Today, I almost got our office burned down by plugging the wrong charger into a laptop cooling fan. Tried to hide the incident and kept it casual but the smoke detector led it to my area and everyone knew I was the culprit. I'm a new hire too. FML

by funfettifirework / 08/18/2016 at 1:08am / Philippines (Quezon City) / Work

Cryptobrancus's comment : Owning up to your mistakes makes a better impression than hiding them.

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Today, my overprotective dad bolted all of my windows shut so that I don't turn out like my sister and sneak out or sneak boys in. FML

by notthesame / 08/18/2016 at 12:45am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Dat_Class_Tho's comment : It obviously sucks to be punished for a sibling's bad choices. But you might also want to point out to your dad that he has created a fire hazard. If your family is renting, that might actually be a serious violation of your lease agreement. And if your family owns the place, he may have just voided your home owner's insurance. (unless he removes the bolts before anyone finds out).

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Today, I got in trouble with my boss for doing what she wanted me to do. I guess she didn't think I would do it and did it herself. FML

by Tired / 08/17/2016 at 1:51pm / Work

WCARlover's comment : But if she ended up doing it herself, that meant it wasn't yet done right? So you didn't end up doing what she wanted you to do...? Right? This fml is very confusing

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Today, the guy I like finally called to ask me to go grab a drink with him. I just moved six hours away. FML

by funnyhowthatwork / 08/17/2016 at 1:19pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my brother showed my wife a Craigslist ad by someone seeking casual sex. It had very specific details that made it seem like I wrote it. My brother later admitted in private that he made the post as revenge for me not loaning him $500 last month. Meanwhile, my wife still thinks I'm unfaithful. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2016 at 11:18am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

2016/08/17
Blog

Today, I spent nearly seven hours clearing out our storage room in order to transform it into my art studio. Things were going great until I tweaked my back. At least from my stationary position in bed I have a perfect view of the table I can't work at for the next 2 to 4 weeks. FML

by ArtistBlock / 08/17/2016 at 3:54am / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, it's again one of many times my mom dropped me off at the mall to hang out with friends. Since I have no friends, I shop by myself and always tell her I had "so much fun". FML

by FriendlessLoser / 08/17/2016 at 3:11am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

BoboCracker's comment about their FML

Today, I have an ear infection. I was resting outside when my young neighbor flew his RC plane right into my ear. FML

by BoboCracker / 07/29/2016 at 7:03pm / United States (California)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

BoboCracker

Op here, thanks for the funny comments, I'm here to clear up a few things. No, the whole plane didn't go into my ear, the nose got stuck and broke o...
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Today, I was at a bar with my girlfriend, and I noticed an obnoxious guy from college I used to hang out with. I tried to avoid eye contact, but all of a sudden he shouted, "There's the guy who puked his margarita back into the glass!" Everyone stared. Yup, that was me, just last week. FML

by Noah / 08/16/2016 at 2:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my boyfriend came home from a trip early without telling me. When I got to his house and saw his car there, I texted him and said, "Oh you asshole". About five minutes later, I got a text from my boss asking if that text was for him. FML

by DuckyDew / 08/16/2016 at 1:51pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, my boyfriend crashed our car into the car ahead. He was trying to pull away from the traffic lights faster than the person next to us, a ten-year-old kid on a bicycle. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2016 at 1:34pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was spending the night at my fiancé's house. He knew my period was about to start, so he asked if he needed to put a tarp down on the bed. He was dead serious. FML

by hannax / 08/16/2016 at 1:26pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Health