, FMLs are posted THEN checked for grammar/spelling errors, so when #7 had read the FML (and several others) it was spelled incorrectly, but at the time you had finally got around to the FML, it had been grammar checked.

r0bin_fml 3

No, 'wouldn't have' is wrong! Otherwise it be read: 'It would not have of been rude... etc', instead of just, 'It would not of been rude...etc'. :)

No um they meant instead of saying "of" you should have said "have" aka: "It wouldn't have been rude" when you speak it sounds a little like you say "wouldn't of"

Let's have a grammar lesson, shall we? Of is not a possessive or past tense term. Of is a reference term. Have is either possessive or referring to a past event that one should HAVE done. "should of" : What? What is "of" of? A race of nymphomaniac penguins? Now, when "have" is too long, we make what is called a contraction. After all is done, we get "should've" .

Free sex just wasn't enough for the Fool.

Of course "free sex" isn't really free you know. There is providing a house, food, clothes and the rest of it.

Yourheadache 19

No you fool, you dont have to live together to have sex...

pupsi 3

Yaaa just pay some money on prostitute house hahha

22 What makes you think he provides all that for her? He thought she was on a business trip. She sounds like an executive or a salesperson.

iHeartRKO 5

Seriously 25 I'm starting to think you really look like that.

22- Not all men pay for the women's needs, hell there are times when I had to pay for my boyfriend, so no, not all (there are most certainly more than, as a woman I would like to mention... For shame ladies!!) women are gold diggers like men assume them to be. Honestly, I'd rather pay for my own stuff so when it comes to a divorce or break up, I won't lose my crap.