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By melon squash - Belgium - Kessel-lo
Today, I lifted up a watermelon, not realising it had gone bad. The thing exploded like an alien giving birth. Stinking juice and rotten inside all over the kitchen. Even behind the build-in closets. It smells like rotten fruit cheese and I can't reach behind the closets. FML
I agree, your life sucks
13449
You deserved it
1299
Miscellaneous

Late term

Small town blues

Like riding a bike

By CrappyValentine - Netherlands
Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML
I agree, your life sucks
11328
You deserved it
37779
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Top comments
By  LostInTheZone11  |  28

On the plus side your wording is top notch.

136 4 Reply
By  LyricaSilvan  |  29

That sounds terrible, but I laughed pretty hard at the term "fruit cheese."

I wish you luck getting it cleaned up. You definitely don't want that smell sticking around.

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COMMENTS
By  LostInTheZone11  |  28

On the plus side your wording is top notch.

136 4 Reply
By  LyricaSilvan  |  29

That sounds terrible, but I laughed pretty hard at the term "fruit cheese."

I wish you luck getting it cleaned up. You definitely don't want that smell sticking around.

Send a private message 15 0 Reply
By  klutzyduck1  |  24

Bright side: you could be the next Gallagher. His exploding watermelons don't have anything on your trick! I feel bad, that's going to be awful to clean. And from your description of the grossness, you will probably never eat watermelon again.

Send a private message 9 1 Reply
By  species4872  |  19

You do realize that because of the watermelon escapade most of the audience has now left.

1 5 Reply
By  TabooSushi  |  24

Keep all possible windows/sources of ventilation open for as long as possible for a good while. It's probably the only way the smell will eventually dissipate.

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