By rochellamaya - 02/09/2011 12:47 - Canada

Today, working as a nurse, I asked a 61-year-old patient if he did any physical activity. His reply was, "Well, I do masturbate a lot". He then went on to describe the various techniques he uses. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 272
You deserved it 4 267

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RouletteRed 6

He's builing up those arms! =D

iAmScrubs 19

Wait for him to demonstrate the interpretive dance masturbation.


RouletteRed 6

He's builing up those arms! =D

Did You make notes?

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

Haha sounds like the type of old man my husband will be. I an going to be the old lady who shits on new nurses arms during my diaper change(reference to previous FML). ...Can't wait...

I bet he can benchpress 265 5 times

LiveLaughFML 10

if grandma isnt going to help grandpa and his needs, grandpa's gonna do it himself! xD

1- Gotta strengthen that wack-off muscle like a champ. You lose power when you start getting old.

RouletteRed 6

Exactly! Lol

LostSaiyan 3

Carpel tunnel FTL

xoconnie 8


I didn't think medical workers were allowed to share patient information...

enonymous 8

Anyone else have MJ's "beat it" while sharpening the pork sword or is it me?

ashhxoxo 14

If they don't say names, you're all good. Names are strictly forbidden. :)

I think the real question is, is did she show him any new ones?

kelsey_katie 17

like a boss.

It seems OP *sunglasses* asked for it.

Well op you live in Canada

Jrefinne 7

That actually burns calories.

Of course it does. Even sleeping burns calories.

It doesn't burn that many calories though.

28 - Thanks for the extra information no one needed.. And I would like to know this general of jacking's styles of self pleasure.

Then I have burn tons of calories

Beebow_fml 5

28- By the looks of your picture, you just need to do it more.

iAmScrubs 19

Wait for him to demonstrate the interpretive dance masturbation.

A mix of feet & hands can never be bad.

You did ask.. :P

did you learn anything?maybe something new for your bf?

Well what were those techniques? We all could learn a couple of new tricks from a veteran like him.

Well, get a pen and paper these techniques could be useful.

50 ways to love your lever.

lliki 0

Do his forearms impress you?

He must have used Viagra

I doubt it. It's one of those /use it or lose it/ muscles. Men can have sex well above their prime if they keep a steady sexual appetite. Just think of Pablo Picasso (what a horn dog without Viagra)(:

ShroomsOnAcid 16

Hey, that's Ernest Borgnine's self confessed secret to a long, healthy life! Let the man be!

Always the tone of surprise, eh Alan?

*imagines mermaid man masturbating*

Hey, that can be a good exercise for someone his age. And it's enjoyable too :D