By bad in the sack - 05/07/2014 04:26 - United States

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks 55 167
You deserved it 11 465
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

rp713 4

If she was on top she was in control, why should it be your fault?

361 8
MelTheGreat 23

Or maybe she just has different priorities, or A.D.D... But you probably do suck in this case.

202 8

Comments

Wingman527 22

At least she told you in a roundabout sort of way.

160 9
SaturnV 25

Telling him in a roundabout way instead of speaking with him directly about the problem does both partners a great disservice. She may think she's being kind by sparing his feelings, but by remaining silent, both parties are consigned to bad sex (which may manifest itself elsewhere in the relationship) until they sit down like mature adults and resolve their communication problems.

33 3
MelTheGreat 23

Or maybe she just has different priorities, or A.D.D... But you probably do suck in this case.

202 8
friedpwnadge 25

Apply some ice cream to that burn OP.

88 2
Bloink 25

i thought this comment was funny cuz i have ADD plus ice cream is my life, and this is something i could see myself doing, so theres a chance OP!

51 4
whattfreshhhelll 2

or maybe she just really wanted some ice cream....

29 1
Enslaved 36

So when she doesn't scream, she wants ice cream?

71 3
rp713 4

If she was on top she was in control, why should it be your fault?

361 8
gracehi 31

Well, if he was just lying there like a dead fish that would be pretty bad.

109 3
katina1236 20

When the girls on top the guy shouldn't move too much. She knows what she's doing and if he moves too much he throws off her rythm

107 8
gracehi 31

If he does it right, his movement can help. But in any case, he shouldn't just be lying there with his eyes closed like he's asleep. That's definitely a no no.

92 3
djsammyc 19

welcome to fml: where we discuss proper sexual technique

176 2
Soulsbane96_fml 11

Not necessarily a bad thing 35. I'm taking notes. Ladies, feel free to continue and educate us males.

69 4
kelsorg 21

she was probably getting tired and didn't want to admit it. I don't think it was necessarily your fault! fyl though

28 2
SystemofaBlink41 27

It's not called "**** My Life" for nothing!

16 2
birds_fml 7

The man can do plenty when the woman is on top. Rub her clit for one... super easy cause both his hands are free.

19 2
njas113 9

#3 - Someone knows their stuff ^_^

0 1
eleven22 11

Maybe she wanted to use the ice cream...

11 22
Strider207 5

That would be so hot. Pun intended.

2 25
BSnapZ 21

#65 I don't think that actually works as a pun...

21 1
IKickPuppiesHard 16

Atleast eating icecream is less work and less sweat. However in your case i guess you didnt do much work to begin with huh? :/

82 3
annamaria55555 9

Maybe she felt like you weren't enjoying yourself...

92 2
jdogg14 7

It's her job when she's on top, it's not your fault

71 15
gracehi 31

Sex is a joint effort no matter who is on top. The person on bottom should be doing something to encourage the one on top, whether it's moving their hips in sync with the other person, caressing, kissing, talking dirty, a combination of those things, etc.

65 4
GuyNoOneKnows 13

At least she was nice about it..I guess

12 1
garebear61 14

When I am on bottom my girl does most of the work, so if your situation is different hopefully you will follow up and explain??? Anyway, maybe she is just not in the mood for it and didn't want to hurt your feelings by telling you she wasn't in the mood for sex!

29 4
introductionn 13

She could've just figured out that she wasn't in the mood anymore, rather than saying you're bad at sex .. although it could be because you're bad at sex. who knows, it's a two way street

15 2