Today, I visited my Aunt in hospital. Another patient got jealous, so she threw a tantrum. She threw things at us, pulled her drip out, threw herself to the floor, screamed, pounded the floor with her fists and pissed herself. My aunt is still waiting for a new room, and the staff blame me. FML
by ANON / 09/21/2016 at 10:09am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health
LyricaSilvan's comment : Another patient got jealous of you visiting your aunt, and the staff blame you for the chaos she created as a result...How exactly does this equate to you being at fault, again? Assuming that this other patient was merely your aunt's hospital roomie and not someone you actually knew, it cannot rightfully be blamed on you that she flipped out. It isn't your fault that her own family didn't happen to visit the same day you came to see your aunt. The hospital staff need to pull the sticks out of their asses.
Today, at my job of 2 months, I'd taken it upon myself to water the plants around the office every day since they all looked a little sad. My boss then asked why so many of the fake plants were getting mouldy. My co-workers had watched me water plastic plants for 2 months and nobody bothered to tell me. FML
wanted_2_want's comment : That's amazing. I mean you couldn't touch the stems or leaves since day one?
Today, whilst in a dressing room trying on some new clothes, I experienced the sheer terror of having someone fling a pair of dirty panties over the stall wall only to make off with some stolen ones, whilst you're still standing there in shock staring at another woman's dirty underwear. FML
by grossed out / 09/21/2016 at 5:21am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
WinterChild's comment : Well, I guess now you know Victoria's dirty secret.
by JordLostItagain3 / 09/21/2016 at 3:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Money
Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML
by Alyssa / 09/21/2016 at 3:17am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by ang3l4 / 09/21/2016 at 1:28am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I tried to jokingly hold the door shut so my friend, who I'd seen walking down the hall to our class, couldn't get in. It was funny, until my new teacher yelled "Open the damn door!" from the other side. FML
by anonymous / 09/20/2016 at 6:49pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, my sister insisted on taking a picture of her plate of pasta “to show her friends what an unworthy family we are”. It was only after she put a candle on her plate that we realized we forgot her birthday. All of us. FML
by American Idiot / 09/20/2016 at 3:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by PleaseDontHateMe / 09/20/2016 at 12:42pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by hk / 09/20/2016 at 11:29am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Love
by Whybother / 09/20/2016 at 4:13am / United States (Hawaii) / Work
Today, I've been recovering for a week from my medically needed circumcision. I'm 30, and they advise you wear essentially a jock strap for the first week to help. It wasn't too bad until I went to take the thing off and it caught a stitch on my manhood. That's the most unique pain ever. FML
by T3kM4n / 09/20/2016 at 2:08am / United States (Washington) / Health