Kinda cute

By anon - 09/09/2013 15:15 - United States - Mantua

Spicy
Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. - Mom and Dad." FML
I agree, your life sucks 62 279
You deserved it 25 913

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Or you could just use your hand which is free ! :D haha

give it back and tell them to buy headphones

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Or you could just use your hand which is free ! :D haha

Now works without batteries! Buy one get one free!! :p

Actually, you don't have to buy at all! You already have two... I hope. :|

That was kinda the joke... :/

The joke is only funny if you're not an amputee. If you are then I sincerely apologize. >.>

jasmine2301 25

Duh guys! #38 was trolling!

I'm assuming that you are a guy. One's hand just can't always compete with or fulfil a gal the way a vibrator can.

You're a guy, you don't get it. Once I switched to using a vibrator, my hand just didn't do it for me anymore.

my hand doesnt work fir me very well.. i have small hands

Lol. Awesome mom and dad you have there! Hahaha.

She should slip a not under their door saying "I need 20 more dollars, vibrators are expensive."

Oh the embarrassment D; At least they didn't walk in on you, and had the courtesy to slip you a note ;)

I was thinking the same thing!

give it back and tell them to buy headphones

I don't think they're going to want to listen to music to cover up some smaller noise when they are trying to sleep...

then noise cancelling headphones?

Those usually don't work that well when there's no music playing.

Why give it back? Keep the money and slip a note.

Free money? Your life is definitely not fucked :p

Looks like your parents are buzz kills

I see what you did there

Sigh... We all did, 22.

God dammit, 22. This is why people born in 1998 shouldn't be here.

Guys give 22 a break. he's new.

This has nothing to do with anything here, 40, but 14 siblings? My god. How have you not, you know, ended it yet? lol.

#40 I see you're new too. Also, the whole "give so-and-so a break" doesn't fly here either. People have to learn the ropes somehow.

I have never seen a place more filled with sarcastic, egotistical assholes. Glad to see a place I belong in. But damn...

It'd be pretty boring if the only comments were "Awww, I'm so sorry to hear that happened to you. Things will get better! xoxo" Just like it gets boring constantly having someone tell us that they "see what you did there." Being a sarcastic asshole is way more fun.

@36 I'm more inclined to blame it on the fact that he is a ginger... But that's just me.

It feels like home, 98. It feels like home.

I mostly visit FML to read comments made by cynical, sarcastic, and clinically narcissistic members.

And there is those retards who vote down a sarcastic vote because they are too stupid to understand it and take it as a rude conment

obviously 40s mom didn't need a vibrator

$30? Hell, a dildo only costs $8 or $10! According to my research, with that much dough you should be able to afford the Anal Violator 5000XXL. It may not be that quiet, but you surely will NOT be. Enjoy!

We need Boners here for his expert opinion.

Please tell me where you buy yours, because here a basic one costs MORE than that. ^^

Yeah Doc, tell everyone where you buy your dildos.

I hear the hospital's sexual dysfunction ward gets a great bulk discount...

I get mine from hospital Lost and Found. A few wipes with industrial strength cleaner and they are good to go. I mean, what dildos? I don't have any dildos!

Any good VIBRATOR is going to cost anywhere between $50-$100+.

i work at an adult toystore. Anything $30 with thay kind of name isn't worth it.

walgreens has them for under 30$ o3o

I feel like it would be really awkward to buy a dildo at Walgreens.

Just plop a 12" dildo on the counter and try to hold eye contact

that is why you can get them off their site too so the akwardness isn't there..or check groupon too XD

Pink cherry is the best source for cheap quality sex toys. If anything is defective they will exchange or refund it. Refunds arrive in less than 24 hours. They also indicate the noise level on many of their products. Op should really shop there... And no I don't work for them... Just a very... Satisfied customer :p $10 dildo? I got mine for $5 if you wait for their sales. The $10-15 vibes I got there are better made than the piece of crap $50 vibe I got from OhMiBod. Yes I have no shame. I used to do sex toy reviews. :p hopefully that info helps people anyways.

Good advice

what is this thread

Well that's awkward... At least they gave you money

At least they didn't give you any bad vibes over it.

Just buy a premium dildo with that money

Dude, you're 14. Why are you even on this site?

Because its a free website with no age control on who can sign up?

I heard the lipstick vibrator is very discrete

Did a "friend" tell you that? ;)

i had the lipstick one. wasnt any quieter than any other bullet but was good for the price.

Or the pocket rocket.

#33 haha google did. I have the 'rabbit ear' tho but er never mind