Sexy talk

By hamburger - 06/07/2013 21:21 - United States - Adrian

Spicy
Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 334
You deserved it 8 510

Same thing different taste

Top comments

The_Water_Ninja 9

Sounds like we know what's cooking for dinner!

Comments

*SP instructor meme* If you make food references during sex You're gonna have a bad time.

sparky1970 2

Agreed #15. Some guys should just keep their mouth shut during sex. I'm actually surprised she was okay with anal sex. He's obviously done with her ******...maybe.

When the red river flows, take the muddy path.

Uh, yeah thanks for ruining my breakfast.

I don't mind ketchup on my hot dog as long as the bun is tight

asnakelovinbabe 16

Cuz my sperm's so famous, it can make you pregnant in your bum. Jon Lajoie is the man.

"Open up your oven, so I can put my mitts in."

But at the same time VERY different.

The_Piquerist 7

the oven reference is more about the ****** hence the term " bun in the oven," the asshole I guess could be more easily compared to the garbage disposal if we want to keep the kitchen references going.

A garbage disposal is where you shove waste in, so it's more like a blender.

Technically the uterus would be the oven not the ******.

graceinsheepwear 33

45, there is also vaginal fisting.

but we're talking about the back end 71, not the front end. fisting is fisting either way.

PUSSYFACE 13

If the front door is close try the back door.

graceinsheepwear 33

'Cause when I think romance, I think anal.

Ugh, when a guy wants to do that, I pull out my nice big toy "you first"! Funny they just expect us to like it, but get all weirded out about something shoved up their ass. I don't get it

Parkour_rocks 20

Is it even possible to go through with it after such an awful moodkiller? I would be like HELL NO.

This is one thing I don't understand: people *expecting* anal from women. I mean, this is total double standard if you think about it. Most heterosexual men don't want something in their butts, because they want to use their penis to penetrate, and not be penetrated. Similarly, one could argue that most heterosexual women have a predisposition to wanting something in their ******. Not their butts. It doesn't make sense to generalize that women just want to be penetrated and would be totally cool putting something up their butts. I think one could agree that first and foremost, all butts are for defecating. Not everyone wants to go beyond that. It's not fair of (many) men, who mostly aren't interested in being anally penetrated, to expect that women are, especially when dislike is probably for the same reason. While a lot of people are curious and might try it at least once, I think the majority (of those who have and haven't tried) of women does not find this especially awesome. I am going to point out here that I generalize at every point, and that I think anal is just something where opinions diverge a lot, some women are really into it, some occasionally, some not at all. My main point is that it is not appropriate to EXPECT anal as being ok for all women, and that probably too many women are pressured into this without really finding it pleasurable.

I shove things in my boyfriend ass, he shoves things in mine and we both like it. Whoopah, there goes your generalisation of men's sexual activities. This being said, it's not because a guy doesn't like it (which is strange, knowing that they should actually get more pleasure thanks to their prostate), that the girl also doesn't like it. Unless you're completely horrified by the thought of it, just give it a chance.

sammyjanette 17

DJeePee, what are you like the anal advocate? This is like the second comment you've posted in favor of it. Some people don't want anything to do with anal. If someone truly doesn't want to do something then they shouldn't. Also, partners certainly shouldn't try to pressure you into doing something you don't want to do. If they do they're not worth your time.

*ahem* "Unless you're completely horrified by the thought of it, just give it a chance" I believe dj did indeed say that if you're opposed to it, you can just not do it. But what if your partner likes it up the butt and they really enjoy it sexually? You can't just discard the thought of it completely if you've never tried it, if the prospect of really pleasuring your bf/gf is in play. And I agree that pressuring someone into doing it is wrong, but breaching the subject isn't. Couples talk about sex, it's nothing new. Djeepee isn't talking about "anal advocacy" from my point of view, simply that it's important to keep an open mind and remember sex is a two-way street and you have to consider both sides' wants, and needs.

graceinsheepwear 33

38, are you writing a dissertation? Let me just say, as a heteroflexible woman who came of age in the 70s and is still rocking those principles, that a LOT of hetero men (and women) enjoy anal penetration. A lot. You are making assumptions based on your own experiences and preferences (ie, talking out your ass).

I don't think #38's point was people don't enjoy it. I think they were closer to saying that it isn't fair to EXPECT all women to be interested in anal penetration based solely on the fact that they're built FOR penetration. "I am going to point out here that I generalize at every point, and that I think anal is just something where opinions diverge a lot... My main point is that it is not appropriate to EXPECT anal as being ok for all women..." Different strokes for different folks: no one's saying your mode of pleasure is wrong, especially not #38. They're just saying it's not for everyone, and that that expectation that all women are cool with it isn't fair. (Obviously, not all men think that all women are down for the back door.)

DjeePee is simply pointing out the obstacles is a psychological one, not physiological. The body is quite capable of experiencing pleasure from the experience. Also we need an advocate for anal sex, so might as well be her. In prison its a social activity.

sammyjanette 17

Why do we need an advocate for anal sex? If someone doesn't want to do it they shouldn't be shamed into it.

@38 I wouldnt be in relationship with someone who thought you like you did, who simply rules things because you just dont like the idea of it, even if its part of catering to your partners needs. Sex is meant to have variety and be explored, and its 2 ways street. I get the feeling that you probably havent had much of it if you dont know that.

Hi! So, I read your comment and just wanted to point out that I think you misunderstood some of what I was saying. It wouldn't be that the girl doesn't like it because the guy doesn't like it, I was trying to say that men who don't like anal probably don't like it because you're putting something in your butt, and a woman might not like it for the same reason, not dependent on his opinion. Aside from that, I basically agree with what you said. I think it's totally fine if people (men&women) like anal, and I agree that men would seem to have more of a biological predisposition with the prostate to being able to enjoy it than women, and I think if one is neutral to sexual suggestions by the partner, one should try it. The point I was trying to make with my comment wasn't about anal being ok or not, it was about people expecting that all women would be into it, which is just unrealistic, and then pressuring those who are really sure about what they don't want. And I know I generalized, but I did mention that I was generalizing to avoid exactly the kind of misunderstanding we got here, to make clear that it's not just my opinion or one way, but that there are plenty of people with very varying sexual interests. Hope I cleared that up :)

At least he wants to change things up!

There's nothing romantic about anal. What did you expect?

anal between two gay men can be romantic.

Thats completely subjective and just your own little opinion, and not factual in any way. Anal can be very romantic between a loving couple.

In all fairness, for trying anal you'd have to be turned on and that would be probably sound hot at the time(well for me it would). Maybe not romantic but like everyone pointed its anal, nothing romantic about that.

i don't really equate sex and romance but i don't see how anal would be any less romantic than conventional sex and I would be laughing too hard to keep having sex if my s/o ever said anything like that.

graceinsheepwear 33

I am with you on all points, including the laughing.