By Crispy - 21/06/2009 05:05 - United States

Today, my girlfriend talked me into tanning in a tanning bed for the first time ever. I have never tanned before and didn't know you are supposed to ease into it. I tanned for 15 minutes in the "super bed" and have lobstered. My ass and nuts got the worst of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 17 205
You deserved it 46 031

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Fast track to skin cancer.

that's definitely your girlfriends fault! as a punishment, she will have to walk around next to you :)

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If you tanned like a normal human being that wouldn't happen in the first place... YDI

How does that POSSIBLY make sense?

Is the concept too hard to grasp? He hadn't tanned in a tanning bed before, and he didn't have a clue what he was doing... If he had tanned NORMALLY, as in in the SUN, like a NORMAL person would do, then he wouldn't have burnt balls. D-O Y-O-U U-N-D-E-R-S-T-A-N-D?

Lol! Normal? I'm pretty normal. But I can't tan in the sun. I burnnnn nigga. Tanning booths are just fine. Shut up. x)

You're just as likely to get burnt in the sun.

Lol MeganHOLLYWOOD... You don't have as much melanin in your skin because your of European ancestry which is why you don't get tan in the sun -- You just get burnt. No wonder why you use tanning booths.

yeah which is also why you're not allowed to use the N word.

I'm of european ancestry and I get really tan..

Can you please calm down?

that's definitely your girlfriends fault! as a punishment, she will have to walk around next to you :)

Aww FYL... but YDI!

hahaha wooow im feeling it for your manhood, hahahah

FYL because you look like a lobster, but seriously, you didn't think to ASK how long you should go on it for?

The problem wasn't that he was in there too long; it was that he used a "super" bed when he had never tanned before. I don't get why there are so many YDIs... there's no way he would have known, and either his girlfriend or someone that worked at the salon should have told him.

Fast track to skin cancer.

agreed, I would never use the tanning salon. YDI

why the hell were you tanning naked, instead of wearing a male gstring or something? not to mention tanning beds give a lot of people skin cancer

I agree. You just had radiation beamed into your skin. I'd worry about skin cancer, and then the burned balls and ass.

most people tan naked? no tan lines....one of the points of a tanning bed.

Hey Mr Lobster! Wow, your balls felt the heat? Hopefully your girlfriend will eat your balls like she would eat a lobster to make it up to you.

ouch you mean break everything open and chew on the insides? There's something wrong with you dude. I don't know what type of fetish you have but if I were you, I'd see a psychiatrist. Oh and OP: YDI for not going out to the beach or something

Some aloe vera gently applied to the nutsack will cure what ails ya..