The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year

The all-time greatest FMLs

Charming

By Anonymous - 02/12/2023 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, a girl I met on Tinder described herself as curvy and sent me pictures. We agreed to meet and let me say… those pictures were at least 10 years and 15 stone ago. She was no longer curvy or even just overweight, she was grossly obese. I could smell the unwashed skin under her fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 151

Awkward

By Anonymous - 29/03/2021 00:30

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to cuddle as we usually do. To prepare for this, the first thing I always do is dive into bed. This time, I felt something squishy under the covers, and screamed when I saw it was a Fleshlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 922

Mr Rogers

By Anonymous - 29/11/2023 05:00

Today, I met my upstairs neighbours in person. They had been having vigorous sex and all of a sudden I heard a loud, “OH SHIT” and they both fell through the ceiling and ended up on top of me on my sofa, covered in plaster and dust, and stark naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 162

Every day is Caturday

By I told you - 03/06/2023 18:00 - United States

Today, my parents got a cat tree for my cats. I tried to tell them it was way too small, but they ignored my protests. Lo and behold, it's way too small. My cats have already fallen down trying to get on it at least three times each. even though one of them is abnormally small. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 166

I knew it!

By Singleforever - 21/02/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, my ex-husband listed himself as “In a relationship” with the co-worker he constantly reassured me not to worry about on Facebook. The ink on our divorce paperwork hasn’t even dried yet. We had an amicable divorce because he “just wasn’t feeling it anymore.” Now I know why. I’m sick to my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 122

Tonight, on 'First Dates'…

By Anonymous - 17/04/2024 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, so… you know how sometimes girls give the weird guys a chance and it works out beautifully and they marry, have kids, and live happily ever after. Yeah, didn’t work for me. I gave the weird guy from work a chance and he asked if he could lick my armpits on the first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 139

I just want to go to bed

By Jay Stevens - 22/02/2023 06:00

Today, it's 1 a.m. and once again a freaking bird has flew into my house from the attic. My cats are of course all crazy right now as it sits in my room, in a high corner beyond reach. My children are sleeping and I have no way to let it outside from where it is right now. Oh and it's freezing outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 130

Frazzled

By Stressed - 17/10/2023 07:30 - United States

Today, at the ungodly hour of 11 PM, my dad called to tell me he was driving my mom to the hospital because she was having breathing problems. It turned out to be nothing serious, but my brain decided to freak out anyway, effectively making me unable to fall asleep. Now, I have to go to work like this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 285

My house, my rules

By lordoftheweird - 06/01/2024 15:00 - Canada - Kamloops

Today, I had to make a house rule for my extended family who live with me: No more incestuous sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 149

Disproportionate response

By Anonymous - 09/09/2023 04:00

Today, my girlfriend asked me to lick her ass. I obliged, only for her to rip a rancid fart directly on my tongue. Its been two hours and I'm still nauseous. Apparently, this was revenge for my "badgering her" for anal sex. I'd mentioned that butt play is one of my kinks, and dropped it when she wasn't interested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 217

Playing favorites

By So sick of disrespect - 21/01/2026 22:00

Today, I was making dinner for my family while my wife was at work. She walked in the door with McDonald's, even though she knew I was cooking. Then our kids saw and started screaming that they wanted McDonald's too and that it was unfair. I've told her not to pull this shit and she won't listen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 73

Oh, the humanity

By Anonymous - 23/03/2023 18:00

Today, I was giving a presentation at work but accidentally spilled water all over my laptop. I tried to dry it off, but it wouldn't turn on. I had to give the presentation awkwardly using my phone and everyone took the piss out of me and my shoddy performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 261

Overruled

By Anonymous - 28/12/2020 22:58 - Germany

Today, I told my dogs to go to their dog beds. The small dog went onto the big one’s bed. The big dog went onto my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 266

Kinda effed up

By Anonymous - 03/06/2024 20:00 - Canada - Laval

Today, my sister is a murderer but my family admitted they prefer her over me. I had to move to a new city to get away from the media and drama, I have no friends, and the only family who calls me is my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 92

Deity business

By Anonymous - 12/02/2024 00:00

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years donated his promise ring at the temple for it to be used to construct the idol's feet. The problem is that I made that ring for him from scratch and he didn’t even have it for 2 months. He was excited when he told me, and doesn’t understand why I’m upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 166

Good boy

By Anonymous - 11/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my mom bought me a puppy. I’m single, I work 14 hour days, my life is in no way suitable for pet ownership, but mom won’t take him back because she thinks I need to learn adult responsibility. I’m a senior technician with a team of 17 people, I couldn’t be more responsible if I tried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 625

You deserved it 107

Flustered

By Sara Princess - 09/04/2023 02:00

Today, as I was about to get onto the bus, my bus pass fell out of my hands. Being in a rush, I barely picked it up from the street not having a good grasp of it, just to have it fall again as I was about to swipe it. It felt like the whole bus was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 231

