By syl - 11/02/2010 06:18 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 272
You deserved it 5 208

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... he seems cool o_O

hahaha that sounds like something my bf would say as a joke lol.. I hope u took it lightly and mucked around with him bak lol


... he seems cool o_O

lol not reali it's jus funny not cool

sounds like a man after my own heart

haha he's genius

responses 0

what does it mean when people say. ^This

means he's doing exactly what we would

haha that's fucking brilliant, I'm naming my dick after someone in the bible sooo many little metaphors.

purplemnm 9

#85 name it Peter since you keep being denied by women :D

are you a Jesus freak?

Zigma_fml 0

@purplemnm: Oh, snap! But seriously, that was brilliant. He'll be on SNL one day.

Let Jesus touch you

so....... did u accept Jesus into your life LMAO

pfunk129 1

Jesus loves all.....including guys.

j0k32r0x 0


that's just funny

how is this an fml?

vrock 0

rotflmfao!!! I like this guy :D

You just need to let Jesus inside you.

herrera_2014 0

I want to be touched by Jesus lmao Jk

haha your bfs awesome love him haha

khloe_sophia 3

Hahaha I actually thinks that's hilarious!!!

106 u are my hero

Spoozie 0

haha!(: that's the shizz!! that's laughable. his penis is a hero!!:D

purplemnm 9

@106 no I'm not I just spent the last three years of school at a Christian high school...I know the bible like the back of my hand

it's brilliant but I can see how it would be annoying

haha ur boyfriend is awesome op

would u rather it be a girls name? like: would u like to be touched by [insert girl name here].

I've heard weirder codes than that one, he now sounds very religious

hahaha that sounds like something my bf would say as a joke lol.. I hope u took it lightly and mucked around with him bak lol

If his junk can't do any miracles exorcise him!

I like your samurai champloo pic <3

quelbaby ur from p.a arnt you

Thanks Xdnurse! That's so cool you know where itz from!!

yesh I'm an anime junkie...;3

lmfao. do it just as a joke I dare you

guess what you think about every Sunday at church xD

Fuckin American...

hes funny lol

hunter989 0

haha hell yeah he sounds like a badass

FYL naaawwss I would hate that, I would be like shut tfu it's a penis not Jesus, aw.

oo but when it goes in ull be shouting the lords name in vain there's no denyin it

don't fuck with Jesus!

hahah. "fuck with Jesus"... I get it :D

HeyThereGorgeous 0

LMFAO all of the above.

Are you retarded? Your grammar and just plain stupidity makes me want to shoot myself. But then I said naaaawww I won't shoot myself. Aw

Foxracingluver 0

omg thtss hilarious..:D lol

ask him if his Jesus would like the same fate as the real one ?

that is lacking wit. I can totally come up with something better than" Jesus spreading his warmth". your boyfriends a retard

do it here.

"let Jesus spread his blessings upon you"

mojo5678 5

Let Jesus inside of you

sugarbabyxoxo 2

haha give your boyfriend my number bahaha! that's funny as f*ck.

I'll call it whatever name that pleases you if it gets your number... and create better inuendos

Okay, let's hear some.

If I call it any pokemon i want... I choose you ________. what!?!??________ is evolving?? _____ use ur hydropump, quick attack, stringshot... ect... the terminator pops cherry... I'll be back done fucking.... hasta la vista baby... kick her out I'll call it moby dick if it catches me that whale few examples I have tons more lmao

LTMcleod 0

Jesus was way better

Me thinks you're not getting that number...

Ajjas013 6

Jesus wants to stay the night.

since when does jesus live in pantss?

get a life!! ^ really guys? y'all go on fml to hit on girls? lmao

hippiechick91 0

Wow 91 no one would ever let you into them in their right mind. Learn some new lines.

Astraea 0

let him in!! ahah your bf is so funny i need one like him :D

If you go to anyone from the church they'll tell you to let Jesus in..