By fishwizard - 02/06/2017 20:00

Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks 2 735
You deserved it 3 973
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Top comments

Arashikage 18

Did you not look in the mirror between the time you got out of the tanning bed and when you got to school t

62 1
neuronerd 28

Do you eat a lot of carrots? I've only seen people look orange with spray tans, not natural tans.

43 3

Comments

Arashikage 18

Did you not look in the mirror between the time you got out of the tanning bed and when you got to school t

62 1
tonyfan00 38

Can we please let the joke die? There's no loner even a dead horse to beat anymore; it's been disintigrated by everyone by now.

4 1
neuronerd 28

Do you eat a lot of carrots? I've only seen people look orange with spray tans, not natural tans.

43 3
species4872 19

A tanning bed is not a natural tan.

2 7
neuronerd 28

It is in the sense of the fact that it's UV rays causing damage to the cells and affecting melanin production. Indoor and outdoor tanning use the same mechanism and are both harmful.

17 0
species4872 19

Err no, not in a sense it isn't. Natural light, different spectrum, different intensities of "light" within that spectrum. Our bodies have evolved to natural light and produce melanin at a certain rate in response to natural light. Tanning beds have enhanced UV spectrum output which is inherently much higher than the production of melanin can cope with, which is why tanning beds are much more destructive. In short one would have to be an idiot to use one.

4 4
neuronerd 28

Incorrect. Tanning beds use primarily the UVA spectrum with some UVB, both of which are present in sunlight. Visible light, also in sunlight, does not produce the tanning reaction. You are correct that a greater amount of UVA rays are emitted than when exposed to natural sunlight, hence why a tan develops in minutes, not hours, but it is the same biochemical mechanism. You're arguing semantics at this point, as I'm sure you're well aware the difference I was pointing out was between natural as a physiological reaction vs basically dying the skin with a spray tan. I realize you're trying to sound intelligent, but you're being more pedantic.

6 1
species4872 19

My initial comment was solely directed to your reference to natural tans, not spray tans and your second comment implied that there was no difference between tanning from sunlight or a tanning bed apart from the fact that both are harmful. My second comment was in reply to the before mentioned statement pointing out that the UV output of tanning beds is such a high level in respect to natural light that their use is highly destructive as opposed to natural light. Hardly a pedantic distinction considering that there are still many unaware of the dangers that tanning beds, (even used properly), pose.

1 3
logank013 20

Good news is summer break is coming up soon. Give them some time to forget about this.

7 0
laowang 13

Tell me plz，what does COVFEFE mean？

2 6
Royness 8

Covfefe is what you exclaim when you drop your phone in the toilet

3 4
klutzyduck1 24

You must have also used a tanning cream with a bronzer, the bronzer is what would turn you orange. I think you're leaving out some bits, most likely you've tanned before and the bronzer cream has built up enough it looks obviously orange. Otherwise, if this was the first time, even at 9 minutes, it would be likely you'd burn a bit (hence the low max time). The new beds are extra powerful. So, if you don't want to look like an umpa-lumpa, either don't use a cream or use one without bronzer. However, tanning beds are terrible for you skin. Your face will thank you in ten years if you just stop.

15 1
DataWog 30

I've used a bronzing lotion exactly once in my life, just for ***** & giggles. It didn't turn me orange, but for some reason it seemed to work more on the main skin colour than on my freckles... so for a couple days, instead of being white with brownish dots, I was brownish with white dots.

2 0
HollywoodUndeadL_fml 2

idk who the **** let you go in for that long. you're supposed to go for like 4 minutes at a time at first. like gradually work up or you can do bad damage or burn and go orange..

9 0
RockPrincess26 16

I heard that bathing with lemons helps to take off the bad coloring.

2 0
Taurus_ChicKa 36

You never start on the max setting your first time. You always start at like two minutes and work your way up to a longer duration. But really, tanning is overrated. Melanoma is a serious disease, FYI.

7 0
Sertorius 10

Commercial operation of tanning beds is prohibited in Australia, for good reason. They are extremely carcinogenic; at a minimum you are significantly accelerating the aging of your skin (ironic that people do it for cosmetic reasons). A tan is your body's response to cellular damage, it is not indicative of good health.

2 0