By - 12/2/2020 20:00 Discover secret Today, my mom kicked me out and laughed at me. Why? She caught me wearing nothing but a pink thong. I’m a male who wants to cross-dress and am self conscious. FML I agree, your life sucks 1678 You deserved it 780 133 8 27 54 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 12/2/2020 18:00 Right in the millet Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and our grandma walked in the room. FML I agree, your life sucks 754 You deserved it 1952 62 16 189 98 33 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 12/2/2020 14:00 - United States Almost father Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML I agree, your life sucks 21940 You deserved it 108043 35 6 85 202 821 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 12/2/2020 05:00 Chance would have it Today, I found my ex on bumble after she told me that she needed a break from our relationship and just want to focus on herself. She also said that she is too busy to worry about anyone else but she said she is looking for a relationship on bumble. FML I agree, your life sucks 1486 You deserved it 197 84 7 18 14 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 12/2/2020 00:00 Good idea Today, my girlfriend parked in a disabled space with no authorisation. There was a car park attendant walking towards the car and before we got out she said to me, “sorry, but needs must” and she punched me in the balls. The attendant thought I was disabled when I got out. FML I agree, your life sucks 1801 You deserved it 268 15 8 60 176 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 11/2/2020 20:00 Swinish moment Today I went to change my daughter's diaper, mind you this was a blow out. She threw her hands down to get poop all over her arms, hands, then face. FML I agree, your life sucks 1343 You deserved it 170 23 3 36 71 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By enchilada_ice_cream - 11/2/2020 18:00 Crazy and Spicy Today, my wife and I tried to spice up our sex by blindfolding her. She started saying it felt good inside her, but I hadn’t gone in yet. I look down and our hamster escaped from its cage and was crawling inside her. FML I agree, your life sucks 1609 You deserved it 474 59 7 324 87 31 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/2/2020 14:00 My husband's passion Today, my husband loves his cat more than our new baby daughter. This morning he spent 2 hours playing with the cat, yet when I handed him his flesh and blood daughter, he found an excuse to hand her back after 5 minutes, then 5 minutes after that, he was playing with the cat again. FML I agree, your life sucks 1408 You deserved it 271 109 4 20 77 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 11/2/2020 05:00 Sly boyfriend Today, during a drunk game of truth or dare, my boyfriend of 3 years admitted he secretly fabricates reasons for himself, or me, to punish my 7 years old son by sending him to his room, where he will end up sulking for several hours, all, so he won’t have to bother co-parenting for those hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 1959 You deserved it 286 214 3 122 15 31 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/2/2020 01:00 Typing error Today I sent an email to the whole department in my company. Instead of "Best Regards," I had typed "Best Retards," I'm the best retard. FML. I agree, your life sucks 1386 You deserved it 495 2 5 9 229 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 10/2/2020 20:00 Waste moment Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We decided then to come home and planned an intimate moment. I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I fell asleep right before we started. FML I agree, your life sucks 854 You deserved it 1039 15 8 9 132 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 10/2/2020 18:00 Chubby life Today, I was tying my hair up when my dad rubbed my stomach and asked how his grandchild was doing. He knows I'm not pregnant and that I've been trying really hard to lose weight. FML I agree, your life sucks 2097 You deserved it 216 167 6 51 66 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 10/2/2020 05:00 The bad luck Today, I decided to go put gas in my car, I got to the gas station and realized my purse was in my room hanging up laughing at my silly self. FML I agree, your life sucks 738 You deserved it 955 27 7 3 78 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 10/2/2020 01:00 Where it is? Today, my girlfriend and I were doing the deed when she suddenly said "hold on babe, I think my nose ring fell out." After she couldn't find it for a minute she said "I'm sure it's on the bed somewhere." Immediately after that she yelled "OH MY GOD I JUST SWALLOWED IT.". I agree, your life sucks 1440 You deserved it 234 15 6 38 138 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 9/2/2020 20:00 Booby phone Today, when I was getting off the toilet, my phone fell out of my pocket. Now, it too is soiled with diarrhea. FML I agree, your life sucks 1527 You deserved it 419 22 4 68 97 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 9/2/2020 18:00 Unforgettable night Today, the guy I'm sleeping with left marks all over me because he was drunk. I'm 30 and work tomorrow & feel like a horny teen with a huge hickey on my neck. FML I agree, your life sucks 870 You deserved it 1540 13 11 19 193 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 