Another betrayal

By Anonymous - 14/03/2025 12:00 - United States - Niles

Today, I found out that my fiance has been cheating on me. We have an 8 month-old baby together. I've been trying to help him get sober again and have done my best to be a great partner, but apparently some other girl is more important than the family he was creating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 140

By hanenhh - 01/12/2013 10:58 - Tunisia

Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me, but the only one I own has grey skulls printed on it. Yes, she took it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 64

Office politics

By Anonymous - 04/06/2024 00:00

Today, I was turned down for a promotion because of complaints on my file. I’d never heard of them, so I demanded to see them. Every complaint was filed in the last six months and signed by either him or the other manager who doesn’t like me. Guess who got promoted instead? His “secret” side chick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 84

Reflex

By Lance - 07/07/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I realised that I have been a teacher for far too long when I told a random stranger I saw at the mall to tie up their shoelaces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 242

Can't we all just get along?

By Anonymous - 20/07/2023 03:00

Today, while celebrating my birthday, my family found time after a few drinks to start at least one argument, if not more, and drove me to biting my nails off. I don't even remember the last time that happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 157

Goofs and gaffes

By Chelsea - 23/02/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 249

The blame game

By Anonymous - 09/11/2024 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife is mad because she forgot our anniversary. Not me, her. She thought it was today and got mad at me for having nothing planned. It’s tomorrow, and I do have stuff planned for us. So she’s mad at me because she got it wrong and felt like an idiot, which is somehow my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 92

My life is a romcom

By Lucky girl - 23/08/2023 04:00 - Canada

Today, I was at a friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. Everyone cheered, until I slipped on the flowers and fell flat on my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 127

WTF doc?

By Anonymous - 20/11/2023 21:00

Today, my doctor confirmed I’m pregnant, but she phrased it as, “I’ve got some bad news for you, you’re pregnant.” I could be wrong but should a health professional automatically assume a pregnancy is unwanted? Plus she’s spent months helping us with fertility advice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 145

Blame game

By Anonymous - 05/04/2024 06:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad tried to blame me for ringing an out of network number for two hours, which charged his bill by the minute. I rang the number, which turned out to belong to one of his business pals who lives abroad. He punished me anyway for having an attitude when I proved the call was his fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 109

Monday morning sucks

By Linds - 28/06/2021 14:01

Today, I came home to find that maggots had taken over my garbage can this weekend. We weren't home to catch it, and I didn't use the garbage this morning. On top of that, I hadn't had my caffeine for the day because I ran out and forgot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 293

No time to be joking around

By Anonymous - 04/04/2023 02:00 - United States - Omaha

Today, I had to have two stents removed from having kidney stones, so I was strapped down to a table. The doctors were guys. I said, "I’ve had this dream before, but you two weren’t in it." I didn’t realize the female nurse was still there. It took them quite a while to stop laughing before they started.. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 377

Not cool, Mom

By Anonymous - 10/05/2024 22:00

Today, my mom still spends time with my ex because, as she puts it, we might be divorced now but there’s no reason they can’t still be friends. This is the woman who tricked me into raising another man’s baby for three months before I got suspicious and got a paternity test. Screw you mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 118

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Family Love Poopoo peepee Awkward Money Annoying Raining Work Health Painful Medication Miscellaneous Relationship advice Relatable AITA Mental health Psychology Cats Animals Allergies Cheating Kids Weddings Drunk Embarrassing Singing Sports Furniture Transportation Airplanes

The Top

Today, I met with a student in office hours to discuss an assignment when my nose started bleeding. I didn't know at first, so I blew my nose and an inhuman amount of blood sprayed out the side of the tissue all over my desk, the wall, and the student's paper. It looked like a murder scene. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 375

You deserved it 1 470

Today, I brought a boy home for the first time, only to have my dad ask him what his mother's maiden name was. When he answered, my dad exclaimed, "Oh yeah! I think I dated her in high school. I could be your father!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 711

You deserved it 1 852

Today, my boyfriend thought I was going to ask him if we wanted children together. Instead of talking about it, he pretended to have a violent seizure and die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 977

You deserved it 2 659

Today, I took my friend to the E.R. for an eye infection. While waiting, I proclaimed, "Why, Jesus?!" jokingly. Well, the gigantic biker sitting next to me, who had found religion in prison and is a born again Christian, was not pleased. He spent the next four hours trying to convert me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 581

You deserved it 19 269

Today, the guy I really love, and who apparently loves me too, told me he just can’t be with me because he’s moving away to buy an oyster farm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 926

You deserved it 100

Today, I woke up early for a job interview. I got lost and arrived an hour late, only to find out it was the wrong day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 713