Miscellaneous: Today, I was ordering a pizza over the phone. When the guy asked...

By Anonymous - 24/03/2014 20:01 - United States - Denver

Today, I was ordering a pizza over the phone. When the guy asked for my order, I yelled "Hey, you guys wanted pepperoni, right?" In reality, I was yelling this to my cat. College hasn't made me many friends so far. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 560

You deserved it 8 962

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Same thing different taste

Pizzzaaaaaaa

By muzikmaler91 - 15/03/2012 09:45 - United States

Today, I called Pizza Hut to order a pizza. A voice recording was reading me their specials. The man had a horrible country accent so I began to make fun of it. Then I realized it was an actual person on the line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 533

You deserved it 50 076

Classic

By Anonymous - 11/03/2021 16:30 - United States - Enterprise

Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 538

By Musicfreak - 18/12/2011 23:36 - United States

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 622

You deserved it 30 773

Keeping up appearances

By waterpistolriot - 23/10/2020 11:02 - Austria

Today, I ordered food for delivery. I actually made it sound as if there were other people at home so I had an excuse for ordering so much. I don't think they bought it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 836

By lol112 - 02/06/2012 12:47 - United States - Monroe Township

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 797

You deserved it 5 464

By Anonymous - 13/11/2010 22:34 - United States

Today, I ordered a pizza online to be delivered to my apartment. After an hour of waiting, I called the pizza place to ask what the problem was. Apparently, the people at the apartment below me took my already paid for pizza and ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 254

You deserved it 3 084

By pizzagurl - 09/05/2009 04:43 - United States

Today, while working at a pizza shop near a college campus, I got an order to deliver to the dorms. Extremely busy at work and annoyed that someone wouldn't take 3 minutes to walk over, I spat on the pizza. When I arrived to the dorm, a woman in a wheelchair opened the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 190

You deserved it 274 418

By woahheylex - 25/06/2011 14:21 - United States

Today, after ordering pizza, I heard some strange noises coming from my basement so I called the cops. The pizza came fifteen minutes before the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 656

You deserved it 5 350

By Cano951 - 16/12/2011 20:16 - United States

Today, I was bitched out by a pizza delivery man. I didn't have the cash to pay him for a pizza I didn't even order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 383

You deserved it 2 608

By Anonymous - 11/12/2010 07:04 - United States

Today, I was at a house delivering pizza. As I walked away, I heard the mom mutter to her child, "That's why you go to college." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 814

You deserved it 6 203

Pleonasm 35

Tuesday 25 March 2014 0:07

I'm sure you could make many friends with the promise of a pizza that action. Sorry, that was a cheesy pun.

alshygirl 14

Tuesday 25 March 2014 0:09

You didn't have to fake having friends. The pizza guy doesn't judge

Comments

decwalsh4 5

Thursday 27 March 2014 2:07

key and Peele lol

summerblondie12 4

Thursday 27 March 2014 4:21

Well then go out and communicate with people and actually TRY to make friends.. Common sense

rawlings123 17

Thursday 27 March 2014 4:28

Stop being a little bitch. Do you truly think the pizza guy gives a shit if you're eating alone?

someguy314159265 15

Thursday 27 March 2014 6:14

Why do so many people insist on making other people think they have a social life?

nipbiff 3

Thursday 27 March 2014 9:13

I know how you feel dude :/

shutupyou 11

Friday 28 March 2014 4:39

You can do it! Befriend the pizza delivery guy!

skarp333 4

Friday 28 March 2014 13:53

It'll work out be patient

brickboy1 8

Saturday 5 April 2014 13:15

this reminds me of the key and peele sketch.

yzzami 17

Saturday 12 July 2014 5:03

Youre sad and pathetic for doing that. There is no shame is ordering pizza for oneself

kodaxX 8

Thursday 14 August 2014 3:49

Hey, cats make great friends too. They never talk back, and you won't even have to share the pizza!

Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Money Birthday Cute Kids Weird Awkward Love Health Abuse Relatable Social Media Scams Education Parents School Anger issues Teenagers Family Relationship advice Capitalism Miscellaneous Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I've had a crush on a guy for a while - a friend of mine knows this. I finally decided to find out once and for all if there was any chance with him, so I drove to his house, armed with a home cooked meal and wine, only to find the very friend I confided in was at his house. It turns out they are now an item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 152

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 018

You deserved it 3 408

The Top

Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 959

You deserved it 2 298

Today, after I'd being sick all day, my boyfriend volunteered to do my very long sociology paper. I was later notified by my professor that the paper I'd submitted was completely plagiarized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 2 164

Today, I wrote out a note to the guy I liked. I went to hand it to him, but he said, "Sorry, that's not mine," and walked away. I was so nervous, I couldn't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 615

You deserved it 290

Today, I went on a first date. We had the same phone, and we'd put them down next to each other on the table. I get a message and we both look. It’s my period tracker telling me to be careful, because the floodgates are opening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 681

You deserved it 398

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 815

You deserved it 5 160

Today, I was at work at Krispy Kreme for national "talk like a pirate" day. If you dressed like a pirate you'd get a free dozen donuts. A man came in with just an eyepatch on. Thinking he was trying to get a free dozen, I told him he needed to try harder. Turned out the eyepatch was real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 278

You deserved it 13 921

Same thing different taste

Pizzzaaaaaaa

Classic

Keeping up appearances

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