Today, my son hit my husband's shop-vac while pulling into the garage too fast. He was grounded for 3 days. Later, while trying to demonstrate how to park safely, I hit my husband in his happy sacks with the mirror. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was backing out of the my work's parking lot, I hit my boss's truck. While he was in it. FML
Today, my son thought he'd take my new car for a drive without permission. He accelerated straight into a tree, reversed into a lamppost and then accelerated again into the neighbours car. FML
Today, my son tried to swat a fly with a hammer. Our apartment walls are now littered with dents and holes. FML
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Today, after a relaxing week away, my husband and I came home to discover our 17 year old son crashed one of our cars against the other. FML
Today, I let my son take my car out for a spin, since he just got his licence. He didn't make it out of our street before totaling it. FML
Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML
Today, I asked my wife to keep our toddler confined while I hung a shelf. Of course, she didn't, and he came in and picked up a screwdriver. I tried to take it away, and he ran off giggling, only to trip and slice his forehead open. According to my wife, this is entirely my fault and she is taking him to her mom's. FML
Today, I got home from a week-long vacation with my friend's family. When I got back home, I found the garage door had been completely demolished. My uncontrollably drunk dad blamed me. I don't even drive. FML
Today, my mom let my younger brother borrow my car. He managed to crash it through the garage door. While I was in another country. Somehow, I manage to get berated by my mom because I'm not doing enough to make my brother feel better about him having an accident involving my car and my house. FML
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Top comments
conan6 0
YDI for using the phrase "happy sacks"
letitbe56 0
YDI for grounding your son for something that could have happened to anybody.
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Comments (206)
iFruit 0
Stupidest fml everrr.
JillianIsLoveee 0
"Happy sacks?" Are you sure you're mature enough to be married, let alone have a child...?
aznwhitekid 0
poor guy lool
Matty_No9 0
first off iv never known my balls to smile or look anything close to happy come to think of it..and also thats what happens when you have a woman driver haha just kiddin though not all of them are bad i suppose..i hope you un-grounded him or whatnot must have been an extreemly expencive "shop vac" huh, prolly would have had a good laugh at it
gmogos92 0
um.. since he's pulling in and not going fast im sure nothing happened to the shop vac why the **** would you ground him for that??
pleasedonttellme 0
I hope you got grounded
Nakedsquirrel 5
lol
goldenboy_fml 0
learn how to write. i had to read this like 4 times before i understood what you were trying to actually say
doof_fisch 2
Did it wreck your car?
PaulieeBooMN 0
this fml angered me, you are a terrible parent
whatnow444 0
You deserve it for saying happy sacks. Are you an adult or a child? Who talks like that?