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Today, I visited my sick grandpa for a few hours in the hospital. His roommate, also an elderly man, wouldn't stop masturbating. FML

#21388711
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29295) - you deserved it (1852)

On 04/06/2015 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by therewasnocurtain - United States (Idaho)

HeyItsCamilo's comment : elder people,they get to a point were they just dont give a fuck.

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Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML

#21388704
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25650) - you deserved it (1587)

On 04/06/2015 at 4:02pm - work - by tee - United States (Missouri)

Today, I forgot my boyfriend was allergic to nuts and ate Nutella toast before he arrived. He had just brought me flowers for doing well in an exam and I kissed him. He had a reaction and I had to stab him in the leg. FML

#21388685
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29418) - you deserved it (8889)

On 04/06/2015 at 3:38pm - love - by rhunter17 -

leopardwilliam's comment : Had this happen to me. Not fun at all. Hope he's okay and don't feel too bad, you forgot. It happens occasionally

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Today, I spent my last $50 to get a ticket to take my daughter out for a nice birthday dinner tonight. It wasn't until after I purchased it that I realized the restaurant isn't even open on Mondays. FML

#21388611
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26142) - you deserved it (4727)

On 04/06/2015 at 12:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

cmonger's comment : Just take her tomorrow. I'm sure she'll understand.

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Today, I saw one one of my cat's hairs on my sweatpants and wanted to remove it. It wasn't a cat hair, but a pubic hair that has found its way through my panties and sweatpants while being still attached to me. FML

Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML

#21388506
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26348) - you deserved it (3133)

On 04/06/2015 at 7:44am - animals - by tannerrosetx_1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML

#21388350
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25472) - you deserved it (4359)

On 04/05/2015 at 11:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got hit by a car. Not a real one, though; my sister thought it would be funny to take her RC car and smash it over my head as hard as she could. FML

Today, my brother in law brought a dead rabbit to my nephew saying, "I found the Easter Bunny!" My nephew started crying hours ago and hasn't stopped. FML

#21388202
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28336) - you deserved it (2157)

On 04/05/2015 at 6:19pm - animals - by :O - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I found out my car needs an oil change. I had to listen the warning alert beep for over 200 miles. FML

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

#21388113
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30823) - you deserved it (3266)

On 04/05/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by Itsbeen8years (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation where I had no internet whatsoever. I turned on my phone to get notifications, hoping to see a message or two that I'd missed while gone. There was 1 notification, telling me how many FMLs were posted while I was away. FML

#21388075
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28881) - you deserved it (2747)

On 04/05/2015 at 2:03pm - misc - by supercharged - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML

#21388006
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29661) - you deserved it (3287)

On 04/05/2015 at 11:38am - misc - by tardspawn (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)



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