By Anonymous - 30/10/2011 08:38 - United States
Same thing different taste
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Bad timing
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Gold digger
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Get out of there!
By Anonymous - 21/04/2021 15:30 - United States - Durham
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Comments
Wow what a jerk. Dump his ass.
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Show it anyway![](/images/default-avatar.jpg)
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Show it anywayYeah why rat you out? :D
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Show it anyway53- not really, it means that you can laugh about something in front of a group of people you'll never see again.
Next time you're in a store Op, be the 1st to loudly say to him "I'm sorry about your problem last night sweetie, but I'm sure the doctors can prescribe those little blue pills for you" that outta shut him up.
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Show it anywayI can't believe so many people don't find this hilarious. my girlfriend and I screw with eachother like this all the time, plus the peoples reactions are classic.
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Show it anyway123 Relax.
123 you are what we that are amoral like to call a "self righteous douche bag". Also your reasoning is that because he assaults someone the solution is then to "take him outside and beat the shit out of him" that's some pretty cool logic you got going there.
#17 Did you just call yourself a dick? :D
75- Obviously you're not a genius. OP didn't steal anything, her boyfriend just says that she doea.
123- the only thing you're gonna beat the shit out of is your dick.
I'm pretty sure shell see that group of people again if she always goes to that grocery store
Because she definitely can't get arrested for him making them think she's stealing.....
Funny as hell!
#122, with you and your girlfriend, it's pretty clear that you're screwing around with each other. In OP's situation, she's not finding it as hilarious as either of you do (maybe she did once, but now it's just gotten old - you never know). It seems to me that the boyfriend knows that, yet he keeps doing it to her. That's why a lot of us aren't finding it funny.
145 who us the "we" you speak of, talk for yourself some people might actually think Keyman is doing something respectable, like me, I ******* hate it when anyone in a relationship gets abused, male or female, physically, or emotionally. I was once in a relationship where I was being emotionally abused and it drained the life out of me. I respect you Keyman, keep on keeping on.
Well then I guess your a dick too
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Show it anyway283- You need to take your own advice and chill out bro o.O who are you to openly judge a person's relationship of which you know nothing about anyways? No relationship is perfect so get over yourself.
276 I said we that are amoral. So that is the "we" that I was talking about.
I can't believe how many people on here are dumb, why ydi for not dumping him, its not your business or your life so quit telling people what to do, you amoral creeps
331 stop commenting.
@283 Hey, I'm not whiny and I'm certainly not a ****. GOOD DAY SIR But seriously, I constantly tease people I know and I have an appreciation for dry humor and sarcasm. But humor is a two-way street and if the OP is not laughing, her bf needs to cut it out. Not to mention that yelling "DON'T MAKE ME HIT YOU" and "I SEE YOU PUTTING THINGS IN YOUR PURSE" is actually pretty immature and if the wrong people hear it, there can be serious trouble. If your idea of humor is to yell inappropriate, immature lines then go for it, I won't judge you. But get off your high horse and remember that criticizing the OP's bf doesn't mean we're the fun police. Most of us just have other methods of humor. BTw, I agree completely with 310. Listen to her.
EDIT: Sorry I meant 315 and I ran out of time to edit.
I apologise for my lack of spelling and sentence structure, but writing paragraphs on the iPod is very difficult. I am the chillest person anyone will meet. I didn't even read your entire novel there. What I'm saying is why are you going out with someone that completely does not understand your silly sense of humour. I mess around, if your serious all the time and expect perfection that is where arguments begin.
"NO I WILL NOT MAKE OUT WITH YOU!" Seriously though, instead of bitching and moaning just kill him at his own game; ie, pull a security sensor off of something, stick it to him, and then when the alarm goes off just look at him and yell "DAMMIT BABE, NOT AGAIN!"
We don't think it's so funny
What a dick.
Well first off if he actually hits you leave him and get a friend to **** his shit up. And stealing is bad so don't do that.
If someone won't stand up for themselves then they don't deserve To have anyone do it for them
Say "Don't make me kick your ass again"
112 what if he is much bigger than her and he'll just hurt her again
Standing up for yourself doesn't mean violence.it's possible to simply leave if it was a violent situation.
No, say "I'll stick that candle in your ass like last night honey."
That's when you reply "It's not my fault that you can't satisfy me."
You guys are stupid.
You guys are stupid...it's a JOKE. No girl is gonna find a guy who's always sweet and loving to her like in the movies. And if a guy does act like that, he's probably gay
What did you see in him again...?
If that is what he calls hitting on you or making a move, dump his ass.
It could've been worse," lets Letzeburgesch while getting a hunsbygunon for our yishrupshis"
What?
Exactly
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Show it anywayLOL at your failed attempt at humor.
There the sane person.. Someone's lonely
Don't worry 4 we have the same sense of humor. It's just too bad that all the people on fml are the normal people. I thought better of you all.
Lol I agree he sounds hilarious... I would do the same haha! Except I probly wouldn't say anything about hitting her lol
She deserves to get hit for staying with the guy.
Tell him to shut his mouth.
TIL i am a dick for finding something funny. I didn't realize i was hurting someone.
my husband loves to yell "rape" when we are in the store.
Your husband sounds like a twelve year old.
Hahaha I do this all time at school when my friends piss me off XD
well that must look great in front of people
Next time say this out loud "You had sex with a 13 year old?"
DO IT!!!
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Wow what a jerk. Dump his ass.
What did you see in him again...?