Mr Floppy

By rachiej8 - 10/06/2012 04:13 - United States - Fairlee

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said, "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 831
You deserved it 5 487
Sex Awkward Intimacy
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Top comments

Pinkfl0yd 9

Doesn't matter; had snacks!

488 4
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ThatGuyRory 9

Ice Cream makes everything better.

379 8
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Comments

ThatGuyRory 9

Ice Cream makes everything better.

379 8
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Dramori 29

What flavour of ice cream?

22 1
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p3mguin 7

Mint chocolate chip. YAY BUDDY!

27 2
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thiscrazything 1

Did you get hard or soft ice-cream?

38 1
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Spicemelon 5

Grown ups get wasted on ice cream

3 11
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aaahhhfire21 0

Hmm next time just blow him guaranteed concrete

4 9
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ssbtoday 3

I guess they both got something soft and creamy that evening.

2 1
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Afish955 3

I wanna get chocolate wasted!

2 0
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bengermin 5

They're from Vermont, the land of Ben and Jerry's! ...I'd bet all sorts of emotions are worked out over ice cream there.

56 0
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awagh666 14

The story goes that ben and jerry tried to get it on, but ended up making ice cream instead. So yeah, ice cream > sex

43 1
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Dylman 6

New version of that song, "birthday sex"

3 17
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ICastillo 24

I bet OP had an ****** in her mouth after eating that ice cream. So it a win win

15 2
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Ray_of_midnight 22

"Doesn't matter, had ice cream"

34 1
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alexm501 0

You're a nice girl....

101 4
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ambowew 7

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
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anoellem 1

Wtf?

65 1
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zachherbert 10

I've reread this six or seven times, and it makes less and less sense...

56 3
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alstbv12 13

It essentially means that ops boyfriend can't get hard for women and that maybe he should try his luck with men...dont worry. I speak the language of the dumb.

74 1
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zachherbert 10

Ahh, a translator.. FML needs more of you.

52 0
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Il_Maestro 6

I think it is also suggesting that that different guy be her own brother. In which case I am inclined to smash my head against hard objects even more.

21 0
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malters 9

36- or just less stupid people

22 0
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folfg0 12

Guys. People like #6 breed, and vote. We are ******........... #6. I have a question. Why.... Are you?

2 1
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Shadomasta 5

6- Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

1 1
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Pinkfl0yd 9

Doesn't matter; had snacks!

488 4
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challan 19

I spit out my juice laughing.

53 6
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Feared 9

But I'm lactose intolerant. Doesnt matter ; had snacks! I just had snaaaaacks! And it tasted so great! Felt so gooooood, yeah... ...

12 70
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reddudeover 2

64 - Trying a leetle too hard, you almost come across as rabid.

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Rocky007 15

Funniest comment I've seen on FML. Nicely played!

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bluekid7 5

Talk about soft-serve

18 0
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RogueWarrior869 23

This is why I wish we could favorite comments. XD You win some internet.

5 0
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miserypoison 13

Erectile dysfunction.

51 26
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UsernameHere234 13

No. This happened to me the first time I had sex. Both me and my partner were virgins and as such we were very nervous about it. Now though I never have a problem and me and her are VERY VERY sexual.

33 3
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123josie123 11

How exactly does one manage to be "very sex" ?

34 1
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sirpantselot 22

I'm stuck at "fairly sex". Need to take the next step up.

17 0
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writergirl23 19

Lol sometimes too much sex can do that too, found it out on our honeymoon. But it is most definitely not erectile dysfunction!

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toooldforthis 19

How old are you? Maybe he needs to see a doctor?

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yoursucklives 36

my boyfriend had a hard time putting it in for the first time too. just try to be as relaxed as you can. aaaaand your solution with the ice cream is genius.

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