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Tiny Tim

Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML

204

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Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

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Top comments

freshprizzle1 13

My only advice is next time you do the condom shopping lol. Just don't let him see the box so he'll feel like a big boy when it actually fits.

rahrah765765 11

Needle dick.

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Comments (204)

SwagPuppet 3

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Can someone say, needle dick?

rahrah765765 11

Needle dick.

bengermin 5

Can someone say comma splice?

evaki1 12

Comma splice?

KrazieKleo 13

Can someone say something more entertaining than this crap??

ImmaB3AST 7

Something more entertaining than this crap?

SammyS2012 21

When I learned about comma splice, we learned that it was just when commas are incorrectly placed.

monocyte 4

FML is so educational. I learn so much about life and detailed rules of grammar.

gc327072 31

10 just got pwned like a Baustigt.

Futacy 30

Find someone who can fill the condom for real.

ygdrassil 17

This is more like a comma slice.

Dunvanation 4

Can someone say I am sofa king wee Tod Ed?

missalkali 8

I am so funcking retarded. how did I do?

winnerme123 8

131- You are sofa king wee Tod Ed.

astralvagan 20

No, it's not.... Where's there a comma in your sentence?

Dunvanation 4

What a smart ass 141.

csmith10100 4

only FML's is a place where we can all share a laugh and learn how to correctly use commas btw love how everyone is googling comma splices

AKGirlinSD 20

1, it is supposed to be, "Pencil dick."

kikijo 2

Haha! Love it

kikijo 2

If we only had more people like you, we would have much more pleasurable reading. Sadly, you're a minority:(

CettinaMarie 4

Love how it goes from a guy who can't fill in a condom to appropriate grammar. Off topic much? Lol

freshprizzle1 13

My only advice is next time you do the condom shopping lol. Just don't let him see the box so he'll feel like a big boy when it actually fits.

jwidmayer 4

Buy your self and keep the original box. He still think he is stacked and you won't get a disease.

ImmaB3AST 7

Maybe I'm wrong, but doesn't he need to have an std for it to be transmitted in the first place?

Zoh_Aubrey 8

Next time, just laugh at him and I promise he'll find one that fits.

JFurr 9

Or, instead of her buying condoms for him, she could just buy female condoms. That would completely solve the problem.

RacerX1695 1

39 - Everyone knows that pregnancy is the worst STD/STI out there…

darkkisses 6

Yeah I agree with #2. Buy a smaller size and swap them for the bigger. Because they are in the box for the larger size, he wont know, and then no more slipping :) good luck OP. Xoxo Kathryn

j5p332 6

Why is this voted down? It is a perfectly reasonable solution.

JFurr 9

Because people refuse to accept that women can use condoms themselves. To them, it has to be a male condom.

ohSNAPyall 27

Or perhaps because she shouldn't have to handle all the birth control just because her boyfriend is too immature to buy the proper size.

AJE98 5

Don't ever let a broad buy your condoms! Dummest idea ever

Thizzkidsgotgame 7

Its hard to make finger cots seem like a normal size

Thizzkidsgotgame 7

Its hard to make finger cots seem like a normal size

CasperStalks 0

Since when is a pregnancy considered an infection or disease???

Sansa_fml 38

or refuse to have sex until he admits it and buys smaller ones :)

theninja1800 11

At least you aren't pregnant??... Well it doesn't say but I'd hope not

IOmnomHard 10

Yeah I was wondering myself if it slipped off during sex or if it happened when he... :P

Inheritance 10

Considering she probably posted sometime after sex, you have to wait atleast 2 weeks to know if you're pregnant or not. But let's hope OP isn't!

DjeePee 25

I would put more fate on the morning after pill than on hope.

hahasooo 2

As long as he did not cum!

Llamacod 11

wrong 91, you don't have to cum to get someone pregnant. Don't they teach sex ed in school anymore or is it abstinence only anymore?