9/2/2020 14:00 Get blown off Today, I finally had the courage to tell my crush that I liked her. And She said she preferred older men. I agree, your life sucks 1605 You deserved it 157 90 7 16 44 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 9/2/2020 05:00 fatal error Today, my wife informed me that she could lose her job at the local high school, why? she accidentally sent a student a nude photo of her that she meant to send to me. FML I agree, your life sucks 2010 You deserved it 280 18 10 180 58 18 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 9/2/2020 01:00 disappointed girlfriend Today I had just masturbated when my girlfriend came over and wanted sex straight away. It was too soon after my first orgasm and I couldn’t get an erection. She got unreasonably upset, accused me of not being attracted to her anymore and ran out crying before I could explain myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 1692 You deserved it 681 41 10 29 115 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 8/2/2020 21:00 Famous moisturizer Today, I was masturbating. And when I nutted, I hid everything, cleaned myself up. My mom got in my room asking if I want something to eat. She then saw the hand moisturizer that I did not hide. She asked what is that. Then she realized and get off my room. FML I agree, your life sucks 1086 You deserved it 842 12 6 9 142 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 8/2/2020 18:00 Crazy party Today, I heard that there's a rumour going around that I was caught masturbating while crying at a party after the girl I liked got with someone else. FML I agree, your life sucks 1848 You deserved it 228 21 6 34 134 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Kid Napper - 8/2/2020 15:00 - Romania - Suceava Ugly cut Today, my little sister cut my hair super short without me knowing or seeing how much she cut it. And when I showed mom, she beat me because I let my sister cut my hair. FML I agree, your life sucks 1573 You deserved it 348 89 3 48 39 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 8/2/2020 05:00 My homework Today, my mom called to tell me that I needed to clean the side of her couch. Why? Because someone picked their nose and wiped snot all on the side of it. She thinks it was me because I sat there last. It was not me, and I don't even live there, I have 2 teenage siblings that blame everything on me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1598 You deserved it 115 21 3 57 35 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 8/2/2020 01:00 He is worried Today my husband, with genuine concern, asked if I would be able to breast feed our kids when he is born since my boobs are so small... FML I agree, your life sucks 1778 You deserved it 193 25 11 20 168 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 7/2/2020 12:00 - Canada - Edmonton New one Today, I closed my eyes while my boyfriend was fingering me, and I felt a cold liquid inside me. I opened my eyes, and he was pouring yogurt into me. He said “I wanted to try something new.” FML I agree, your life sucks 2069 You deserved it 233 16 7 136 168 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 7/2/2020 18:00 Bachelor party Today, I had to cancel my wedding because my fiancé is so hungover from his bachelor party, he's throwing up all over the place, can't stand up straight and is calling me by the stripper's name he met yesterday night. FML I agree, your life sucks 2514 You deserved it 341 70 6 123 108 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By "QueenCortana Tiffany Turner" - 7/2/2020 14:00 Temper tantrum Today, the cops were called to my apartment because my daughter had a temper tantrum while I was at work. She was naked when they were there. FML I agree, your life sucks 1594 You deserved it 168 9 5 86 33 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Broke - 7/2/2020 05:00 - United States This is my life Today, I need money to fix my car, I need my car to get to work, and I need work to get money. FML I agree, your life sucks 1688 You deserved it 151 90 4 21 42 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By billjoebob424 - 7/2/2020 01:00 - Canada Much pleasure Today, I've realised that I give my girlfriend more pleasure with back rubs than with anything sexual. FML. I agree, your life sucks 1487 You deserved it 452 25 12 9 132 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 6/2/2020 20:00 Family life Today, my wife told me that she has been unhappy for a long time and wanted a divorce. We bought a 200,000 house 6 months ago and we bought her a brand new car 2 months ago. Unhappy for a long time? FML I agree, your life sucks 2134 You deserved it 258 150 4 41 23 19 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, I realised I had 4 (justifiable) FML posts in 48 hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 9 You deserved it 2 0 Comments
Today, while me and my husband had sex, I called my husband "Gabe". That's nowhere near his name and I don't even know a Gabe. He then asked what that... I agree, your life sucks 133 You deserved it 52 3 Comments
Today, I wanted to surprise my husband because of valentine's day by being naked with a towel. I waited behind a door for him to enter. When he arrived,... I agree, your life sucks 744 You deserved it 784 15 Comments
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