All the FMLs

I'm the OP, and I'm glad this got published! For those wondering, it is a fake tree. And it was actually because of my laziness that I had her take it down because I never got around to it. That is when she came up with her "brilliant" idea to cover it with Valentine's Day decorations, which my parents did not seem too impressed with haha.

By WildShortstop13 - 28/01/2015 22:20 - United States - Rapid City

Today, I fell asleep curling my bangs. I now look like Mrs. Potato head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 304

You deserved it 13 290

By Anonymous - 28/01/2015 19:28 - United States - El Dorado Hills

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the local park for some romantic time together. By the time we left, I'd been called a pedo and a cradle robber, and been given several dirty looks. I'm 31. My boyfriend is 30 and just very baby-faced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 969

You deserved it 2 922

By retailshell - 28/01/2015 15:01 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hoped whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch." Okay then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 473

You deserved it 2 715

By anonpbc - 28/01/2015 13:51 - United States - Salina

Today, I went on my first date in over 4 years with a smoking hot guy. The big event was a trip to Target. I work at Target. He took me to my workplace for our date. And they say romance is dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 003

You deserved it 3 046

anonpbc tells us more.

anonpbc 20

Thursday 29 January 2015 23:20

OP here. To clarify for the haters, I do know what a date is supposed to be, I'm not an idiot. We had been planning to meet up for weeks. The date was lame, hence why I posted to FML. But it was definitely intended as a real date, accompanied by dinner and shopping a few other stores. No errands were ran, No groceries or Tp was purchased. I visited a few coworkers & he picked up a few electronics items. and no I didn't buy it or use my employee discount. It was my day off & he knew it was my workplace.

By tipmeover - 28/01/2015 13:09 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I had a job interview at a café. The interviewer asked me my availability and I told her that I was fully flexible. She laughed and said, "Really? That's tragic." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 312

You deserved it 2 745

By nsb124 - 28/01/2015 08:07 - United States

Today, it was my brother's birthday. I was short on money but got him a present anyway. After opening it, he looked at it and said, "I didn't really want this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 824

You deserved it 2 829

By MyUsernameisEpic - 28/01/2015 01:32 - United States - Winter Park

Today, I was talking to a girl. It was going pretty well until she said, "LOL." What's so bad about that? We weren't texting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 197

You deserved it 5 185

MyUsernameisEpic tells us more.

MyUsernameisEpic 29

Wednesday 28 January 2015 22:34

Okay, so this is my FML. The girl is 15, and we have classes together in school. I didn't really mind that she said it, but it was funny. That's why I decided to share it on here, and it actually got posted! Anyway, back to the story. We were talking in class about something and I made a joke and she started giggling and then, she said, "LOL!" Like, "el-oh-el". Also, I should mention that I wasn't flirting with her or anything. I'm not pursuing a relationship with her, but if I was, I wouldn't completely freak out and change my mind because she said lol. That'd make me a judgmental prick. That'd be pretty screwed up of me. Lastly, I'd like to say that I am friends with her, and just because she said lol, that doesn't mean I think she's stupid or anything.

By Anonymous - 28/01/2015 01:24 - United States - Rochester

Today, I spent over an hour shovelling the walkway and driveway, snow blowing in my face and down my coat. When I was finally finished, a guy started going through the neighborhood plowing everyone's driveways for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 478

You deserved it 2 990

By bitchypast - 27/01/2015 23:50 - United States - Rockland

Today, is the blizzard. I have to go into work, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't show up. I sent him a picture of the snow completely covering my car. He said I moved the snow there and could move it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 408

You deserved it 2 284

By I'm screwed - 27/01/2015 23:46 - United States - King Of Prussia

Today, after I got home from a long day at work. I go inside my room and find a life-size cut out of Miley Cyrus. I don't know how it got here. I'm the only person with a key to my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 696

You deserved it 2 397

By Animaldude55 - 27/01/2015 23:06 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was getting a haircut. During the haircut, the barber cut her hand. She hesitated for a minute then continued to run her hands through and cut my hair with her bloody fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 898

You deserved it 2 157

Animaldude55 tells us more.

Animaldude55 4

Thursday 29 January 2015 2:39

I am the OP. Basically it was near the end of the haircut when this happened so I didn't have time to say anothing. Just to add a few more details, she tried putting on a bandaid but it didn't work, rubbed her fingers on a towel I saw blood.