You had enough time to submit this FML though, that's always something!

What does that have to do with not having friends?

I think he meant to comment about the guy with the clingy girlfriend.

or because he is in college, and has time on his hands

This is like that Key and Peele bit

I think #1 is suggesting that free time is an advantage to having no friends.

I'm sure you could make many friends with the promise of a pizza that action.
Sorry, that was a cheesy pun.

I wish could have a cat.

Didn't know people liked getting their eyes clawed out.

That's strange, my eyes are still intact, even after all these years...my cats must be doing something wrong then, by your claims.

My eyes are scratch less! My cats must be broken! :(

the four cats ive had must be horribly messed up because I have no scratched eyes! should I contact my vet? D:

51, your cat is so fat and fluffy! :3

No shame in that; Cats are great listeners. When I was in college I made my best friends when I studied abroad my junior year. Now in grad school I'm still friends with them. It'll happen, OP. Just connect with people with similar interests - Join a club or do a school related activity.

I once turned my en-suite shower on and left the bathroom door open a bit, so the delivery guy didn't think it was just for me.

I once ordered two pizzas because it was buy one get one free. I changed up the toppings so it wouldn't look like it was just for me. But I actually wanted to get two of the same

My cat likes pepperoni too! :D My rabbit prefers a nice vegetarian pizza though.

As long as the cat doesn't like rabbit, everyone is happy.

You didn't have to fake having friends. The pizza guy doesn't judge

unless ur a fat old guy that answers the door in his underwear. I judge that guy every time

It's ok OP, i'd be your friend :)

I was going to say this too! OP, most people suck anyway so don't get too down.

I agree. most people are not worth knowing. They're is no shame in being a lone wolf.

So did the cat want pepperoni or not?

Why did you feel the need to try to impress that guy in the first place? I'm sure he doesn't care if you have friends or not.