Today, I was at a concert and I was having so much fun. Unfortunately, this was cut short when the person behind me with the worst halitosis started singing along to the songs. He knew ALL the lyrics. FML

by shtzbutnogiggles / 05/17/2016 at 10:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I arrived to work at exactly 8 so I could leave at exactly 5, without overtime. I found out later that my brother took my keys with him somewhere and now I can't enter the house until he gets back at 11. FML

by rhplb / 05/17/2016 at 9:10am / Philippines (Quezon City) / Work

Today, I was reminded what poverty is like when I had to choose between buying food and buying pads. Now, I have to take constant bathroom breaks and wipe off my pad. I don't get paid until after my period ends. FML

by poorgirl / 05/17/2016 at 9:03am / United States / Money

Welshite's comment : Invest in a menstrual cup. The cups are reusable and pay for themselves over just a few months.

See all the comments

Today, my father bought a pair of fancy noise cancelling headphones. He doesn't realise that the noise cancelling function only slightly muffles the moaning and screaming in the porn he's watching. FML

by Char-azard / 05/17/2016 at 5:03am / New Zealand (Hawke's Bay) / Miscellaneous

leftwardfoil's comment : I don't think he understands the purpose of noise-cancelling headphones.

See all the comments

Today, I saw a man help an elderly lady with her tray at the local McDonald's. I wanted to do something nice for him, so I added a couple extra nuggets in his meal. He later came up to me and told me I was dumb and didn't know how to count, and that was why I was working at McDonald's. FML

by korbo7 / 05/16/2016 at 11:26pm / United States (Nebraska) / Work

drayloon's comment : Extra McNuggets are considered a McBlessing to most people

See all the comments

Today, I went to get a haircut. The guy next to me was in an Army uniform and had requested a short buzz cut. My stylist had to take a call, so another came out and there must've been a miscommunication, but by then, she was already fast at work. Guess who got stuck with the other guy's haircut. FML

by Buzzed_Head9 / 05/16/2016 at 10:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because he’d been rolling in mud. I returned to find him totally shaved, save his head and tail. FML

by VieDeChien / 10/30/2012 at 12:24am / China (Chongqing)

Today, at the laundromat. I loaded a huge load into the top dryer, put all the quarters in, and started the bottom one. I realized my mistake when I came to check on it. FML

by anonymous / 05/16/2016 at 8:29pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

DandoisFLAT's comment about their FML

Today, my girlfriend texted me "I think we should move in". Then, ten seconds later she sent another text that said, "Sorry, typo. Move on". FML

by DandoisFLAT / 08/11/2013 at 10:42pm / United States (Michigan)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

DandoisFLAT

Hey, just wanted to inform everyone that yes, she is obviously my ex-girlfriend now and that i'm feeling fine. I was actually out skateboarding with s...

Today, my new upstairs neighbours sent away a package, telling the delivery guy that the person doesn't live there anymore. The package is a birthday present from my mother in-law, and it's been sent back twice now, even after talking to them and leaving a letter for them with my name on it. FML

Today, I told my cousin it would be okay if he stayed the weekend after a fight with his wife. He didn't tell me he was bringing his 4 kids. They've watched funny cat videos for hours and they laugh like maniacs. FML

by kids are meh / 05/16/2016 at 5:47pm / United States (Louisiana) / Kids

Today, my boss joined me on my vacation, to "make sure I actually went". FML

by are you kidding me? / 05/16/2016 at 5:24pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, in Indonesia, while being driven around on a motorcycle, the rider told me that he was in love with me, and that he was very rich. He offered me the equivalent of 7 euros in exchange for my services in a nearby bush. FML

by Anonyme / 12/03/2015 at 1:22am / Indonesia