DogsPaw 16

Sec Ed in school... Interwebz. According to my school semen is blood red. School: 0 Interweb: 1

Inheritance 10

107 your school is clearly retarded

TzHaar_Joh_Zuhai 4

They only teach abstinence

DogsPaw 16

114- I know, it was like 7 years ago.

capper44 18

#97 my school didn't have sex ed, so i am amazed and wondering that could a girl be pregnant without guy shooting his sperm in? :/

itsme1321 3

Capper, when a man gets aroused, he excretes semen (a mixture of sperm and proglastins) that serves as sort of a lubricant for sexual contact. When he penetrates a woman's ******, this "pre-cum", as some call it, enters the woman's uterus through her cervix, thus the potential for conception.

scottish_elf 0

97- I learned that in school, but the whole abstinence only stuff they teach now is ridiculously unrealistic especially with all the ***** in my school

capper44 18

#153 thank u a lots for this info. Damn never knew this deep lol

kayceecakess 7

153- isn't it only possible to get a girl pregnant with pre-cum, if the man had ejaculated before that and hadn't gone to the restroom, leaving leftover baby making juice in his pre-cum? Please correct me if I'm wrong, this is only what I've heard.

psc159 2

171-Peeing doesn''t get rid of all of it, you need to wait a few days (5-7?) before the sperm dies and it's safe to be certain precum may not have sperm... But you should still use a condom.

IOmnomHard 10

Well it's not really an easy thing for a guy to admit to himself. It could be a major blow to the ego. But I still don't think you should have to put up with the fear of it slipping off either. Either have a talk with him about how he needs smaller ones, or just buy them on your own and bring yours out instead when you go to have sex.

wildsweetchild 19

Completely agree. Mans ego is a very fragile thing.

ebonyirony 29

I agree completely. Tell him you need it to fit or you don't feel comfortable having sex with him.

gc327072 31

Hard to admit? Hey world, I ain't the biggest!

jwa2000 3

It sounds like it would be a minor blow.

smb12346 17

What is the point of even using a condom then? If its to big you can still get pregnant and or diseases depending on if he has anything. Tight fit or no go. Maybe get on the pill

rahrah765765 11

Your comment was structured a little awkwardly; giving me the impression you are suggesting that the pill prevents diseases. I not sure you intended that but just to clear it up - it doesn't.

R3TROxLOV3 32

But birth control will only protect her from getting pregnant, not from any STD's or STI's he may have.

smb12346 17

I am aware of that. It was just my wording. Depending on the length of the relationship she may just not want a baby.

BulldogHoops 14

But she would want AIDS?

downtime 13

Yes 73, anyone who has unprotected sex gets AIDS. Thats why both of your parents are disgusting disease laden creatures.

gc327072 31

73- word to the wise, if you're gonna post idiotic comments, don't have a ya don't say profile pic. So much irony.....

mrnuleef 7

Just tell him that you enjoy working with what he's got. Stroke his ego a bit, it'll work. Any dude that concerned with his size like that is bound to succumb to ego strokin. Good luck staying not getting pregnant.

cr3ativity 15

I smiled when I read "stroking" :)

your_face 15

Stroke his "ego," if you know what I mean.

freshberries22 17

You're not going to find too many men willing to admit that they have a small penis and need a smaller size so why don't you buy the condoms in the future and slip it on him while doing a strip tease he will never know the difference

bengermin 5

Gun to my head, I'd admit it...

downtime 13

By that logic every single guy with a tiny dick who has sex and isn't sterile should have a whole lot of kids...

reject214 10

Sounds like a sticky situation. You better shoot over to the local drug store and load up on smaller condoms, otherwise there could be a bump in your future.

kennaem1 11

Buy smaller ones and put them in the bigger box? Or just tell him no sex until he admits the condoms are too big

Ugi 27

Just snip the fingers off latex gloves - four for the price of one! Seriously: not much point in using them if they are going to fall off. If the two of you are serious you could always get tested together and then move onto a different form of birth control. Otherwise you'll have to start bringing your own and insisting he wear them.