Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and...

By bad in the sack - 05/07/2014 04:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 159

You deserved it 11 462

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Same thing different taste

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 955

You deserved it 19 161

Bored

By Taylor parsons - 29/10/2010 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 424

You deserved it 7 538

Mr Floppy

By rachiej8 - 10/06/2012 04:13 - United States - Fairlee

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said, "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 980

You deserved it 5 505

Honest

By fml1977 - 04/03/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 371

You deserved it 8 002

By Anonymous - 22/12/2013 08:45 - Canada - Richmond

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 510

You deserved it 16 754

Smooth talker

By ugh - 31/01/2012 00:25 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 955

You deserved it 5 601

By your mother - 13/10/2010 09:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I went out for ice cream. We somehow started talking about which of our relatives had died. Right when she was talking about how her grandfather had died, I started laughing. She had gotten ice cream all over her face. She broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 216

You deserved it 40 480

Miscommunication

By Anonymous - 25/10/2012 05:45 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 689

You deserved it 18 555

Snoozefest

By notsogood - 08/11/2013 20:02 - United States

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 536

You deserved it 19 397

Routine

By youaresodumb - 27/09/2010 04:19 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I finished too quickly and apologized. She said she was used to it by now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 432

You deserved it 34 341

rp713 4

Saturday 5 July 2014 16:41

If she was on top she was in control, why should it be your fault?

MelTheGreat 23

Saturday 5 July 2014 16:40

Or maybe she just has different priorities, or A.D.D... But you probably do suck in this case.

Comments

kaytasha 18

Sunday 6 July 2014 13:13

Its possible she got bored and rather than tell you and hurt your feelings she decided to say it in a roundabout way.

Omniprism 14

Sunday 6 July 2014 18:49

If she was on top then it would be her to suck at sex cause she has control. I would ask her why she did it. Good luck.

fantasyworld 37

Monday 7 July 2014 3:54

She was either hungry or bored. Ice cream does sound good.

KarlwithaK91 12

Monday 7 July 2014 8:49

I agree with #15. try and make her your Sunday dessert. but seriously, it happens to the best of us after a while. perhaps your sex life has become too routine with positions and all that. try doing something different and spice it up. you'll be back on top in no time.

Kylie_Is_Meh 3

Tuesday 8 July 2014 10:43

Or maybe she just wanted some damn ice cream.

miss_amphetamine 24

Wednesday 16 July 2014 4:42

That's what I thought reading this lol...sometimes really good sex makes me hungry for something sweet also for some reason. Happens to my girlfriends too, I don't think OP's gf was trying to insult him.

miss_amphetamine 24

Wednesday 16 July 2014 4:40

Sex makes me hungry lol. Especially good sex, and it's always for something sweet. Sometimes girls hormones **** with our heads and all we can think about is food...I think OPs GF is just being female and I wouldn't take that as an insult. ;)